Memories of a Nobody
by RukiaKiryu
Summary: "I don't want your help Potter and I don't need your pity! Stay out of it!" But there was a sadness in those silver eyes… An emptiness that betrayed the blond's words, and Harry understood now what he should have known all along. "You want to go Azkaban…" Harry muttered. "You mean to die... don't you?" Post War, Eventual Drarry.
1. Narcissa Malfoy: Draco's Task

**So this is my first HP fic but I've been thinking about doing this for a long time. Constructive criticism is welcomed but flames will be ignored or flamed back. Fair warning. Also, there will eventually be a relationship between Harry and Draco so if this is offensive to you I suggest you don't continue. If it is not however, please enjoy! **

**Takes place after the Battle at Hogwarts. Disregards Epilogue. Pretty much my take on what life was like for Draco and Narcissa Malfoy during their time with the Death Eaters and Voldemort. Auror Potter!  
**

...

Narcissa stood in the middle of the drawing room, her blue eyes staring unblinkingly at the fireplace, long pale fingers clasped around a stark, white handkerchief. Her platinum blonde hair was pulled into a tight bun, displaying an intricate pair of silver and emerald earrings that matched her dark green robes. Despite her well-dressed appearance however, Harry could just make out the dark circles and hallowed cheeks on the proud feminine face. It was frightening how thin she was, the stress from both the war and the twenty or so Death Eaters currently occupying the room was draining her.

Watching the dark followers warily, Harry wondered just how it had happened that the Malfoy Manor came to house them. From what he had seen, none of the Malfoys looked particularly overjoyed that their home had become a military base. Even now Narcissa stood alone, distancing herself from the boisterous laughter and gossip that bounced across the room.

_She doesn't want to be here. _Harry thought to himself as he watched the witch in curiosity. As she had ignored the conversations around her, Harry in return couldn't catch a word of what was being said until a dark blur skipped towards them.

"Cissy!" Bellatrix whined as she came upon her sister, wrapping her arms around Narcissa's waist. "Draco. Will. Be. Fine." She cackled, leaning her chin upon her sibling's shoulder. If Narcissa was bothered by the action she didn't show it, her head dipped forward in a nod before she returned her eyes to the glowing embers.

"Draco?" Harry murmured, receiving no answer as he scanned the faces again for the familiar grey eyes. Draco was not amongst the Death Eaters. "Where is Draco?"

A sudden roar of green flames caused the voices in the room to quiet as Snape appeared from the fireplace, followed a moment later by Draco Malfoy. Narcissa's lip twitched upward in the smallest sense of a smile, relief barely able to reach her eyes before it retreated behind the stoic mask once more. "Draco." She greeted coolly as he stepped over the hearth, taking her outstretched hands in his. Harry was now very much aware that it was Narcissa's demeanor that her son had taken instruction from, not his father's.

Where Lucius had always seemed cold and unpleasant Narcissa was downright indifferent. If it hadn't been for the fact that Harry had been there to witness her statue-like form waiting for her son, he would have assumed she hadn't given a moment's thought to his absence.

"Mother." Draco replied tiredly. Harry stared at the all too familiar face; it was perhaps the first time in years that he was able to stand this close to the Slytherin. His appearance had taken the same sunken look as his mother's; grey eyes drooping in fatigue, worry lines stuck upon his brow and the corners of his pursed lips… It was however, his complexion that now caused the disconcerting feeling in Harry. Draco's ivory skin had always been a unique characteristic but now it was stained an unhealthy shade of grey, the once ethereal features looking weathered and ashen…

Part of Harry wanted to reach out and touch him as assurance that Draco was still alive while another part of him was afraid that the contact would cause him to wither away. _He's ill… _The revelation caused Harry to real backwards. How could he not have noticed? With all the time spent stalking him, researching, starring… Not once had he paid attention, not once had he thought about the boy's health when it was so blatantly clear Draco was suffering some sort of condition…

"Well? What did he say Draco?" Bellatrix asked as she moved from Narcissa's waist to her nephew's. It was a struggle for Draco to keep his face as impassive as his mother's but he managed to simply roll his eyes at the female Death Eater who clung to him as she would a lover.

"Draco has been given a task from the Dark Lord." Snape answered instead, walking away from the hearth and sitting lazily on the leather chair behind Narcissa. Curious murmurs erupted from the other side of the room and Harry felt his breath catch in his throat.

"Task?" Narcissa asked, her eyes darting from Serveus to her son. Her hands gripped Draco's tighter, the handkerchief slipping from her fingers and falling quietly to the floor.

Bellatrix made a sound between a squeal and a cackle, kissing Draco lovingly on the cheek as she danced on the balls of her feet, never releasing the young Malfoy from her possessive hold. "What is it Draco? What did he ask of you?"

"He must kill Albus Dumbledore." Snape replied thickly and Harry watched the hopelessness creep into the whites of Draco's eyes. Until this moment he had remained unmoved, trying to follow his mother's lead and succeeding in keeping his emotions in check; but now his body sagged forward, his eyebrows knitting together in confusion and distress. Narcissa blinked, once, twice… She again gazed at Serveus but before she could open her mouth Bellatrix was giggling.

"Kill! Dumbledore!" Soon the rest of the Death Eater's joined her until the entire room was echoing in laughter. Only the two Malfoys and Snape remained silent. "Draco! He's asked Draco to do this?" Bellatrix gasped in disbelief, still unable to control her cackling voice. "Our little Draco? Oh to have the chance you have!"

"He jests, surely?" Narcissa asked, releasing her son to turn and face Serveus. Snape, not to be outdone, had kept his stony disposition as well. His eyes glared warning daggers at Narcissa. "The Dark Lord can't really mean for him-"

"The Dark Lord was quite clear in his orders. He is giving this chance to allow the Malfoys to prove their loyalty after your husband's pathetic display at the ministry." Serveus hissed and the room fell quite once more. Harry watched Narcissa's mask falter, he could see the anger welling up to flush her pale face. Draco seemed to have sensed the change in her as well for he reached for her arm, only to have it yanked out of his grasp.

"Impossible!" Narcissa demanded, the fury in her voice lashing out like a whip. "He can't possibly expect Draco to kill Dumbledore! The Dark Lord himself wasn't even able to accomplish- "

Harry watched in horror as the Death Eaters moved simultaneously, encircling Narcissa with their wands drawn and pointed at her chest. It was Bellatrix however whose arm flicked out with practiced precision, her ugly face contorted in anger as she moved to curse her younger sister. "Cruc-"Narcissa didn't even attempt a defensive spell. Her back straightened like a poll, waiting, preparing herself for the pain that was about to come.

Harry watched frozen as Draco moved between them, using his body as a shield while forcing the two witches apart; but the relief was short lived, Narcissa was suddenly thrown backwards from the force of his slap, tumbling to the floor. "Silence!" Draco roared above his mother, grey eyes glinting like a knife in a murderous glare. "How dare you speak against the Dark Lord!" He hissed, his voice seething in rage. "How dare you question my authority! I am now master of this manor and the Dark Lord chose _me_ for this task! You_ will_ hold your tongue! Do you understand?"

The silence was suffocating as Narcissa stared disbelieving at her son, genuine hurt written upon every crevice of her face. "You bloody bastard-" Harry turned to Draco, his own hands clenched into fists, wanting nothing more than to slap _him _when he saw… Saw the smirks fluttering over the faces of the other Death Eaters. Saw Bellatrix Lestrange lowering her wand and starring at her nephew in new found adoration. They were grinning at Narcissa Malfoy crumbled on the carpeted floor.

And then there was Draco, with his back now facing the Death Eaters Harry saw the sad grey eyes that were glossy with unshed tears. The blond's body trembled, perspiration glistening off his narrow face as he silently gasped for air. The attack seemed to have drained him. He was crumbling, his body betraying the fury in his voice and only Harry could allow himself to reach out to him, feeling guilt well in his chest as his fingers phased through the pale wrist.

Snape kept his hand hidden under his robe, trying to ignore the desperate look of his godson and keep his wary gaze on the other members of the room although it was clear the danger had passed. Draco's act had the dark followers grinning in appreciation at the youngest Death Eater.

"Forgive me." Narcissa finally spoke, pushing herself into a sitting position. "I did not mean to offend you or the Dark Lord." Her body looked so incredibly fragile as she struggled to stand on her own, facing Draco with cold, empty eyes. "It was a mother's worry. It's hard for me to see you grow up. I still think of you as a child when you clearly are not."

The guilt on Draco's face was nearly too much to take. The blond swallowed thickly, standing toe to toe with the woman who birthed him, his eyes pleading, begging for forgiveness even though his voice was astonishingly calm. "Get used to it then." Draco stated darkly. "I will not be treated like a child in my own manor, not even by you." Harry felt his chest clench as the proud back of Narcissa Malfoy bent forward in one deep, elegant bow.

"It won't happen again." She replied quietly. Bellatrix giggled, her wiry arms snaking around Draco's chest to look over at her sister.

"I'm proud of you Draco." She drawled in the blond's ear. "You have so much more backbone then your father." Draco didn't reply as she purred along his long pale neck, her slender fingers tracing circles over his black jacket.

"You really should be more careful about how you speak Cissy." Bellatrix added matter-of-factly, as if she hadn't just been about use an unforgivable on her. Narcissa nodded once again. "Come Draco, we'll make plans then. You have a whole year to do it, let's see if we can make Dumboldore suffer!"

The blonds face scrunched into a sickened sneer, his gaze lingered on his mother a moment longer, forcing the impeccable mask back into place before he turned to his aunt. "Of course, Auntie Bella."

"Draco…" Harry called, knowing full well he would be ignored as the former Slytherin allowed himself to be guided into the group of Death Eaters. _Don't do this… _but the ice prince was already beginning to fade, the room suddenly disappearing as the memory materialized into a bedroom instead.

The term _Master _bedroom seemed like an insult in Harry's opinion. It was bigger than the Dursley's entire first floor. A huge king-sized bed sat bellow a bay window, with the calacatta marble walls and white furnishings offering a pleasant and surprisingly light atmosphere that Harry wasn't anticipating as a common Malfoy bedroom.

Harry was also not anticipating the purely defeated gaze of Narcissa Malfoy staring unseeingly back at him as she sat at the foot of her mattress. It was unnerving, watching the icy blue eyes fill with pain and sadness; the proud shoulders slumping forward in fatigue… He watched her… The coldest women he knew, sinking into despair.

"Mother…" Draco's voice called from behind the closed door and Harry studied the emotions flickering over her worried face.

"Enter." She called quietly, her body noticeably stiffening as the Slytherin Prince glided inside. Draco glanced at his mother once and then pressed himself against the wall, holding his finger to his lips in a demand of silence. A long moment passed, then another until he seemed content to close the door, sparing one last glance behind himself before he turned the lock with a flick of his wrist.

"Draco-"

He was before her in a moment, crossing the room in three large strides and then threw himself at her feet, burying his face into her lap. "Forgive me!" He sobbed. "Forgive me!" Harry stood there, not knowing what to do as he watched his long time enemy crying into the skirts of his mother. The blond's body trembled as he kneeled on the floor, his voice hitching, his hands fisting the emerald material above her knee.

"Draco…" For the first time since the memory began Narcissa's voice cracked, understanding lacing every letter as her pale fingers began to run through his platinum hair. "Shhh." She cooed gently, soothingly... It was all Harry could do to not look away. "I'm alright."

"I'm sorry mother. I didn't want to hurt you!" He gasped. "Please forgive me. I was so afraid… Auntie Bella would have… I couldn't let her! Not again... I couldn't see you go through that again!" He sobbed. "I-"

She gently slipped her finger under his chin and lifted his face to meet her empathetic gaze. "No, you didn't do anything wrong. You were protecting me."

Draco snorted in disbelief, guilt written plainly across his features. She ignored it however and continued. "I wasn't thinking when I questioned the Dark Lord. If you hadn't intervened Bella would have done more than the Cruciatus curse." Her words didn't seem to reassure him as he looked unseeingly towards the window, tears streaming down his blanched face.

"If I were really able to protect you I would take you away from here." He said so quietly Harry had to walk closer to hear his words. "I'm pathetic. I can't do anything but nod and snivel after them. I hit you." His face scrunched in disgust as he looked back up at her. "I hit you, my own mother!"

Another sob chocked him as he buried his face into her lap again. "I can't do this mother! I c-can't kill him! I don't _want_ to kill him! To kill anyone!"

"It'll be alright." Narcissa whispered above him, her own silent tears falling over her son's back. "It's going to be alright…"

Harry watched the scene until it began to dissolve, pale grey and blue smoke falling away as he surfaced from the pensieve to find himself standing above the stone bowl. Kingsley met his eyes and without a word reached into his pocket to offer Harry his handkerchief. "Not exactly what you were expecting huh?" Was he crying? When had that happened?

Harry took the handkerchief with a nod and removed his glasses to wipe his eyes dry. "You're sure this is…accurate?" He asked doubtfully. His head was reeling with everything he had just witnessed. Draco Malfoy… The unbearable, racist, conceited, arrogant prick! Was this really the same boy who had stomped Harry's own face in?

"I assure you, the memories are legitimate. We've tested them for any abnormalities and I was there where Narcissa Malfoy gave them up. They haven't left my side since." Kingsley motioned to his desk where a row of vials sat, each little glass bottle filled to the brim with the same silvery wisps of smoke that Harry had just returned from.

Oh. Well, maybe it was the same Draco…

"I don't know what to think about all of these Harry. If it's all true then really, we should be giving Narcissa and Draco a medal. But…."

"You can't seriously think that?" Harry cut in. Okay, maybe Draco wasn't a complete arsehole, but a medal? Really, the memory only showed he wasn't a cold blooded killer and Harry had seen that on his own before all of this started, although he had chalked it up to guilt at the time.

"You need to see the other memories Harry. Hers and his."

"His? You have Draco's memories? How? He's still unconscious." Harry frowned, knowing full well that Draco wouldn't willingly give up his memories. Obviously there were things that he didn't know about the young Malfoy but this was something he would bet his own life on.

Kingsley moved around his desk, digging through a pile of papers until he found a manila envelope. "When You Know Who returned four years ago Narcissa and Draco made up a will, should the worst happen... Draco's gives his mother power of attorney and seeing as he has been in a coma for weeks now she is allowed to offer them to us."

Harry let that sink in, hesitantly taking the envelope to open Draco's file. The will was there. A quick skim through confirmed Kingsley's explanation. He frowned and forced the file closed, not comfortable with reading anymore about the blond then necessary. "Did he have memories saved or something?"

"No, not exactly." Harry met Kingsley's guilty gaze. Oh.

"Legilimency?" Harry asked with a frown, a nod was his only reply. "But Draco is an a Occlumens. Trying to do that-"

"His coma has made defending himself quite impossible. One who masters occlumency can indeed tamper or suppress a memory but the young Malfoy is in no condition to do either one. At the moment, it's far more successful than using the pensieve and the chance of him_ lying_ is next to zero. His mind at the moment is quite literally an open book..."

Harry shook his head. Having gone through the lessons with Snape, he knew what it was like, having no control of what people could see. He had hated it then, the feeling of being violated, for the assailant to have known every filthy detail... Your words, your feelings, your thoughts… Using the pensieve on Narcissa's memories had been hard enough, Harry couldn't imagine crossing this line with Draco. "You've done it haven't you? You read his mind?"

The answer was apparent. Kingsley 's eyes were filled with guilt. "I promised Narcissa that I would be the only one to do so… However she…"

Uh oh…

"She what?" Harry pressed, an uneasy feeling churning his stomach as the guilty eyes narrowed in on him. "Why exactly am I here? Why did you ask me to look at the pensieve?"

"It was the condition she gave us… Harry, the Malfoy's trials are coming up. Believe me, Narcissa didn't want to do any of this, but when we told her that Draco would be taken to Azkaban if he was found guilty she consented to give these to us. Her only condition was that_ you_ investigate them."

"What?" No. Nope. No way. This crossed more lines than he thought possible. Delving into Draco Malfoy's life? He was sure that seeing Narcissa's memory would have had him cursed into oblivion should the blonde ever find out. Jumping full on into the Slytherin's mind, his family, his childhood? It was too much. Harry had fought off Voldermort for Merlin's sake, he didn't want another crazed dark wizard out for his blood; which is exactly what would happen when Draco woke up and found out he had done this.

"You want me to use legilimency on him? I don't have that training! And even if I did I don't think having me do it would be ethical." As if the practice was ethical to begin with… "We have history, even before Voldemort returned. I can't just snoop through their lives when I spent a whole three years fighting against them. Why did she want me to do this?"

Narcissa Malfoy was not a stupid woman. She had managed after all to successfully lie to the Dark Lord. To have him live in her house and keep her son alive and her arm untouched by the dark mark. Surely, she wouldn't ask for Harry Potter to become the Auror on her case when the outcome meant the life or death of her only child.

"Believe me Harry, I told her that, but she insisted. She didn't tell me why, only that she would not consent to the memories if you weren't the one investigating. As they do give us solid evidence against the other Death Eaters as well, I told her that I would ask you… It is however, your choice. I would understand if you refuse this."

"Why make me watch this then?" Harry waved to the pensieve.

"She asked me to… and I wanted to give you as much as I could about the attack that lead to Dumbledore's death…" Well, that was unfair. Harry looked back at the empty vile sitting on the desk and he reached for it.

"Why this one specifically? I'm sure there are others that would have been more relevant…" Kingsley smiled sadly. He knew he would do it. The moment he had mentioned Dumbledore's name he knew what Harry's answer would be.

"It is… the easiest one to get through." Easy? _That_ was easy? Snorting Harry removed his wand and began coaxing the memory back into its bottle. "Harry… I need to warn you. There are things in their memories about them, about _you_… You will get hurt."

Hurt? What could possibly hurt him anymore? He had gone through it all. The betrayal of his fellow Gryffindor's through fifth year. The mocking and teasing and attacks on his life. He had lived with the Dursleys. Seen his godfather die. Witnessed the death of friends, loved ones. How could a memory hurt him anymore than those things combined? But Kingsley looked sincere, his usual calm face filled with worry.

"I understand." Harry replied, looking down again at the now full vile. "I'll do it though." He supposed he owed the Malfoy's that much. Draco had after all spared his life at the manor and Narcissa had saved him in the Forbidden Forest. What harm could really be done besides enraging Draco if and when he came to? It's not as if he hadn't been subject to the blond's disdain before. If this is what it would take to repay his debt then so be it. He was Harry Potter, youngest Auror in the Ministry, Savior of the Wizarding World. All he had to do was go through some memories and give a truthful report at their trial… Right?

Harry placed the bottle back down with the rest of them. His eyes skimming over the label once more. _Narcissa Malfoy: Draco's task_, it read. Harry sighed as he turned away, the uneasy feeling rising up to his chest. It was only a memory… So why did he feel so terrified?

**Reviews are love! Hope you enjoyed! **


	2. There Was Never a Choice

**Wow! Thank you everyone for all the reviews, likes and favorites! They mean the world to me. I have such a great idea for the plot but I'm always afraid that my writing won't be able to portray it. I hope you all continue to read this. I know it's your time and your love for the characters that are at stake so I will do my absolute best to make it worth your while. **

**Just on a side note: The fanfic takes place a couple months after the Battle at Hogwarts and there is a bit of difference in the events that occurred there than the actual book. Malfoy's coma for one thing, so please. I know some things won't mash up but for the stories sake, please pretend they did. I hope you enjoy this chapter! **

...

"You have to investigate Draco Malfoy?" Hermione looked at him incredulously, her tea cup freezing in midair before she was able to bring it to her lips. Steam curtained over her face as she weighed his words but it was Ron's disgusted look that drew Harry's gaze.

"You're serious? You have to investigate that git? He's guilty! He has the mark! All that's left is to toss him into Azkaban!" Harry frowned at his friends, the three of them sitting quietly at the table of the newly renovated Burrow. Everything looked exactly the same, from the funny little garden to the unique wall clock where Fred's silver arm now permanently rested in the empty space between 'home' and 'mortal peril'; With the only other difference being that two hands had been added, one for Harry and the other for Hermione.

Having altered the memories of her own parents, Hermione was adopted into the Burrow, her standing quickly moving into daughter-in-law since her engagement to Ron. And Harry, always having been a welcomed visitor opted in spending more time with his pseudo-family then sitting alone at Grimmauld Place with nothing more than Kreacher's scowls.

As it was, the Weasley's now housed the most unorthodox mishmash of a family, with the building quite close to bursting at the seams. No one ever complained though; Mr. Weasley always seemed too busy with his work to notice the ever-growing crowd and Mrs. Weasley just seemed grateful to have the distraction; as if filling up the bedrooms could fill the empty whole in her heart that Fred's passing had left.

It had become a welcoming piece of normalcy; Having a caring home of family and friends to go back to at the end of the day, knowing that for once in his life he was independent. For the first time Harry was quite literally content with his living arrangements. At least, he had been… until his fight with Ginny.

After the battle both Ron and Harry decided against returning to Hogwarts, taking the jobs that Kingsley had so willingly offered in the Auror department instead. There really hadn't been too much to think about, it was Harry's dream job, and besides, there were still too many Death Eaters running free for him to consider the war a complete victory. What he hadn't expected was Ginny's reaction. She had been furious when he had told her, arguing that he needed to finish school, that he had done his part and it wasn't worth risking his life anymore.

Despite how completely irrational he thought she was being he tried to reassure her, tried to tell her that being an Auror would be a piece of pie in comparison to Voldemort. It hadn't been enough; in fact nothing he did now seemed to be enough for her. She would constantly scream about his hero-complex, about his blatant disregard to his own life; but it wasn't until the day she demanded he chose between going back to school with her or joining the Aurors that he realized their relationship was over. He gave her her answer and she had ended it. So now the visits to the Burrow were a tad more awkward and bit less often but he had braved it, needing to speak with Ron and Hermione about his newest investigation.

"Two days ago I would have sent the Malfoys off to Azkaban myself." Harry replied to Ron's sudden outburst. "But, I'm afraid things are a bit more complicated now…"

"I don't understand. " Hermione pressed, her eyebrows furrowing in annoyance at his response.

"Narcissa Malfoy has given up a few memories. They kind of shed a different light on Draco…" Ron snorted.

"It's his mother, like anything she gives would be considered evidence."

"You know the Ministry can confirm if a memory is authentic. " Hermione chided before turning back to Harry. "I'm assuming you can't tell us what the memory was?" Merlin no. He could just imagine what the Malfoys would do to him if he told Hermione. Forget Ron who they considered a blood-traitor, but _Hermione. _Besides Kingsley had made it clear that he didn't want anyone else involved. Surely they could understand that.

"No. Sorry." Harry watched the mounting frustration on Ron's face. If anything he had hated Draco more than Harry had. The very idea that the Malfoy's were anything more than a family of backstabbing cowards was laughable.

"Well, obviously it was enough to leave some sort of impression on you." Hermione said thoughtfully before Ron could argue. "Is it enough to keep them out of Azkaban?"

"I honestly don't know. I've only just agreed to the case yesterday, and I've only seen one memory. Right now it's not enough to say one way or another it's just… it wasn't what I was expecting." Merlin was that an understatement, but he wasn't sure how to convey the significance of the memory without telling them all about it.

"It's sort of like sixth year all over again isn't it?" Hermione mused. "With you obsessing over him…"

"I did not obsess over him!" Harry cried indignantly, his face reddening as she merely grinned back. Okay, maybe he had, but like hell he would say that out loud. It's not as if he had _wanted_ to do it. Just like he didn't want to have anything to do with him now. But she continued to smile, annoyance causing his ears to burn uncomfortably. "Besides I was right about him then too wasn't I?" He demanded, hoping that she wouldn't comment on his embarrassment. Instead, she nodded with that stupid grin which was worse.

"Look." He turned to Ron instead, not able to meet Hermione's bemused gaze. "The memory just… well, he wasn't acting at all like we were used to. I almost felt… sorry for him."

"Bloody Hell Harry. It's Malfoy we're talking about!"

"Yeah, exactly. Which is why the memory doesn't make sense!" He ignored Ron's hurt look and sighed into his tea, glad for the momentary fog on his glasses to give him a second to collect his thoughts. This would all be so much easier to explain if they had seen it…

"All you have to do is tell the truth at the trial right?" He nodded. "You can do that without biasness Harry. Tell them what you saw. It's really very simple." Simple? Simple? Merlin no, it wasn't simple at all, but he knew he couldn't explain why so he kept his mouth shut.

"Why isn't the bastard in Azkaban already anyways?" Ron asked suddenly, causing Hermione's annoyed gaze to flick to him.

"Ronald! You're an Auror. How can you not _know_?"

"I know they took him and his mother to St. Mungos after the battle but I never followed up on them… It's Malfoy!" He whined defensively, looking towards Harry for help.

"He's been in a coma since the battle." He explained. "They were waiting for him to wake up to have the trial but he hasn't shown any signs of recovery."

"Well, serves him right then." Hermione shot him another glare as they began to argue about his lack of empathy. Harry ignored the bickering, his mind drifting back to the pensieve and Draco's crying face. _"I c-can't kill him. I don't _want_ to…" _Did he really deserve this? It _was_ Draco Malfoy. The boy who had condemned Buckbeak. The boy who cursed Katie, who poisoned Ron, who called Hermione a mudblood, who… lowered his wand…

"What are you two arguing about now?" Harry started at the voice, turning in his chair to watch as Ginny descended the stairs, her smile faltering as she caught his gaze. "Oh. Hi. Harry…" Both Hermione and Ron fell silent to watch the scene, shooting nervous glances at one another.

"Hey Gin. Doing alright?" He asked casually, trying to keep his voice as calm as possible. It was, at the very least, an improvement from last time. No watery eyes, no sniffling… by golly he was almost cheerful! Ha! See, he could be civil. No matter that she had ripped his heart out and stomped on it….

"Yeah." She said hoarsely, her eyes darting away from him as she turned her head and stalked over to the sink, busying herself by filling a glass of water. "You?" She asked with her back towards him.

"Great. Thanks." Yes, great. Fabulous! He looked back at Ron's sympathetic gaze and then down at his teacup, suddenly becoming entranced with the little painted flowers on the saucer.

"Where are you off to Ginny?" Hermione chirped in a not so subtle attempt in steering the conversation to one less awkward.

"Just out." Was the distant reply as Ginny turned back to the group. "Going to pick up my new books for this year." Narrowed eyes again fell on Harry but he didn't dare look away from her accusing glare. He would be damned if she thought he should feel guilty about his decision. She had been the one to brake off their relationship, she had demanded that he choose between her and his job. No, he wouldn't back down this time. He hadn't done anything wrong!

Hermione was suddenly on her feet, walking over to Ginny to lay a hand on her shoulder. "So you're going to Diagon Ally? I forgot to pick up some new inkwells and quills for this year. Would you mind bringing some back for me?"

Bright brown eyes flashed in anger, fixating themselves on Hermione's consoling hand before traveling up to her face. A minute passed in absolute silence and then Ginny nodded, ignoring everyone else as she glided to the fireplace, her face the same dark color as her hair. "Sure _Hermione_." She finally snapped before disappearing into the green flames.

"Bloody Hell. She's terrifying!" Ron whistled, wincing sympathetically at Harry.

"Ron! That's your sister!" Hermione scolded as she returned to her seat. There was no real anger in her nagging however, only concern.

"Yeah, which is why I can say she's acting like an utter crackpot." Harry couldn't help but smile at that. When he and Ginny had first broken up his biggest fear was that his relationship with Ron would take a turn for the worst. Surprisingly however, not only had Ron agreed with Harry, he constantly berated Ginny for her decision.

"Ron…"

"What?" He turned to Hermione in all seriousness. "Come on Mione, I became an Auror too and you didn't freak out. Harry is keeping people safe, what does she have to cry about?"

"Of course Harry's decisions are admirable but you two have to understand what she's feeling. He was absent all through last school year while we were together Ronald. She spent an entire year worrying about him, not knowing if he was even alive and then after he defeats Voldemort; just when she thinks that the two of them have a time for a normal relationship, he chooses to join the Aurors to hunt down Death Eaters."

"Well what the bloody hell did she expect when she started dating Harry Potter?" Ron reasoned, causing Hermione to roll her eyes.

"Look, Hermione, I do understand." Harry cut in before she could respond. "Really. I get it but she needs to understand too… If I let them go free, then I haven't won Hermione, not at all. If I don't find the rest of the Death Eaters and stop them from hurting people then all our friends died in vain. I defeated one wizard, not his army. I'm trying to protect her as well as everyone else… and if Ginny can't understand how important this is then we obviously weren't meant to be together in the first place."

Hermione stared sadly down at the table, ignoring Ron's nods of approval. Harry sighed. This isn't what he had come here for. He didn't want to talk about Ginny , she already took up too much of his thoughts, but he was also quite sure he wasn't going to get anymore advice about Draco either. It was time to leave so he finished the last of his lukewarm tea in one gulp and stood. "Look, thanks guys, but I have to go now." Hermione's worried face shot back to him however as she moved around the table to grip his forearm, apologetic eyes near tears.

"I'm sorry Harry. Please don't leave. I didn't mean to-"

He smiled warmly at her, laying a gentle hand over hers in reassurance. There was no reason for her to be sorry, he understood perfectly. She was about to be married into the family, it was unfair to ask her to choose a side between her best friend and soon to be sister-in-law. And the truth was, he didn't really mind if she had agreed with her, perhaps he hadn't given Ginny the attention she deserved after all. But being an Auror felt _right_, and as his gut feeling had not betrayed him before, he wasn't about to question it now. "No, it's not that." He said gently. "I'm working tonight. Kingsley wants me back in his office for some training." Relief flashed across her face only to be replaced with a frown a moment later.

"For the record though Harry. I do think Ginny is going about this all wrong." Well, he couldn't help fee l a little smug about _that_.

"Thanks Mione. That means a lot." And it did. He didn't have much experience in relationships, Cho having been the only other interest he had ever had and _that_ hadn't ended quite the way he was hoping either. Hearing from another female that he wasn't _entirely _at fault was much more reassuring than hearing it from Ron. "Really though, I do have to leave now. I need to stop at St. Mungo's before I go to the Ministry."

"You're going to see Malfoy?" Ron asked as he too stood and joined them. Harry nodded solemly. He was, after all, investigating the case. He would have to go snooping into the blonde's life rather soon… Maybe seeing him would make him feel less guilty about that. Besides, he was sure Narcissa would be with her son and he needed to speak with her as well. "You want me to go with you?"

Harry inwardly winced at that. As much as he appreciated Ron wanting to help, he couldn't imagine that Narcissa would be very happy to see him in her son's hospital room. He quickly shook his head.

"No thanks, but I'll let you know how it goes." With a swift hug from Hermione and a reassuring nod from Ron, Harry stepped into the fireplace, the flo powder scattering around him as he shouted for St. Mungos.

XXX

Harry glanced nervously about as he came upon the reception desk of the seventh floor, all his senses heightened in preparation for the horde of screaming fans that usually accompanied any of his outings. The worry was short lived however as the tired eyes of the nurses glimpsed over him vaguely before falling back down to the charts of patients. The few visitors who were sitting in the small waiting room seemed too tired or worried to even look at him which worked out perfectly as he nodded his way into the adjoining hallway.

Kingsley had given him Draco's room number. Not that it would have been hard to find. There weren't many private rooms that came equipped with its own personal sentry.

"You must be Mr. Potter?" The Auror asked as Harry drew closer. He was short, shorter than Harry but what he lacked in height he made up with his unusually wide girth. How someone could look so incredibly stout was beyond Harry's comprehension. Merlin he could probably lift Hagrid with relative ease. But his eyes were kind, brown hair beginning to whiten over the weathering face.

"You're Auror Thompson?" Harry asked as he held his hand out for his senior to take.

"Argon. Call me Argon!" The man beamed, shaking Harry with so much force that his teeth were rattling as he pulled away. "You're here on the Malfoy case are ya?" Harry nodded, gripping his now aching fingers to his chest as subtly as he could.

"I-Is it alright if I see him?" Harry asked as he willed the tears of pain away. Thank Merlin Thompson worked for the Ministry and not against them. He would be deadly even without magic.

"Course ya can! His mother was here but she left with Donnie. She'll be back in a bit but you don't have to worry, both of the Malfoys have had their wands confiscated. Just need the password." Harry grinned to himself. Kingsley was working hard in cleaning up the Ministry and weeding out any questionable characters but until all the Death Eaters were captured the Aurors still took every precaution they could with one another. Assigning daily passwords and security questions was a norm.

"Newtsickles." Harry replied and Argon nodded, turning to open the door for him.

"I'll be here in case ya need anything." Harry thanked him quietly as he entered the private room, his eyes darting over the scarce furnishings. A chair, a roll away table… and then his eyes flickered to the only other occupant there.

A wave of nausea washed over him. He didn't like Draco, he had _never _liked him; since their first meeting at the sorting ceremony... Such a deep animosity had grown between them over the years that it was almost palpable; but never had Harry wished to see him like _this._

An I.V tube was connected to the blond's pale arm, purple-blue veins jutting precariously against the stretched skin. He was thinner now than he had been in Narcissa's memory, thinner than anyone should be. Harry winced at the site as he eyes traveled from the withered forearm to the bony wrist. Dear god, his wrists… He gasped, willing himself to look away from the skeleton-like hand and focus on the all too narrow face.

Like the rest of his body, his face was hollow, the purple around his eyes contrasted dramatically with the pastel color of his skin. His thin lips were tinged a ghoulish shade of blue, the same color as the veins that lay outlined against the tautness of his cheeks and neck. But it was his hair that was the most shocking. Golden locks flitted across the ghostly figure, resting on his pillow like a halo. It was unnerving how _healthy_ it looked, as if it was the only thing left alive in the maltreated body, drinking the nutrients he was in such desperate need of. The platinum strands thrived around him, long and thick, reaching outward past his cheekbones.

It was as if Draco was sending one last tantalizing message; that he was still alive. Barely, mercilessly, but alive nonetheless. "Always had to have the last word didn't you Malfoy?" Harry whispered, almost expecting those bright grey eyes to glare back at him. They didn't.

Harry wasn't sure what he had been hoping for when he decided to visit Malfoy. Maybe he had thought that seeing the face that taunted him for so many years would drive the old fire back. Maybe he was hopping to feel immediate hatred, to give Narcissa one more reason to call him off the case; but now, as he stood above him, Harry only felt pity towards his old school rival.

"You came, Mr. Potter." Harry spun around, not having heard Narcissa enter the room. He reached for his wand, pointing it warningly at her as he backed further from the door, his mind thinking up a million different spells when he remembered… She didn't have her wand. Even if she had, both her hands were currently employed; one holding a dark satin bag and the other -much to Harry's immediate surprise-a muggle coffee thermos. What the hell?

Narcissa looked at him warily her eyes studying his wand with distrust. A long moment passed in silence as she seemed to way her options. It's not as if she would attack him but he did expect her to back away, or at least ask him to pocket his wand… He hadn't however expected her to cock her head curiously to the side for moment and then turn to Draco, dismissing him completely.

Harry stood there, dumbfounded as she walked around the bed, the insufferable mask of hers in place as she laid the contents on the little table. It was, at the least, a little insulting. He had killed Voldemort after all… Surely that warranted him enough of a reputation that instilled _caution_. And yet there she stood, straightening Draco's already impeccable linens, as if Harry was no more dangerous than a child with a toy stick. "Since you're here, I'm assuming Kingsley told you of my conditions?"

Her voice drifted lazily to him. It was enough to snap his gawking mouth shut. Frowning in confusion he did lower his wand, only a fraction… So she may not be able to use a killing curse at the moment, she however had lived in a house full of Death Eaters. Armed or not she was still dangerous.

"I wanted to hear them from you." He said darkly. Narcissa chose to ignore his clipped voice as she sat down on the chair, her lithe figure leaning slightly forward to take Draco's bony fingers in her hands.

"As I've said, I will give up mine and Draco's memories as long as you are the one investigating the case." She didn't even look at Harry. Her cold eyes focused on the blond's face, calm and calculating. If this was some sort of motherly affection Harry wasn't very impressed. She looked almost _bored_… Only the small movement of her thumb gently stroking the back of her son's hand showed any sort of care.

"Why me?"

"Because you will tell the truth." What kind of bloody lame excuse-! He sighed inwardly, barely able to contain the urge to roll his eyes. Oh yes, because he was bloody Saint Potter. Honestly! His next words came out in an impatient hiss.

"Since Kingsley has become the Minister things have changed. All the Aurors are trustworthy. Surely there is someone else more suited-"

" Please Mr. Potter, don't insult me." Her eyes flashed up to him at last. "He's a Death Eater. No one will care about giving him a fair trial. Draco was condemned the moment he got the Dark Mark and you and I both know it. My point in asking _you_-"

"I know what your point is. But what makes you so sure? I lost people in the war just like everyone else. Friends, family, people who I loved and cared for. All because of the things that you, and your son, and your husband and all the other Death Eaters did! What makes you think that I won't send the both of you to Azkaban the minute I'm able?"

Merlin where did that come from? He bit his lip, instantly regretting the words the moment they left his mouth. He hadn't felt this angry since his mind games with Voldemort. Could he really do that? Could he really disregard their case so easily? He knew she was right; a majority of the Aurors had lost family in the wars. No one had sympathy for Death Eaters. No one would really take the case seriously, no matter what the memories portrayed, as long as one more of the dark followers were behind bars...

Narcissa's face was still impassive as she assessed him with her cold eyes, her voice eerily calm.

"I know you won't, because I know the type of person you are and you value justice far more than you value revenge" He had nothing to say to that as she returned her gaze to her son. She was right. Damn it, she was right… "I'm not looking for pity, or forgiveness." She continued. "Just the truth. Just for him. Put me in Azkaban if you must but Draco's not at fault for any of this. My actions were of my own free will, his were for survival. You can't condemn him for that." Like hell he couldn't!

"There's evidence." Harry argued angrily. "He wasn't under the Imperius Curse. He had a choice-"

"He didn't have a choice!" Before he could respond she was standing before him, her eyes burning with the same fierceness that she had shown in her memory. Harry's fingers tightened subconsciously around his wand and for the first time since he had met her, he was the slightest bit afraid. "He never had a choice! The moment he was born, his fate was sealed!" She hissed dangerously. "He had no more choice in being a Death Eater than you did with being a Savior. I belong in Azkaban! My son does not!"

She turned from him, crossing her arms around herself as she walked over to the window. She was crumbling all over again, he couldn't see her expression but she looked as if she was trying to physically hold herself together. "You don't have to believe me now." She replied evenly, her voice barely audible in the distance between them. "You have my memories and you'll have his, and then you'll see… There was never a choice."

"What do you mean you belong in Azkaban?" For a moment he didn't think she would answer and then she gripped the curtain fiercely. Was she shaking?

"Watch the memories." He was quiet for a long moment, his eyes flickering back to Draco. Merlin, with the blond's eyes closed and the fierce smirk gone he looked almost peaceful… Harry had only known Draco's cruelty and anger, was there more? For him or his mother? He didn't want this, even less now that he had heard her piece; but if he didn't… If he refused, Draco and Narcissa would go to Azkaban. The Death Eaters would be free… What if they weren't guilty… What if… Merlin… He had lowered his wand!

"You realize what this means?" He asked as calmly as he could, watching her petite outline against the window. "Everything you give us is free reign. You will have to testify any time a memory is used… You'll be considered a traitor by the Death Eaters-" He was giving her a chance to back out because Merlin knew he couldn't. Not now. He saw her hesitate. She didn't want to, no more than he did, but finally her head dipped forward.

"So be it."

"I can't promise that my word will sway anyone." He was nearly begging! Just choose someone else! Anyone else… " I can't promise that what I say will keep him free or imprison him-"

"I understand." She said briskly.

"I won't lie!" He pressed desperately. He didn't want to be the deciding factor! He couldn't be responsible for the death of anyone else… Merlin not again… "I c-can't lie. You saved my life, I owe you a debt but I won't _lie_ to the Ministry."

"I know." Did she? Did she really understand what she was asking? He sighed in defeat, watching Draco's chest rise and fall against the white linen, looking more and more like a ghost the longer Harry stared. It was unfair but it was his last chance…

"He'll hate you for this." Harry finally whispered, watching her back loose it's will, her shoulders slumping, the curtain all but forgotten as her arms fell limply down to her sides.

"Yes." She agreed weakly. "Yes, He will."

**Don't forget to R and R. **


	3. Narcissa Malfoy: The Manor

**I wanted to thank everyone for taking the time to read my story. I hope I can continue to keep your interest. I had a fun time going into Legilimency and putting my own little twist on things since it's not explained very much throughout the books. I also know that it was Bellatrix and not Voldemort that taught Draco Occlumency and I will make it known to Harry as well later on in the story so please be a little patient on that.**

**So, thank you everyone for the reviews, favorites and follows. And a special thank you to Wonka's Mistake44 for pointing out the blond/blonde haha. I admit that my grammar is horrible- ironic considering how much I love to write- but your review is incredibly appreciated. Anything that helps me better my writing is always loved and I promise to make the corrections to the last chapters ASAP. Thank you! Thank all of you and I hope you like this chapter! **

"Forgive me Mr. Potter but you are woeful at this…" Olivia sighed as she stood over Harry, her arms crossed around her chest with a scowl that would have done Mcgonagall proud.

"So I've been told." Harry replied weekly as he struggled up to his feet. It was the third time she had been able to break into his thoughts, prodding and shuffling through his memories as easily as a filling cabinet. Kingsley had hired her to teach Harry Legilimency but so far all he learned was that she was as an unforgiving instructor as Snape had been. "Is this really necessary? I'm supposed to be preforming Legilimency. Why should I practice Occlumency?"

"You can't successfully perform a spell without knowing its effects. Unfortunately we don't have the _time_ to improve on your defense. Thank Merlin Mr. Malfoy is in a comma, I don't believe you'd be able to do it otherwise…" He chose to ignore that. Since his catastrophic lesson with Snape he hadn't bothered with Occlumency again, having seen no point after Voldemort's death. It had been a stupid conclusion of his, especially as he had wanted to be an Auror to begin with.

"We'll get no further with that. Might as well move on." She said irritably. He could only nod in agreement. As much as he wanted to prove that he could do it, the Malfoy trials were drawing closer and he didn't have the time to practice on something that would only benefit himself. "Now. Mr. Malfoy is a trained Occlumens. We can only assume he took lessons from the Dark Lord himself in order to keep their plans under wraps. At the level you're at, you wouldn't even be able to make it a second inside Draco's mind. Fortunately, as he is in a comma, he has no way in blocking you. The most important thing you must learn at the moment is focusing on relevant memories."

He watched as she began to pace, her wand held loosely in one hand with the other pressed thoughtfully against her chin. Her dark brown eyes ignored him, her mind clearly elsewhere. Harry waited as he looked her over. Her brown-graying hair was pulled back into a ponytail, her tall, thin body hidden beneath dark purple robes. She had been pretty when she was younger, that much he was certain, but now she was easily the most feared women in the Ministry with her short temper and quick tongue.

When Harry was told that it was Olivia who would be training him he almost opted out of the whole investigation. Standing before her now, he wished that he had.

"…You will see his entire life but you must learn how to pick out only the memories we_ need_. Understood?" No. But he nodded anyways. "Well, I suppose the best way for you to learn would be to try." She finally faced him, her nose scrunched up as if she had smelled something rotten. "I will… let you see a memory. _Let_." She emphasized. "Understand this, no one else, is ever going to just let you stroll on through their memories so don't go thinking you're going to have it as easy.

"A persons mind is nothing to play around with. Even by wizarding standards, it is a sacred place and the entire act of another person entering it goes against nature. Your own body will try to reject it so you have to be prepared." Prepared? How the bloody hell- "Now, ready your wand."

He sighed, not feeling the least bit confident. "When you're ready…" As if he was ever going to be ready… He was already exhausted from the three failed attempts at blocking her out, now he was supposed to be pushing himself_ in_? Sighing he stared back into her chocolate brown eyes and shouted 'Legilimens!'

One moment he was standing in the training room at the Ministry and the next he's met with a flashing torrent of multi-colored images. Pictures rushed forward, faces of people he didn't know, a plethora of voices, noises, a dog bark, a broom, the rush of wind against his face, the twinge of a spell hitting him in the chest…

His feet were planted firmly on… _something_… but he was moving forward in a stream of memories. He caught sight of Olivia, a hundred different Olivia's. A baby with brown wisps of hair, Olivia dressed in her graduating Hogwarts robes, Olivia as a teenager, Olivia picking up a wand… And then the rushing stopped, he froze, the flashing colors materializing into a large courtyard.

He was standing behind rows of white chairs; a red carpet separating them into two columns and leading forward towards a covered archway. He was outside, in a garden maybe? Clouds were darkening above him although it went unnoticed by the grinning wedding guests. The groom was already at the altar, a young man with long brown hair, a beaming face… And then there was Olivia. Harry barely had time to look over her stunning pearl white gown. He had been right… She had been beautiful…

He blinked, looking at her and then he was looking_ from_ her… It was the most disconcerting feeling, his body seeming to phase through her, with her… They were walking forward, looking at the altar in… happiness? Merlin, Harry had never felt the utter feeling of joy that was bursting through her… Through him? It was an odd collaboration, her feelings molding into his. Her goose bumps rushing up his arms and neck, the twinge of her high heels making his toes curl in discomfort…

It was alarming to say the least, but he couldn't deny the joy that her happiness was causing him. The cold, wetness of her tears slid slowly down his face and he reached up to wipe away nothing… The groom reached out for their hand as they drew closer, his eyes shining in adoration as they took it, and Olivia's heart swelled, never looking away from the young handsome face-

"That's enough." Harry gasped as he was ripped from her, his body aching as the memories slipped backwards, further and further away and he was again standing in the Ministry. Gasping, he felt his legs buckle underneath him and his shoulder met the floor. "Speak one word of it and I'll rip your eyes out. Savior or not." She hissed dangerously as he tried to catch his bearings.

"That was-"

"Watch it." She warned and he frowned as he sat up.

"The weirdest thing I ever felt…"

"Of course it is." She snapped in annoyance. "I told you it's unnatural. You are entering into someone's _mind_. There are layers you are passing through." Snape had said that once hadn't he? The mind was layers? "It's different from a pensieve. You're connected to another person here, you share their feelings, their thoughts… Trained Legilimens can manipulate a memory or disconnect their own emotions from the bearer but as it is, we don't have that much time. You'll have to deal with the sensation for the moment... " Now, try it again. This time while I use occlumency."

Was she serious? He was exhausted! He could barely hold his wand... It was too much to take in, he opened his mouth to say so when she shot him a fierce look and he decided against it. What was it that made mind readers so grouchy? He had always thought that Severus was just insensitive but maybe it was him who was just intolerable... Did everyone have this hard of time learning? "Look through any memory other than the one I showed you and I will meddle with your mind until you can no longer tell an owl from a Hippogriff." Olivia warned dangerously. Well... Lovely.

He took a deep breath to try and quell his shaking fingers and then flourished his wand again. This time he knew the image would not find him so he focused on catching the wedding day. His eyes following each rapid picture until he saw it, the archway…

It was like picking out a word from a page, his eyes locking on the image. He tried to enter it, hopping to see the garden and white chairs but after a horrifyingly long moment Harry realized nothing was happening. The archway froze before him, mocking him, beckoning; but as he tried to move, tried to reach for it, something pushed him backwards. An invisible force like a weight against his chest... It didn't hurt but it was draining. His vision suddenly blurred as the weight grew heavier, pressing him away and he stopped trying to push forward, stopped trying to break through the growing mass. With a gasp he retreated, focusing on the room in the Ministry until he was kneeling in front of the present day Olivia.

She did not look impressed. "That was dreadful! I didn't even feel you!" She sounded far away as he shut his eyes and willed the wave of nausea to subside. It was hard to breathe… to sit… He leaned forward, bracing himself against the stone floor as he gasped and trembled. Merlin was it supposed to be this tiring? Olivia sighed above him in disappointment, crossing her arms over her chest with a frown. "This won't do at all…"

"It's hard…" He whined, wincing as she snorted unsympathetically.

"Did you think it would be easy?" Well, actually…

"Easier." He mumbled.

"Your mind is weak! How you were able to defeat the Dark Lord without him reading every spell you cast is beyond my comprehension." She snapped. If only she had known what Voldemort had done to his mind… He wasn't about to tell her that though. "Well then, on your feet. You'll try again.-"

"I don't think I can-"

"You don't have much of a choice. The trials are in a few weeks. You need as much practice as you can get if you're going to delve into his mind and back with enough information for the jury."

"I'm tired… If I could just have a rest-"

"No time. On your feet Mr. Potter!" Well this was oddly familiar. It's a shame she hadn't known Snape, Harry had a feeling they would have gotten along quite well. He stood on wobbly legs, his arms feeling like weights against his sides. "Raise your wand! Now, when you're ready…"

XXX

It was six when Harry was finally able to make it to Kingsley's office. After four more useless attempts with Legilimency, a late lunch and a forty-five minute nap in his office, he was finally going to be able to watch another of Narcissa's memories.

It had been an exhausting day, his whole body ached from the mental exercises but he was determined to get through another vial tonight. Olivia had been right; the trials were in a few weeks. He didn't have much time to get a case together, whether it would be to save or condemn the mother and son.

Kingsley wasn't in his office when Harry knocked, but the lock turned and the door swung open at his presence. With a grin Harry slipped into the room, turning the lamps on with a quick flick of his wrists he walked over to the stone basin. The vials had been locked in a cabinet above Kingsley's desk but again, as Harry neared the glass doors flung opened. Grabbing the nearest one Harry returned to the pensieve, looking at the black label. _Narcissa Malfoy; The Manor _

Frowning, Harry tipped the contents into the bowl and closed his eyes as he began to sink into the misty abyss.

XXX

"Hurry Draco!" Harry opened his eyes at the sound of Narcissa's panicked whisper. She was pulling her son along by the arm, both Malfoys navigating the darkened hallways with ease. Harry sprinted to keep pace with them, rooms passing by them in a blur as they ran. "This way!" She pressed as they came upon Narcissa's bedroom only for her to release him and dash to the window.

"Don't-" Draco warned but she was already peering behind the material of the drapes, lifting the edge just enough to see through. Harry was right beside her, looking though the slit of fabric to see an army of black cloaks marching towards Malfoy Manor.

"Death Eaters..." Harry mumbled as she dropped the curtain and stumbled backwards.

"W-What is it?"Draco asked in concern.

Her icy blue eyes were wide in fear, her bottom lip trembling as she grabbed his hand again to pull him away. "They're here." She said crisply. Draco didn't reply but Harry could see the color drain from the blond's face.

Without a word they both began running again, their hurried footsteps and heavy breathing was the only noise Harry could make out. Where were the house elves? Lucius?

They came upon the drawing room and Draco moved to grab a porcelain cup of floo powder from the mantle at the same moment that the fireplace burst to life with green flames.

"Run!" Harry shouted, knowing he couldn't be heard as both mother and son skidded to a halt on the tiled floor. Narcissa swept Draco behind herself in the same moment Voldemort appeared before them, Nagini draped around his shoulders like a shawl.

"Narcissa…" The Dark Lord drawled. "You weren't leaving without saying good bye now, were you?"

Harry watched helplessly as Voldemort raised his hand, sending a silent order to the serpent around his neck. With a hiss, Nagini shot forward, coiling around Narcissa's waist in a deadly hold. A scream filled the air as the witch was knocked backwards, rolling across the floor in the scaly bindings; and then his wand was out, pointing at Draco.

No words were spoken but the tell-tale spark of red that hit the blond in the chest was enough for Harry to discern that it was the Cruciatus curse. Draco fell alongside his mother, his body writhing and convulsing; His mouth opened in a silent scream and Harry cringed, knowing far too well the pain that the young Malfoy was experiencing.

"No! P-Please, my lord!" Narcissa shrieked as she watched her son, fighting vainly against Nagini's fierce hold. Another roar of flames was heard and the memory allowed a glimpse of Bellatrix's lithe form moving to stand by Voldemort's side. The female Death Eater glanced over her sister and nephew, a grin spreading over her dark painted lips before she leaned up to whisper something into the Dark Lord's ear.

Harry tried walking closer, hoping to catch some of what was being said between the master and servant pair but Draco's thrashing had sent a vase tumbling down from a bookcase and shattering to the floor. All of Narcissa's attention was now redirected to her son, causing Voldemort and Bellatrix to momentarily disappear amongst the blue and grey mist. "Draco!" She gasped, her face turning an unhealthy shade of red as Nagini's hold tightened.

"Do shut up." Voldemort snapped causing his blurry form to reappear. "You see Narcissa, I've come into a bit of a problem…" He continued in a bored tone although his wand was trembling slightly in his palm, the shivers growing stronger as he kept the curse focused on Draco. "…And I'm afraid it's all on account of your pathetic husband…"

Narcissa stared at him in horror, the veins on her forehead protruding against her scalp. She opened her mouth to reply but no words came out, instead she lay their gaping like a fish out of water. Draco wasn't faring any better. His spasms had receded to small, uncontrollable tremors as if the convulsions were far too much effort. "Stop!" Harry roared as foam bubbled out of the blond's mouth, running down the lean chin. A small shudder, a tiny twitch of the fingers… It was all that showed that he was still alive.

"…First the diary and now the prophecy… Really…" Voldemort sighed disappointedly. "And I had so much hope for the Malfoy household..."

"Stop!" Harry knew better… Knew that nothing would change, that nothing _could _change… But the vacant look on Draco's face… the way Narcissa's thin lips turned blue… It was too much. He drew his wand and sent his own curse at Voldemort's chest, growling in frustration as it flew effortlessly through the pale body and phased into the memory wall.

"…I really have no more need for any of you…" The Dark Lord continued, oblivious to Harry's presence.

Harry watched as Voldemort flourished his wand again. The Cruciatus curse was lifted and a groan escaped Draco's pursed lips. The blond curled inward on himself, cradling his head. He was barely conscious, but it was enough for Vodemort. The Dark Lord strutted over to Draco's side and long pale fingers tangled themselves into the platinum hair to force Draco's gaze onto his mother. Merlin no...

"You may enjoy your dinner now." Who...? Harry's eyes followed Draco's and he felt a wave of nausea as Nagini let out a hiss of appreciation to her master.

"No!" Draco gasped. He tried to move, tried to reach out to her but large twin fangs sank into the pale flesh of Narcissa's thin neck.

"Bastard!" Harry screamed, watching the pain flittering over the witch's face. Tears welled over Narcissa's eyes, streaming down flushed cheeks. "Stop!"

"M-My l-lord…" Draco's voice drew everyone's gaze. Merlin he looked like he was going to faint... If it wasn't for Voldemort holding his head up maybe he would have... Harry watched Draco try and form a coherent sentence, the curse had caused his words to slur but he willed himself to continue, even after he was dropped unceremoniously to the floor. Voldemort stared at him in disgust as the blond push himself to his knees. He winced in pain, his trembling body bracing against the tile. "M-My father-"

"Quiet Draco!" Bellatrix barked but Voldemort raised his hand to silence her.

"Your father?" The Dark Lord pressed.

"I ask forgiveness in my Father's stead. He _has _proven you useless b-but surely, w-we can serve you." Draco replied in a rush of air. Merlin no... This isn't how it was supposed to have happened... It wasn't supposed to be this hard... Draco was never supposed to sound this fucking broken... Harry couldn't stop the tears falling past his cheeks. They had tried to run away... They hadn't wanted it... They were running away...

A low chuckle reverberated through the room. Voldemort turned laughing. _Laughing_! His cloak flourishing behind as he glided over to one of the leather chairs. With a smirk he motioned to Nagini and the snake untangled itself from Narcissa's crumbled body. "Serve me?" Voldemort mused, turning to face Bellatrix who, for the first time since the memory began, was in plain view. "What do you think Bella? They are your family after all…"

Bellatrix grinned at her sister and nephew, dark eyes shining mischievously. She strode to Draco, slipping her long fingers under his chin and cackled. "Draco does go to Hogwarts my lord… He will be able to keep an eye on Potter if nothing else… He is a clever boy."

"Yes… Such a handsome boy…" Voldemort mused. "He could prove useful yet…" Draco's already blanched face paled at the words but he didn't dare look away from the Dark Lord who was now stroking the Nagini's head. "...And your sister?"

Black eyes met blue as Narcissa propped herself on her elbow to stare at Bellatrix. "I think…" Bellatrix giggled. "..That she'll be very eager to show you her worth and loyalty my lord." Voldemort cocked his head to the side to regard both Malfoys.

"Yes… I dare say you're right…" With a smirk he motioned to the front doors. "Bring in the others. I think this manor will work well for now... We were looking for adequate lodging." He regarded Narcissa again, grinning as she had yet to sit up. "You don't have a problem with that, do you Narcissa?"

"N-No my lord…" She whispered, her thin hand clutching at her chest while the other cradled her torso. She was having trouble to breathe, Harry had enough medical training to know that her ribs were probably broken; but her eyes were again on Draco who looked as if he was ready to collapse at any moment.

"Excellent." Voldemort beamed, clapping his hands as Bellatrix went to invite the other Death Eaters inside. "Oh Narcissa…" He drawled, drawing her fearful gaze once more. All traces of amusement had dissapeared, his dark eyes narrowed dangerously. "Don't ever disappoint me again."

Narcissa forced herself to her knees, her head bowed to the floor. There were tears in her proud eyes and Harry wasn't sure if it was from the pain or fear but she grit her teeth and nodded. "Yes, my lord."


	4. Narcissa Malfoy: Hellena and Astoria

**This is the longest chapter I have ever written for a fanfic so consider it a holiday gift. I had so much that I needed to introduce because I really wanted to incorporate Ron and Hermione's wedding. Also, I've wanted to write something about Astoria since the Greengrass family is very rarely mentioned… I felt it was important, I mean, this is the woman Draco married and we know so little about her. I'll go into her and Draco's relationship a lot more later in the story so I hope you all enjoy her as much as I do.**

**And a side note, sorry if Fleur's speech isn't exactly correct. All I remember is there are a lot of v sounds in her English accent.**

**Anyways. Thank you all for the favorites and follows and please don't be shy to leave a review. Any kind of feedback is helpful to know if I'm doing well in keeping your interest. I hope you enjoy this chapter!**

Harry stood at the large kitchen window, starring out at the setting sun as pink and purple rays bathed across the yard. It was evening at the Burrow, and the cool breeze from the sudden downpour caused a shiver to run down his spine.

"Harry?"

He sighed, leaning his elbows against the windowpane as his mind wandered back to the previous night and the last memory he had watched. He still couldn't get over the initial shock. How could he have thought that the Malfoys had gotten through the war completely unscathed? Of course he had known Voldemort had been furious with Lucius after the fiasco at the Ministry… Dumbledore had said so himself… Lucius was probably relieved to be in Azkaban… The fact was, Harry had never thought about the price that Naricssa and Draco would pay for his failure…

"Harry."

Sure, had had seen glimpses of the punishments Draco endured when Voldemort was angry but it was further into the war and Harry had assumed that they had joined the Death Eaters freely… Now he wasn't so sure. It had been obvious that they were trying to escape. Obvious that Draco had offered his loyalty to save his mother's life… Merlin he couldn't be mad at the blond for _that_. Could he?

Harry!"

No. Draco had been a cruel person even before the war… Everything he had done to Neville, Ron, Hermione… Himself? Okay, so maybe he didn't freely join the Death Eaters… He didn't try to stop them, right? He let them in the school! _But he wouldn't give me away… _He tried to kill Dumbledore! _But he lowered his wand… _

Merlin… who the hell was Draco Malfoy?

"Oi! HARRY!" Harry turned just in time to move out of the way from the Exploding Whizz Poppers that George sent at him. Fireworks spluttered form their case, blooming into a chaotic flower of sparks and colors that whirled across the kitchen. Harry jumped backwards as one firework shot at his face and Hermione and Ron doubled over in laughter from the other side of the room.

Goerge was grinning as the fireworks bounced off pots and pans, shooting under the table, darting out the window, and then all four pairs of eyes watched one shoot up the stairs. A loud shriek caused the amused faces to falter, and then Mrs. Weasley was thundering towards them from the second floor.

"George Weasley!" She roared and Harry couldn't help his own grin as the red head cursed and darted out the door. "Get back here this instant!" Molly shouted as she took off after him, sending a disapproving look at Ron before she bolted outside in hot pursuit. This time Harry joined in with his two best friends as they fell into fits of laughter.

"George better hope she doesn't get ahold of him this time." Ron chuckled, struggling to catch his breath before looking curiously at Harry. "Oi, what were you doing at the widow mate?"

"Huh?" Oh. "Sorry… Was just thinking." He muttered. Hermione was all seriousness again as she looked him over.

"Harry… it's about the Malfoy case isn't it?" He frowned. Of course Hermione would notice. He supposed he _was_ acting a bit odd lately… It was too late to deny it now at any rate, so he nodded.

"Yeah…"

"Are you alright? I haven't seen you like this for a while…" _Since the war._ The unsaid words caused Harry to swallow thickly and stare out the window again. It was too close to the truth… Watching these memories… Being around Narcissa and Draco… It felt like he was still there…

"Sorry… I can't really tell you much… It's just… unsettling to watch." He whispered and a solemn silence fell between them.

"Harry… You can always back out." Ron said unhelpfully. Harry shrugged and forced a smile that wasn't reassuring to either one of his friends.

"It'll be fine... Hey, where's Bill and Fleur?"

Ron didn't look at all convinced but he knew Harry wanted a change of topic so he answered. "They should be here any second… Still can't believe Mom wanted everyone here for a Wednesday night dinner…"

Hermione pulled out a chair and sat down with a sigh. "It's to formally announce our engagement. I know it is…"

"Come on Mione. Mom doesn't follow those pureblood customs. She's just lonely now that Fred… It's just lonely for her…" Harry winced and hurried to steer the conversation away from the missing twin… It was an unspoken rule not to mention Fred in front of Molly and George but his name would instantly bring up a waterfall of tears from everyone in the Burrow.

"Why is announcing your engagement bad?" Harry asked. "I mean… everyone knows already, right?"

Hermione nodded worriedly, her eyebrows disappearing into the mess of her hair. "Well… Yes. It's just… You know… Fleur will be here…"

"I thought… Well… I thought you guys liked her now?"

"Oh no! I mean, I do! We all do! Of course! It's just… Well. Her and Molly both still have very different... _tastes_, and I know both are going to want to_ help_ me in wedding plans…" Ah. Harry gave her a sympathetic look and sat down at the table as well.

A loud 'crack' drew everyone's attention to the window and smiles enveloped the trio as Percy and Arthur apperated inside the Burrow's wards. Bill and Fleur followed them a few moments later and suddenly the front door opened to admit the majority of the Weasley family.

Greetings commenced, the Burrow filling with laughter and hugs as Molly and George returned from outside and Charlie arrived from work. Ginny was the last one to show up by floo, barely acknowledging Harry or Ron as the food was set on the table and everyone took their seats.

"Harry! I didn't see you around today!" Arthur grinned, pilling on a large slice of shepherd's pie onto his plate as the family settled into their dinner routine.

"Ah, no sir. It was my day off." Harry replied cheerfully, passing a plate to Ron and ignoring the angry snort of disapproval from Ginny.

"Good! Good. You seem like you need a break! Kingsley has you on the Malfoy case yeah?" Harry nodded, trying to shrug off the tightening of his chest that seemed to be associated with the Malfoy name. He didn't want to think about them now.

"You will not go back to school Arry?" Fleur asked casually, seemingly oblivious to the awkward silence that followed. Merlin Ginny looked ready to Crucio him, her hand squeezing her fork so tightly her knuckles were turning white.

"Er, no. I'm working at the Ministry now." Bill sent an apologetic shrug to those who looked his way and nearly buried his face into his plate.

"Ah! Zat is not surprising!" Fleur beamed. "Ron is working zere too!-" Realization seemed to filter as her shinning eyes fell on Hermione who cringed. "Zat reminds me! Ven is the wedding?"

"Oh! Uh, I haven't really picked a day… It will have to be after the school year-"

"You will ave it at ze cottage yes? It iz by the ocean, and I will be glad to elp with ze arrangements!" Fleur beamed.

"Oh… That's awfully nice of you but-"

"Actually, I thought you two would have it here?" Molly cut in quickly, her eyes shining a challenge. "I mean, he is my youngest son and _your_ wedding was here." Ah, this is what Hermione had meant… Harry may have felt a little more sympathetic if the alternative conversation wouldn't of had Ginny trying to dismember him before dessert.

"Yes, which iz vy I thought they could ave it at ze cottage. You would not ave a thing to worry about. You deserve a break." Fleur replied in her charming voice although Molly seemed to have taken her comment as an insult nonetheless.

"I'm not so old yet that I can't arrange a wedding." Heads bowed simultaneously around the table in a sorry attempt to hide from the glaring females. The tension was suffocating…

"Ermione, where do you vant the wedding?" Fleur hissed in obvious annoyance and every one turned to watch Hermione's face blanch in horror.

She was near tears, her body sinking into the back of her chair, looking like she wanted nothing more than to disappear into the panels of wood. "I-I…" She stuttered, her voice cracking… Damn.

"Actually." Harry jumped in, cursing his own weak will as all eyes were now on him. "I had already spoken to Hermione… I'm sorry. I asked her weeks ago if she wanted to have the wedding at Grimmauld place." Molly and Fleur looked at him in surprise and the entire table let out a breath of relief.

"Grimmauld place?" Molly said in mild disbelief. "But it's so…"

"Ugly." Fleur admitted. It was the first thing her and Molly seemed to agree on. Harry felt his face flush. Fleur had visited the place only once and had made it blatantly clear what she had thought of it.

"Well, I'll have almost a year to fix it up and the garden will look great with an extension charm and flowers… I should have thought to ask you first but Sirius liked Hermione and Ron so much, I just thought…"

It was unfair, using Sirius as a scapegoat. In fact, Harry was sure his godfather would never have thought that it was adequate for any kind of reception. Sirius had hated Grimmauld more than anyone and now here Harry was, practically forcing his best friends to have the biggest day of their lives in the same gloomy house that even_ he_ tried to get away from.

Hermione and Ron didn't seem to care however as they beamed thankfully at him, giving him small nods of encouragement and acceptance to his offer behind Molly and Fleur's back. It wasn't however, a total lie, as Sirius did like the two, and he always seemed happier when more people were there. Molly seemed to agree, for she sighed in defeat.

"Of course, if Hermione already agreed to it…"

"I'm sorry Molly." Hermione said gently. "I really wasn't thinking. Sirius had just been so happy when we were there for Christmas and I thought he would have enjoyed a wedding if he were still here."

Harry couldn't help but feel slightly guilty. When had it become so easy for them to lie?

Molly finally nodded. "Of course, there is nothing to apologize for. And don't you worry about a thing Harry!" She chirped. "I'll help you get the place in tip-top shape!" Oh god... No.

"I didn't-"

"And I vill help!" Fleur offered with just as much enthusiasm.

"I don't -"

"We vill have to start soon. It vill need a lot of work!" Fleur said, disregarding Harry to turn to Molly. Only this time they were grinning at each other, huddling together to exchange giggles about the new wall color and how they were going to get rid of the large portrait.

Merlin, what had he done? He looked from Ron and Hermione's sympathetic faces to those of Arthur and Charlie. Even Ginny seemed to feel a little bad for him as the words 'garlands of flowers' and 'pink carpets' were thrown carelessly between the two.

XXX

"I'm sorry Harry." Hermione said for the fifth time as they stood before the fireplace. The trio were the only ones left who hadn't gone to bed or returned home and Harry had been dreading the moment all night for multiple reasons. The first being that it was the last time he would see Hermione before she left for Hogwarts; The other being that he was afraid they would bring up his odd behavior again.

"I'm the one who decided your wedding location without consulting you." He said apologetically.

"You know damn well we would have had it at the Shrieking Shack if it meant not having those two duel it out." Ron chuckled. "Why don't you stay Harry, it's past midnight and Ginny will still be asleep when you leave in the morning."

"Thanks mate but I actually wanted to go home and watch another memory. Kingsley let me take the pensieve to Grimmauld." Hermione frowned at this.

"It can't wait until tomorrow?" He shook his head.

"I wanted to see Narcissa again tomorrow and then I have training with Olivia."

"Bloody hell, don't you think you're working a bit too much for a trainee?"

"I'm _not_ dropping the case Ron." Harry snapped irritably causing Ron to raise his hands up in surrender. "Sorry. I'm sorry. I'm just tired." Both of them nodded, unconvinced, so he tried changing the subject. "I'm sorry I won't be there to see you off Hermione."

"Nonsense. It's just the train. You just take care of yourself. And don't let Mrs. Weasley and Fleur push you around. Tell them you have to ask me before you agree to anything alright?" He smiled, knowing damn well it wouldn't be that easy.

"Have a fun time at Hogwarts."

"It won't be the same without you two… I'll be an old shrew amongst the other students." They all laughed and then Harry turned to the gather the floo powder in his hands.

"Harry… We're just worried about you. It _is_ Malfoy." Hermione whispered, successfully stopping him before he could enter into the flames.

"I know. And thanks but… I can't stop now. I need to know what happened. Who he really is."

"Why is it so important?" She asked. It was the same question he had been asking himself since he accepted the case. His stomach clenched uncomfortably as he thought it over and then the words were out before he could stop them.

"Because I think…I think I made a mistake. Because if he really is innocent, then that means I failed him."

"What are you talking about? Harry you're not responsible for-"

"They needed help Hermione." He didn't know when the tears started but he looked back at her through blurry eyes and the memories flooded in. Draco's sickly figure, the pale body lying in the hospital bed… Narcissa crumbled on the floor in Nagini's hold. Draco convulsing, foam running down his chin… "The night Dumbledore died, he offered to protect Malfoy and his parents… He told them he would keep them safe… A-and Malfoy believed him… He lowered his wand… H-He was sacred… Like all of us, he was scared. I knew it, I saw it! That night, I saw he was doing what he had to do, what he was _forced_ to do.

"I keep thinking… What if it had been me? What if my parents were still alive and Voldemort was threatening them… What would I have done?"

They were watching him sadly; Hermione full of sympathy and concern as she cried right along with him, but it was Ron's reaction. The confusion… The ghost of doubt about the Slytherin… The same that had been plaguing Harry's own thoughts…

He waited, desperate for them to say something, anything that would ease his mind but no reassuring words came and that in itself was terrifying.

His voice cracked as he shook his head and suddenly he was 17 year old Harry, looking across the rubble and debris that was Hogwarts School. Looking over the empty faces of his fallen friends, loved ones... Fred… Lupin… Lavender… Snape…Collin… Tonks… And with a cold dread he realized now what he had felt then… Failure.

And if the memories were true; Then Draco was his biggest failure yet… The others at least, he had tried to save. He had their best interests at heart… In the end they knew he was there and he would fight and he would die for them. What did Draco have at the end? What had he offered the blond? He had left him to fend for himself… Despite Dumbledore's promise of protection, despite the fact that Draco had lowered his wand… Harry had left him…

"H-How can I be a hero when I ignored the one person who needed me the most?"

XXX

"A friend of yours?" Harry was standing next to Narcissa inside the drawing room of Malfoy Manor. It was a surprisingly crowded memory as Draco and Snape appeared at her left and Lucius and Bellatrix stood at her right. No one moved, no one dared and Harry waited impatiently for the fog to lift and Narcissa to reluctantly raise her eyes to Voldemort and the two young women kneeling at his feet.

Harry was sure he had never seen them before but it was obvious they were related. Mother and daughter perhaps… at least, one seemed younger than the other... Merlin they were beautiful. Stepping forward, Harry could just make out the twin sets of blue-violet eyes and long raven black hair.

"Yes, my lord." Narcissa replied crisply, looking in every direction but the one that mattered. "This is Hellena Greengass, and her daughter, Astoria."

Harry gawked. Astoria? He _knew_ that name! Well, really, he knew her sister a little better, as Daphne had been in the same year as him; but the Greengrass' were part of the Sacred twenty-eight pureblood families still alive. Hermione had told him about the dwindling bloodlines shortly after he learned what a mudblood was, and Daphne had used her surname quite proudly when she was with Pansy Parkinson.

So why the hell were two purblood witches being held captive by Voldermort? Voldemort, who preached about blood purity?

"Ah! Greengrass!" Voldemort drawled as he stepped around them. "How lovely. I commend your choice of friends."

"Thank you my lord." Narcissa replied quietly, bowing with a stiff jerk that seemed foreign to her usual elegant movements.

"Tell me, Mrs. Greengrass. Why is it I have seen so little of you?" Hellena's face paled as the Dark Lord turned to her.

"M-My husband wished to stay out of the war…" Hellena managed to whisper and Harry couldn't help but notice the way Astoria's body stiffened next to her. She was lying, and if Harry was able to see it, he knew for a fact the others in the room would be able to as well.

"Ah. And you, being a dutiful wife, went along with his wishes?" Voldemort cooed, his smile widening as she nodded reluctantly in reply. "Tell me Narcissa, is this the only child of the Greengrass family?" Harry turned to look at her but his eyes fell instead on Draco. Draco whose sickly face was flushed, his hands fisted at his sides. His lips were twisted into a snarl, his eyes narrowed in rage, glaring shamelessly at the Dark Lord.

"No my lord, there is another girl, two years older." Narcissa said numbly, and as Harry finally turned his attention back to her, the stony mask fell back into place once more.

"Yes! but this one has a special little place in our Draco's heart." Bellatrix chirped, and everyone turned to look at the youngest Malfoy. Grey eyes flashed silver. "Isn't that right Draco darling?" She taunted.

He didn't reply right away, he didn't seem capable of responding without yelling, but Voldemort waited in amusement until Draco was once again able to control his temper. "Yes." He said flatly, glaring at Bellatrix with the same, new found courage he seemed to have acquired while staring at the Dark Lord.

"Oh?" Voldemort pressed.

"The child there… Asotria? She's his betrothed!" Bellatrix cried dramatically, clutching at her own heart and falling against Lucius' chest in mockery.

What?

Harry blinked in confusion, looking from Draco's heated eyes to Astoria's fearful expression. _Betrothed_?

"Oh?" Voldemort said again.

"We arranged their marriage when they were children." Lucius spoke for the first time, his voice rough and full of disgust. "Narcissa and Hellena were friends at Hogwarts and they wanted their children to marry." Harry found it strangely odd that Lucius said 'their' children instead of 'our' and by the quick look Narcissa shot him, she did as well.

Draco however, didn't seem the least bit interested in what his father had to say. His eyes were locked with Astoria's, their gaze never wavering from one another despite the conversations around them. And then Harry understood... It wasn't just longing and apologetic looks. They didn't have to try and interpret one another, they already knew; If she were as trained in legilimency and occlumency as Draco was, they were probably able to at least share their feelings, if not their own thoughts. Right now, in front of the Dark Lord, in front of everyone they were having a silent conversation, a rapid and fierce understanding wafting between each other.

"I see." Voldemort said casually, noticing Draco's unblinking gaze and he bent down to tilt Astoria's chin up, earning a startled gasp as her concentration was broken. "She is such a beautiful girl isn't she Draco?"

Hellena's face flashed in concern, she leaned forward, either to beg him to leave Astoria alone or demand he back away when Narcissa's turned to meet her gaze. Something passed between the two women… a look Harry couldn't quite interpret and then Narcissa tore her eyes away, watching as Draco gave a curt nod to the Dark Lord.

"It's a shame really, how foolish your husband is…" Voldemort sighed, looking at Hellena again. "You say he didn't want to get caught up in the war, and yet he was found helping muggleborns."

"Shit." Harry cursed as the room fell silent. Hellena didn't try to deny it, if anything she stared boldly back at him. "Well… We can't have that, can we Narcissa?"

"My lord?" Narcissa became frozen, her eyes whipping up to Voldemort's and panic seemed to seize her.

"I can't have a pureblood house openly defy me Narcissa…" Voldemort drawled. "Erwin is taking care of William Greengrass, and you will take care of these two." Draco went rigid at Harry's side. "We'll leave the eldest to carry on the Greengrass name."

No!

For a moment Narcissa could do nothing but stare at him and for one tantalizing moment Harry thought she was going to refuse. Perhaps she would have, if Lucius hadn't nudged her forwards.

"We'd be happy to." It took one more warning look from her husband before Narcissa seemed to gather her wits, her face the picture of indifference once again as she nodded briefly in agreement.

"My lord…" Draco floundered for an argument, cringing as the cold eyes fell on him.

"Don't worry Draco. If you're that attracted to the Greengrass family I'll give you the other daughter. Though, there are many other suitable options." Voldemort replied carelessly, motioning to Astoria as if she were last years broom model.

"You fucking bastard! That isn't the point!" Harry roared, seeing the rage fill the blonds face and Narcissa fidgeting nervously next to her son.

"Draco…" Astoria's soothing voice seemed so incredibly out of place in the dark room. It was a gentle whisper, nothing more, but startled and curious eyes fell on her. She ignored them… The stares, the warning looks, the jab from her mother… Her attention was solely on the Slytherin Prince. "Draco… I know you…" She whispered. No. Merlin… No. Not this.

Harry felt his chest constrict painfully. He couldn't do this… He couldn't stand here and watch the parting words of another innocent party. He couldn't watch the utter shock and emotional pain fleeting over Draco's face. The disbelief and guilt filled gaze of Narcissa… He couldn't.

Turning away from the Greengrass' Harry struggled to remember how to surface from the memory… Merlin it had never been this hard before, had it? He couldn't think… He tried pushing away the faces, the words of Narcissa Malfoy… His promise to her… He would go back to Hogwarts with Hermione. He would beg Ginny for forgiveness. He would sell owls if he had to, as long as he got out before-

"I _know _you…" Her voice sounded so incredibly frail and Harry heard the roar of rage from Voldemort… He couldn't help it, he turned to look over his shoulder and saw her... The beautiful Astoria Greengrass, looking at Draco as if he were a knight from a fairy tale, smiling the saddest smile Harry had ever seen.

"Kill them!" Voldemort was in front of Narcissa now, shaking her furiously and pointing to the two women on the floor. "Kill them now!" And when she didn't move he grabbed her chin with long, claw-like nails, his voice suddenly quiet and deadly. "Do not disappoint me."

The threat was all but clear as Voldemort withdrew his wand, pointing it at Draco and Narcissa's face paled. Without a word she slipped from his hold and shuffled towards Hellena, her feet moving mechanically, her face unreadable.

"No!" Harry and Draco cried out at the same time as Narcissa reached for her wand. Malfoy leaped forward but whatever he was about to do, Harry would never know. Snape grabbed him, pulling his arms behind his back to pin him there, the potion master's face a dark mask of warning as he held his godson. That didn't stop Draco from shouting, not bothering to hide his panic anymore. "My lord! Please, wait-" But Voldemort ignored him, grinning in triumph as Hellena began to cry.

"Narcissa!" Hellena murmured.. "Narcissa please! We're friends!" But Narcissa didn't reply, didn't show any sign of having heard her as she raised her wand. "Narcissa! We stood at each other's weddings! We raised our children together!"

"Wait!" Voldemort demanded. "Kill the girl first." Draco was struggling against Snape, his eyes wide and full of fear.

"My lord! Please!" But the amused look never left Voldemort's face as Narcissa turned numbly, reluctantly to Astoria.

"NO!" Hellena hollered raising her arms out as if they could stop the curse. "Narcissa please! Not my baby! Not my child!"

"I'm sorry…" Narcissa whispered, flourishing her wand.

Draco kicked at his godfather, pleading, begging, _crying_ and Astoria's eyes closed, a green light filled the room and Narcissa's voice rose over her son's. "Avada Kedavra!"

"NO!"

Time seemed to move in slow motion as Astoria Greengrass' body went rigid, the petite form swaying for a moment before slowly, ever so slowly, crumbling to the floor on her side.

"ASTORIA!" Hellena shrieked, reaching for the lifeless body of her child.

"DAMN YOU NARCISSA! DAMN YOU!" She cried as she slumped over her daughter, urgently slicking back long locks of hair. Tears pooled onto the ghostly cheeks as she hovered over her, shaking her child furiously. "Astoria! Please! No! Astoria!"

"Kill her." Voldemort urged from somewhere behind Narcissa.

"Astoria! Astoria!" Hellena begged, oblivious to the wand now pointing at her. Oblivious to her friend's haunted face although Harry could see it… He could see Narcissa struggling to move her arm, struggling to keep the tears at bay.

"Avada Kedavra!"

The room fell eerily silent. Harry looked down at the crumbled bodies of mother and daughter and he suddenly couldn't breathe.

It was Voldemort who was the first to move, a grin plastered on his face as he glided over to Narcissa, giving her shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "Well done." The Dark Lord hissed and she could do nothing but nod, hiding her eyes behind the cascading locks of her golden hair.

Harry turned to look at Draco… At least, the shell of what was left of Malfoy. He was sagging against Severus, grey eyes locked despairingly at the body of fiancée, oblivious to Voldemort's approaching form. "It's for the best Draco." Voldemort said easily, tapping the blond's chin with his finger to draw his gaze.

Draco looked numbly up at him, his lips parted slightly as if he was about to reply but he didn't. He couldn't and Harry felt the knot in his chest grow bigger and bigger at Draco's broken expression. Finally, the blond nodded, a small, pathetic movement, but the Dark Lord seemed pleased enough by the action.

With one last smirk Voldemort released him, turning to the door and motioning Bellatrix to follow.

…The memory faded only to resurface a moment later with Narcissa walking slowly back into the drawing room, stopping in the doorway to watch Draco huddled over the bodies of Astoria and Hellena. He was alone now, kneeling next to them with his long fingers subconsciously running through Astoria's silky hair.

He wasn't crying, but the hollow look in his eyes was somehow worse.

"Draco…" She approached his crouched figure, not having enough courage to reach out to him as his hands gently caressed Astoria's lifeless face. "Draco…They would have died regardless… It was a question of if we would follow."

He looked up at her, his face blank and the emptiness was almost too much to bare.

"I know. You did what you had to do." He said flatly and Narcissa cringed at his dejected voice.

"Draco… Please," She was crying, clutching at her chest as if there was something stabbing at her. "Please…don't hate me."

He shook his head and his gaze flickered back to Astoria. "I don't hate you... I hate the people we've become."


	5. The Sacrifices We Must Make

**I'm sorry this chapter has taken so long. I actually had it done weeks ago but I literally rewrote it five times! I just couldn't decide on how to build the relationship between Narcissa and Harry… I knew I had to make their views on each other change drastically and I literally went through five different scenarios from a sympathetic Harry to a down right murderous one. I admit I still have my doubts about posting this but out of all my drafts I think it was the most realistic in regards to both character's reactions... I hope I'm not wrong. **

**I hope you all enjoy this chapter. It was probably the hardest one for me, but it will be worth it. Memory, child Draco next chapter! FINALLY!**

**And thank you everyone for taking the time to read my story and all those who have reviewed and or favorited me. I appreciate it more than I can ever express! Please enjoy!  
**

Harry thought he knew what pain was…

Emotional, physical… He had dealt with it. From the beatings as a child to the Cruciatus curse. From the betrayal of his peers to the death of his loved ones… It had been a constant, an unwanted friend and somewhere along the line he had convinced himself he had went through the worst. That fate had somehow evened out and he would be allowed a small portion of peace…

And yet, here he was… Sitting alone in the library of Grimmauld Place, his face buried into the palm of his hands, sobs racking his body, the lump in his throat making it hard to breathe…

Narcissa Malfoy had killed Hellena and Astoria Greengrass.

Her best friend.

Her soon to be daughter-in-law.

They were dead.

She had killed them.

And fate was a joke!

Harry shook his head, not knowing what else to do but sit dumbly in his chair and wait for the tears to stop. Merlin, He had cried more in these last few days than he had his entire life and he was sick of it!

He didn't want this anymore…

Having to go through each heart wrenching memory… Having to be reminded of all the people who had suffered and died because he had been too young, too naïve, too arrogant of the world outside of Hogwarts! Having to watch once again as people's lives crumbled under the strain of a war he had been responsible for!

"Fuck!" Harry roared, slamming his hands down onto the table in front of him.

He wasn't supposed to_ care_! This was Malfoy! Draco and Narcissa! The conceited, arrogant, racists' cowards! They had made Dobby's life hell! They belittled, bullied, humiliated-

But Draco had lowered his wand…

Narcissa had tried to run away…

Fuck, they had tried to run away!

With a snarl Harry stood, turning from the pensieve and stomping out of the room, his thoughts swirling together in confusion, his chest constricting as he rushed down the flight of stairs, ignoring a startled gasp from Kreacher as he passed the kitchen. "Master?"

"Go back to sleep!" Harry snapped as he made his way to the drawing room, not even pausing to shrug into his jumper as he picked up the bowl from the mantle. The clock above him flashed 3:30 a.m. but he couldn't make that matter either. "St. Mungos !" Harry yelled into the fireplace.

XXX

Narcissa jerked awake as the door burst inward, light from the hallway spilling into Draco's room. Instinctively she stood, reaching for a wand that wasn't there and hovered over her son as Harry Potter stepped inside.

They both froze, Harry in surprise at seeing her there and Narcissa too wary to make any movement. Something was different about him. She couldn't quite see his face through the casted shadows but the tension following him was palpable. "Y-You're here." Harry finally stated, his voice sounding much too tense for her liking.

"I'm always here Mr. Potter." She said carefully, watching as he slowly moved deeper into the room. He had been crying, she could tell by the puffiness around his eyes, and while he looked exhausted, his face was filled with anger. And then she knew… "So you've seen them? The memories I gave you?"

His jaw tightened noticeably and she watched the disgust and disbelief crawling into the depths of his eyes. He was expecting her to cry, to plead, to beg for forgiveness, but it wasn't his to demand. How dare he judge her, how dare any of them…. As if they knew! As if they knew what it had been like to do that to Hellena. To _Astoria!_

"Oh please, spare me that look." She snapped. "I know what you think of me Mr. Potter. The things I've done are unforgivable, but one day you will understand. When you become a parent yourself you will understand the sacrifices we must make. Just like your mother. She died for her son and I have killed for mine."

He snarled, and suddenly his wand was drawn and pointed at her chest. How dare she compare herself to Lilly! How dare she even mention her! "My mother didn't have anywhere else to go! You had every opportunity! Before He returned, before He gained power, before your idiot of a husband tried to kill me! You could have taken Draco and ran!"

"Oh yes, of course I could have!" She hissed back, her voice dripping in sarcasm, dismissing his wand with a roll of her eyes. "And where should I have gone? Lucius was in charge of all our assests. I had no money, no job experience, no family to go to besides Bellattix...! But maybe, the Ministry would have protected me? Because we all know how keen they were in believing the Dark Lord had returned."

Harry hesitated, his heart thumping against his chest. It had been so long since he allowed his thoughts to drift to end of his fourth year... To Cedric and everything that had followed... And she was right, he knew more than anyone, the lengths the Ministry had went through to keep Voldemort's reappearance under wraps... What would they have done to Narcissa if she had gone to them and asked for help?

"…Or perhaps, Dumbledore would have taken us in!" Narcissa said sharply, aware that her words had chastised him. "Because others have fared so well under _his_ watchful eye! Your parents, Sirius, _you_…! I'm sorry, I don't think me and Draco would have been able to return from the dead as easily as you had!" He winced at that. He wanted to argue and tell her that none of that been Dumbledore's fault, but then, it didn't have to be… If people who Dumbledore had genuinely cared for had succumbed to a deadly fate what could he have done for Narcissa? Put her in a safe house like his parents? Keep them locked up at Hogwarts…?

"Don't mock me! Lucuis worked in the Ministry until he was taken to Azkaban and he was loyal to the Dark Lord through and through. Had I ran they would have found us within an hour and killed us for betraying them! I didn't have a choice! There was no one to help me. Not all of us are blessed with the kind of friends that would-"

She froze, her lips sealing into a straight line and Harry knew she was thinking about Hellena. Fine, so maybe she couldn't have ran so easily… That didn't change the fact that she had murdered her best friend!

"You were never formally charged with their deaths…" Harry said quietly, his voice still too tense, his eyes still too uncertain… Narcissa's gaze darted back down to his wand. "Why would you show us the memory?"

"To help catch the other Death Eaters." She replied stiffly.

"Erwin you mean? He killed William Greengrass?" She nodded. "Then tell us his name! Why give us anything that could give you a life sentence in Azkaban?"

"I'm confused Mr. Potter. You're angry because I did something that will _help _you? It's a relief isn't it? How easy that memory makes your job?"

"You think this is funny do you?" Harry roared, his wand on her again. "She was your friend! Your_ friend_! Don't you _care_?"

"Of course I _care_!" She hissed quietly, her voice coiling around him like a snake... Merlin he could almost feel the venomous threat in each letter. If he had thought himself to be angry she was down right livid. "How dare you judge me! You think glimpsing into my memories gives you any idea about who I am? I knew that that memory would condemn me, and why shouldn't it? It was my sin! But Kingsley said he wouldn't charge me, he said unforgiveable curses were legalized that year! If you're having some inner turmoil about whether or not to expose my crime then talk him! But don't you dare insinuate for a moment that I didn't_ care_ about her."

Harry couldn't think of anything to say as she turned from him, her face a contorting field of emotions and suddenly he felt guilty. He had seen it, hadn't he? The reluctance? The pain… And she had told him… Told him she belonged in Azkaban… This wasn't a joke to her… It was Kingsley he had to ask about her file, it was Kingsley who he should be questioning about her charges… So why wasn't the anger lessening?

"Hellena…" He struggled to control his voice. He knew what he must look like, red eyes, messy robes, disheveled and exhausted, barging into Draco's room at three in the morning… He had been angry and confused and when he saw her standing there… well, he wanted her to _hurt_, to hurt just as much as he did… Now however, as he watched her, he had an aching suspicion that she may be hurting far more than he was…"S-She… S-She was your best friend?"

She looked at him, really looked at him. Her eyes boring into his own, fierce, almost pleading and he thought that maybe, he already knew what she was going to say. "She was my _only_ friend."

Dear god, no.

The image of her standing in the drawing room, her hair covering her eyes, her defeated shoulders slumped forward… The tears she had cried over Draco's empty face… What if it had been him? What if it were his child? What if Hellena had been Ron? The first friend he had ever made…

"And Astoria…?" The words came out on their own, his hand subconsciously clutching at his chest. Merlin it hurt to breathe…

Narcissa looked close to tears now, her eyes flickering guiltily to her son. "Draco was first destined to be the husband of Daphne Greengrass. It wasn't until he was thirteen that he came to me and Hellena to ask for Astoria's hand instead…"

"He really did love her?" He couldn't help the uncertainty, before watching the memories Harry had been quite certain that Draco didn't love anyone except himself.

"Not in the sense you are thinking…" She answered reluctantly. "There was never anything romantic between them… They were friends. If it hadn't been for the pureblood customs and our influence they never would have thought to marry. But he cared for her, more than I could ever express…"

With a sigh Harry unclenched his hands, blinking down at his palm where his nails had broken through his skin. His fingers tingled in relief as the tension dissipated, numbness shooting up his arm. If only it could travel to his chest, then this conversation might actually be bearable…

"Why are you here Mr. Potter?" Her voice was not unkind… For anyone else it might even have sounded concerned if not a bit wary, but he winced all the same, stumbling back as if she had slapped him.

"I-I don't…" Know... He didn't know why he had come here. After surfacing from the pensieve he hadn't been able to stop thinking about the Draco and he had rushed to the hospital in search of a much needed explanation...

Of course he hadn't counted on Narcissa to be present… Nor had he expected the sudden inability to look upon her son.

"Are you here to drop the case?" She pressed irritability and his eyes widened. Dear god...Could he? Maybe that would be best. Tell her to find someone else… Run back to Grimmauld and gather the vials, rush into Kingsley's office and resign this minute. If he left early enough he would still have time to make into Diagon Alley and gather his things before the Hogwarts express arrived… He could do it. Just two little words…

Before he could speak however she had glided around Draco's bed, coming to stand right in front of him. "Why are you so upset? This isn't just about the memories. There's something more isn't there?"

Merlin, there had to be… Why else would he still feel so angry? Why else would his chest feel like a claw was wrapped around his heart? "What are you afraid of?"

Afraid? Yes, he supposed he was afraid… He was terrified!

Merlin, maybe Ginny had been right… why _did_ he insist on keeping himself locked into this hell hole of the past? It's not like he didn't have options… A DADA professor…. A professional seeker… Hell, he could even beg George for a job! It didn't' have to be this… It didn't have to be death and sadness and broken pieces of people he knew! He had enough of that to last a lifetime without adding these memories as well…

Her voice reached out to him again, more determined now. "I asked for you because it was the only chance we would ever have to a fair trial… What do I need to do? Beg you on my hands and knees to stay, because I will if it means saving my son."

"N-No! That's not what I want!"

"Then what-"

"I don't want to have to watch you both die!" For a moment silence fell between them, both startled by his revelation, but once the words were spoken, there was no more holding them back. "You think it will be different because I'm Harry Potter but it won't! If anything it will be worse because of my lack of persuasion or experience, or whatever other nonsense they bring up! Whether you deserve it or not, I don't want to see it! I thought it wouldn't _matter,_ I thought I could be unbiased, that I could just tell the truth and not be affected by the outcome! But I don't know what the truth is!

"I look at everything you've done and I hate you for it and then I think it over and I can't stand the thought of you having to live through that. I can't stand the thought of _him _living through that!" Harry cried, pointing in Draco's direction. "I don't know if either one of you belong in Azkaban but I do know that despite everything I tell them, everything I say at the trial you still have every possibility of going and I don't want to see it! Merlin, I've seen enough people die!"

He looked at the floor, his face flushed, his body trembling and he realized, it was the truth. He was afraid. Afraid of watching them die, afraid of being the one to condemn them, afraid of being too weak, of failing one more time… Merlin he couldn't do this…

"What were you expecting it was like living under the Dark Lord Mr. Potter?" She asked softly, almost sympathetically but he couldn't meet her gaze this time. What had he expected?

When it was clear he wasn't going to answer she turned from him, sighing in exhaustion and the guilt pounded through him again. Merlin she had to be tired…

Narcissa began to pace, her hand reaching up to subconsciously fondle the chain around her neck, her fingers clasping around the silver band. For a moment Harry thought she had forgotten him, her mind clearly focused on something else when she stopped suddenly in place, her free hand rubbing the fatigue from her eyes.

"I know what this means for you, and I am sorry…" She sighed wearily. "Salazar, You're just a boy…"

With a startled gasp he met her piercing gaze. No mask, no sarcasm, true and utter sincerity... He didn't even have the time to wrap his mind around it. "Please understand… I have no other options. He is my _son_. I know you don't want to do this but at least with you, there is a sliver of hope. If you drop the case now, we won't even have that."

Merlin, no... She's the one who needed to understand! "I'm not the hero everyone thinks I am…" He whispered desperately. "I-If you're found guilty-"

"Then it wouldn't be your fault." He opened his mouth to argue but she shook her head. "You can't save everyone Mr. Potter."

XXX

"Harry!" Luna looked dreamily up at her friend, grinning as he made a startled noise and stumbled backwards through the door of his office. She couldn't quite fault him, as it was only five in the morning and the entire Department was evidently empty, she supposed he wouldn't expect to see her sitting at his desk…

"L-Luna?" Harry asked as he peeked inside once more. She nodded. "What in the world-"

"You usually have very good reflexes Harry… I didn't think I'd surprise you. Perhaps you're preoccupied with the Nargles… They seem to follow you a lot." He frowned, eyes skimming the room warily before trudging forward to meet her. "Neville says 'hello' by the way."

"Luna, what are you doing here?"

"I'm talking to you." She said in confusion, as if it were obvious.

"No. I mean, how did you get in my office?" Only Ron had the key to their office and both of them had covered it with a plethora of security wards. Seeing however, as none of them had been set off and the identification charm that he quickly cast revealed that it was indeed Luna Lovegood, he was more intrigued than worried.

"I was here since yesterday. I'm afraid I might have caused one of the house elves a fright when she came to clean this morning but since I didn't get in the way of her work I don't think she minded.-"

"Since yesterday?" He asked in disbelief, his eyes widening as she nodded matter-of-factly.

"I heard it was your day off so I decided to wait. You have an infestation of Wrackspurts you know?"

"B-But how did you get _in_ here?"

"I told you, I came here yesterday. Ron and I had a lovely chat for a while but then he had to leave so I decided to stay here until I talked to you."

"You stayed here all night?" She gave a sleepy smile.

"H-How did… I don't-" Even with Ron's invitation it didn't explain why the wards had been up when Harry arrived… How had they reset with her still inside the office?

"I was hoping to see you before I had to be in Diagon Alley to catch the train, but I didn't expect you so early. It was sad to hear you aren't coming back to Hogwarts but this job always did seem to suit you. You look very regal in your Auror robes!"

"I… you… Err, thanks." She beamed. "Luna, what was so important that you slept the night in my office?"

"Oh I didn't sleep. I thought that may be weird. Instead, I made you this!" Harry hadn't noticed the pearlescent pink bag sitting on her lap until she began rummaging through it, her eyes sparkling in triumph as she withdrew a necklace.

"Err, Luna, what exactly-"

"The strap is made out of braided unicorn tail. I gathered it myself…!" Harry didn't know whether to be concerned or impressed that someone could 'gather' unicorn hair but it was the hanging stone at the end that piqued his interest. "And this!" She gushed. "I carved it from jade! It's supposed to be a very precious stone in Japan. Me and father visited there this summer. Do you see the little dragon-like creatures? They're called Shisa. Japanese Wizards believed them to be guardians of protection but they were hunted to extinction because of the healing properties their tails have…" She stood up to slip the necklace over his head, grinning as it fell limply against the front of his robes. "Since you have a dangerous job, you should have as much protection as you can get!"

Harry smiled in exasperation. Not sure whether he should press her for more information about her ability to disregard his security wards or simply grin at the fact that she had spent a whole night carving little figurings in jade for him. It was endearing, if not a little disturbing. "Thanks Luna. Now, will you please tell me what you wanted to talk about?"

"Oh!" Her round eyes grew wider as she seemed to remember her initial task. "Kingsley told me I should talk to you about the Malfoy case!"

Harry's stomach plummeted. Merlin, he had forgotten about Luna, about any of the people who had been freed from the Malfoy Manor… Was talking to witnesses his job as well? Why hadn't he thought to ask her? Oh god… What if she wanted to testify against them? After he had just agreed to stay on… What happened when she found out he was trying to-"

"I was told to let you know that I wanted to testify on their behalf."

Oh.

"Testify?" She nodded again. "To… _help_ them?" He questioned. Maybe he heard wrong… She didn't honestly want-

"Of course! I went to visit Draco a few days ago… It was the first time I met his mother. She's very nice!" _His mothe_r? She had chatted with _Narcissa_? Harry shook his head in confusion, trying to make sense of her words.

"You-"

"I would have asked Father to come and testify as well but he has such strong feelings about coming to the Ministry…"

"Luna… Didn't they _torture_ you?" He hadn't meant to snap at her, but Merlin… What the bloody hell did she mean 'testify on their behalf'…? They had kept her in a dungeon for Merlin's sake! But it was Luna's turn to stare at him as if he were the one with an extra head.

"I just_ told_ you Harry, I met Mrs. Malfoy a few days ago… I never saw her-"

"I mean _Draco_!" She laughed at his frustrated expression.

"That's very rude to say Harry. Draco gave me pudding!" Harry blinked. Draco… _what_? "I have to go now, there is still so much to pack before I have to leave, but I wanted to make sure you knew to send for me when the trials begin!" He could do nothing but nod stupidly at her. "I'll be at Hogwarts if you need to speak with me. And make sure you wear the necklace Harry! The wackspurts are _everywhere_!"

Before he could think of a response she gave him a gentle wave and turned, grinning as she skipped out the door.

**Please R and R! **


	6. He's a Slytherin

**Hey everyone. I wanted to get this out before the 25th, just so I could say Happy Christmas, and thank everyone for the reviews, favorites, and feedback on my story. I hope this chapter finds all of you safe, happy and healthy during this holiday season, whether you practice it or not.**

**To ToughGirls... I hope this chapter addressed a few of your questions from your last review, and I hope you continue following it to find out the rest. I'm not sure if this is the relationship you were expecting between Draco and Blaise, but I promise Zabini will appear outside of the memories. Soon, hopefully. Haha.  
**

**And to Emeralden Rapley, I'm glad this Draco met your expectations. I also feel that he is sometimes weakened as a character and I wanted to show him with a bit more depth (Although he will go through his weak moments.) I also marvel at how very few people mention Draco's mental power, seeing as he was even able to block Snape from using legilimency on him! So I made that pretty important in this story. Most of his 'stronger side' will show up later on but until now, I hope I can keep your interest. **

**And everyone, I hope you all enjoy little Draco. It was hard keeping him as a Malfoy when all I want to do is scoop him up and huggle him; but I hope this showed a little development on how I believe he would have grown up in Malfoy Manor. Anyways! Please leave me a reply and tell me what you think. **

"Mr. Potter!"

"Fuck." Harry mumbled, wincing as he turned to see Olivia stalking towards him. There wasn't enough time to offer an apology before her hand wrapped around the collar of his shirt, yanking him to herself with a snarl.

"Funnily enough Mr. Potter, when I tell someone to meet me in my office at eight, I expect for them to _be_ in my office at eight!" She snapped before pulling him along the hallway. Harry sighed, ignoring the amused and sympathetic stares of his fellow Aurors as he struggled to keep pace with her.

"I'm sorry but I need to speak with Kingsley. It's important!" She scoffed.

"Kingsley isn't here. He's meeting with some muggle leader…" Ah… Well, that explained why Harry couldn't locate him for the last couple of hours. "And what are you implying? My training _isn't _important?"

"What? N-No!-"

"As if I enjoy being subjected to your pathetic mental skills.-"

"Hey!" He cried indignantly. Alright, so he wasn't the best student when it came to legilimency or occlumency, he was _trying_ at least!

"-Now you have the audacity to force me to scour the entire Ministry for you.-"

"It's regarding the Malfoy case!-"

"And my training isn't?" She demanded, silencing him immediately.

They stumbled through the hall, Harry literally being dragged by the collar of his Auror robes and though he objected at first, one warning look had quelled him instantly.

He didn't believe that the anger was completely directed at him, surely others had been late for a meeting with her? He had honestly been searching for Kingsley since six, and while it may have seen as an exaggeration to spend so much time looking for one person, the Ministry was _huge_.

"Err, where are we going?" Harry asked as they passed the training room, his frown deepening as she hurried him towards the lifts.

Olivia rolled her eyes in exasperation, gritting her teeth as Harry began to struggle against her iron grip in earnest. "Stop that! You're supposed to be extracting Draco Malfoy's memories; where else would we go besides Draco's hospital room?" Oh.

"B-But I don't have enough training!" Harry whined. "I'm not ready to use legilimency on him!"

"It's not as if it can hurt your training. In this way, I'll be able to instruct you more accurately when we see how Mr. Malfoy's mind reacts to your presence." Of course it was completely logical. He knew she was right but the thought of having to return back to St. Mungos was not a welcoming thought. "Now shut up, we're late enough as it is!"

XXX

Harry stood irritably in the middle of Draco's hospital room, avoiding Narcissa's gaze and trying to pay attention to Olivia's instructions. It was hard, considering he had barged in here only hours ago, making a spectacle that had inevitably led up to his mental breakdown in front of his rival's mother…

Narcissa, to her credit however remained silent, sparing only a curious look at him once before retreating to the window where she would remain safely out of the way of the Aurors. "Now, . This is just an experiment. Go through his memory stream and make a note of the things that are different from mine. If you are able to, watch them, if not, retreat back here. Do you understand?" He nodded solemnly. "Good. When you're ready then…"

Harry sighed, and withdrew his wand, feeling Narcissa's eyes on him again as he stepped up to Draco.

It was hard looking at Malfoy, seeing the peaceful expression on the weathered face… How many times had Harry witnessed those same lips snarling at him across the Great Hall? How many times had those pale hands held a wand out to threaten him…? Three years ago Harry had nearly pulverized the boy with a snitch, and now he couldn't even look at the blond's face for more than a few seconds?

Merlin, was he afraid_ of_ Malfoy?

After all these years; all the curses and insults and terrible pranks, after all the threats and discovering of the Dark Mark Harry had never felt intimidated. Not until now; when the grey eyes could no longer glare at him. When the thin arms could no longer rise and his thin legs could no longer hold their host up… Only now did Harry feel uncomfortable...

Shaking his head Harry forced himself to focus on the pale eyelids, taking in Draco's ghostly appearance before he flourished his wand, his voice shaking as he shouted, "Legilimens!"

XXX

Using Legilimency on Draco was much different than using it on Olivia. Where the Witch's mind was a fast moving current of flashing images Draco's memories passed him slowly in a foggy swirl of colors. It was impossible to make out shapes, and the noises that were meant to be voices came out as muffles...

Maybe with more training he would be able to pick up tell-tale signs of information or strengthen himself enough to call on memories he needed, but as of now he had no choice but to pick a random blur and hope for the best. Sighing he chose the one closest to him...

A room materialized in front of him, a library by the looks of it as rows and rows of shelves slowly molded into view. Harry ignored the seemingly endless volumes as the room spiraled out of his vision and a large black desk popped up before him. A woman Harry didn't know also appeared; a very elderly witch with a pointy face and grey sinewy hair that ended at her bony shoulders. With a sigh she pushed the lenses of her wire rimmed glasses higher up her nose, looking angrily across the table where her hawkish eyes narrowed on a younger version of Draco Malfoy.

Harry looked over the pureblood, unable to suppress the grin at seeing a much shorter version of his former nemesis. He couldn't be older than eight but already there were very definite trademark signs of the Malfoy he knew. A cold, annoyed sneer, the sleeked platinum hair…

Young Draco was standing behind a pile of textbooks and papers, his face scrunched in concentration, and suddenly Harry was behind those grey eyes, feeling Malfoy's growing frustration as the two melded together.

"Je suis, tu es, il/elle est, nous sommes, vous serez " Harry heard himself- heard Draco chanting.

"Non, non, non! We are studying the present tense Monsieur Malfoy! Vous êtes! Êtes!" They looked up into the Witch's stern expression as she rapped a ruler on the surface of the desk, disappointment evident on her face. "You will begin again!"

_For fucks sake!_ Harry- Draco thought angrily, his small hands clenching into fists at Harry's side. With gritted teeth Draco began his foreign mantra. "Je suis, tu es-"

"Stop! You will begin from the first set of verbs I gave you!" Harry felt Draco's mouth drop in disbelief, anger quickly swelling inside his stomach. _No she fucking wouldn't!_

"B-But there are twenty verbs!" Malfoy finally managed to stutter out, his voice incredulous at the prospect of having to start-whatever this was- all over again.

"Oui." The witch said, unmoved.

"B-But there are Ninety-six conjugations for each verb!" Ninety-six? _Jesus_! Harry frowned in concern, watching the woman raise an eyebrow unsympathetically.

"Then why are you wasting time?" She hissed. "Your father said he wanted you fluent in French. Did he not?" Malfoy didn't reply but by the rage bubbling up his chest, Harry imagined he knew which look he was sending the woman. "Again!" She demanded, and then Harry felt the ruler snap across Draco's knuckles and heard the blond curse savagely in his head as he pulled his hand safely out of her reach. "Again!"

_Fucking French cow!_ "Je mangé…" Malfoy hissed through clenched teeth.

…

Harry flung himself out of the French lesson, grinning mildly in amusement before he chose the next blob that passed by.

This new memory had Harry back in Malfoy Manor and a much younger, four or five year old Draco running wildly around the garden. Little Malfoy sprinted passed the doorway that led into the drawing room and flung himself towards a cluster of white orchids, his little hands flourishing a twig over the flowers as he shouted "Herbitius!"

Harry couldn't help but laugh. Draco was trying to grow flowers? It was strangely endearing, seeing the mini blond pronounce Herbivicus with slurred grammar and frowning at the failed spell. With a sigh Draco tossed the twig over his shoulder, not seeming to care as bits of bark peppered over unruly strands of platinum hair; and then with a blink, Harry phased into the child body, staring wildly up at… well, at everything.

It was surreal, how incredibly big everything seemed and how blissfully innocent Malfoy's thoughts were. Pretty flowers, blue skies, white peacocks… .

Hurried footsteps caused Draco to turn around and Harry's heart stuck in his throat as a very familiar, very worried looking house elf bound frantically after them. "Y-Youngest Master! Please come back inside! Your father doesn't like you out here alone sir!" Dobby cried nervously.

"But I'm not alone!" Draco giggled in relief. "You're here now."

"B-But Dobby is needed inside sir!" The elf said pleadingly and Harry knew Draco wasn't being mean. He was genuinely happy that Dobby was out here with him and it was a nice day and he didn't want his friend to go back to work in the kitchen to leave him by himself again.

Oh Merlin… his _friend_?

"You're always needed inside." Draco huffed, his little hands resting on his hips. "I demand you to play with me!" And with a burst of happiness Draco rushed over to sweep the elf's hands in his and pull Dobby into a run. Harry gaped. Where was the pureblood superiority? Where was the disgust that came with touching the elves? The venom of the aristocratic status..?

Dobby looked terrified as Harry and Draco spun him around in a circle, the blond grinning as the elf's floppy ears bounced precariously around his head. And then, Malfoy laughed._ Laughed_! His little voice chiming happily around the garden, his grey eyes sparkling mischievously as the two scattered the peacocks from the rose bushes.

"Y-Youngest master… P-Please-"

"Draco!" Malfoy froze, dropping Dobby's hands in fear as Lucius appeared in the doorway.

Harry didn't have enough time to understand what was happening before Lucius had swooped upon them, grabbing Dobby by his collar and flinging him into a nearby flower bed. "I told you!" Lucius roared, a yelp tearing its way from Harry's mouth as the infamous cane slashed across Draco's face. "I told you never to touch them!"

Stars filled Harry- Draco's vision and they cried out again, keeling over to wrap their arms protectively over Draco's head. _Fuck!_ Harry screamed, the cane moving down from the blond's face to lash over the little back. "They, are your, servants! I will never, see you, associate, with them, again!" Lucius demanded, the cane meeting the blond's skin with each pause. "Do I make myself clear?" Harry felt Draco's tears rush down his face and a feeble 'Yes father!' escape his lips before Lucius finally stopped.

Malfoy's ears were ringing, his body searing in pain… Dear god it hurt, everything hurt! Harry gasped through shuddering breaths, Draco's torso crying out. Was that a broken rib? _Fuck _Harry breathed again, trying to pinpoint Lucius through the blond's cries.

Harry decided that he must have left because a moment later Dobby cried out in alarm, small footsteps rushing towards Draco's crumbled body. "Youngest Master!" The elf sobbed, reaching shaking fingers down to gently caress the blond's hair.

Malfoy's eyes snapped open, a low growl rising warningly out of Harry's lips. He couldn't control the raw anger rushing through Draco's body; Merlin Voldemort would have been impressed if he saw the little boy now… "Don't touch me!" Draco roared, ignoring the hurt look flittering over the elf's face.

"Dobby will help you inside sir.-"

"Get away from me!" Draco demanded, his face pressed helplessly against the ground, his little hands clutching at his robes. "I said get away!"

Dobby stumbled back, unsure if leaving his broken master was worse than disobeying him. And Draco was glaring, crying and growling all at once, his thought unable to register anything else but the rage and pain.

"S-Stop!"

Harry gasped for air, feeling his back hit the tile of the hospital room floor. His head was reeling, his stomach churning as he struggled to focus on Olivia's frustrated eyes. He didn't care… He didn't care if she was upset. Draco…Dobby…

Merlin, it had been Dobby…

And Draco, He…Merlin he had thought of him as a _friend_? Of course it had been Lucius! Of course he was the one who had_ beaten_ the pureblood ideas into his son. _Don't cry! Don't CRY! _Harry chided himself as Olivia tapped her foot above him. "Mr. Potter…"

"He's tired." Narcissa's even voice startled Harry, his eyes whipping over to her poised form. Did she… Did she know Lucius had done that to her son?

No.

She may have done her fair share of crimes, she may have thought of the elves as less than animals, but everything she had done, she did to protect Draco.

"He can't perform the spell like that." Narcissa continued, meeting Olivia'S snarl with unblinking eyes.

"Excuse me?"

"Mr. Potter is tired." Narcissa said cooly, unimpressed by the Aurors glare. "He's not ready for this. Not today."

"Mr. Harry Potter is an accomplished wizard-"

"Who needs to rest." Harry bit his lip, looking between the witches as he sat crossed legged on the floor. Merlin, no one he knew would dare interrupt Olivia… Although, he was pretty sure there were people who wouldn't dare speak back to Narcissa either…

Olivia fumed, her eyes shooting back to Harry who shrunk under her gaze. "Mr. Potter, do you need to rest?" She asked dangerously and it was clear the answer she was expecting. Although the look had been enough to quiet Harry before, he also couldn't ignore the glare Narcissa was sending him either. Well… Fuck.

"Err.. I-"

"Look at him! Does he seem mentally strong enough for this?" Narcissa demanded. _He_y!

"I don't believe I asked for your opinion!" Olivia snapped back. "Believe it or not, Kingsley hired me for a reason… That being, I know a little bit about Legilimency!"

"Yes, and nothing about a child."

"Are you implying that Harry Potter, the most powerful wizard in our time, the slayer of the Dark Lord, is a child?"

"He's barely of age!" Narcissa snapped.

"But apparently enough of a man for you to ask to save your son?" Ouch.

"Alright, both of you, just stop!" Harry pushed himself back up from the floor, his stomach sending out a warning jolt as he stood. "I'm fine." He said sharply to Olivia and then slowly, reluctantly he met Narcissa's eyes and his voice softened. "Really, I'm fine."

"What did you see?" Olivia asked through gritted teeth.

It took a moment for Harry to remember his actual task and he shrugged. "It's not the same as yours. The memory stream… I can't see anything. It's just a blurry mess…"

"Surely there are images. Something you can make out?" She asked in surprise, her anger momentarily forgotten.

"No. Nothing until I enter into one." Olivia frowned, her eyes shooting to Draco before looking intently back at Harry.

"That's not possible… It should have been slower, a bit fuzzy even, but not unrecognizable. " She said. "He's not conscious. He can't hide them."

"He's not hiding them. I can enter into a memory, I just can't make them out in the stream."

"And that is a low level form of occlumency. He's not able to stop you from entering so his mind is trying to confuse one memory with another…" Olivia mumbled. "It's a mediocre attempt, a little more effective than yours actually." Harry glared in response. "It's as if his subconscious is still trying to protect itself… B-But that's not possible…"

Harry winced as Olivia spun to face Narcissa again. "Has he shown any kind of conscious state since he came here? Any movement? Mumblings?" Narcissa shook her head warily and Olivia fell into a brooding silence. "How extraordinary…"

"Are you telling me, Malfoy is subconsciously using occlumency?" Olivia nodded.

"I've heard of wizards being able to… But that's after years and years of building up their defenses. Elders… Dumbledore's age… No one this young…"

Harry looked over at Narcissa, her blue eyes unimpressed, her lips turned upward in a proud smirk. "You knew he was able to?" He asked, drawing Olivia's attention. Narcissa chuckled, unamused.

"Did you honestly think Draco could have survived through his sixth year without being able to defend himself? He was being watched by his fellow students, the Dark Lord, we assumed you and Dumbledore as well. It wasn't just a precaution for him; it was life on the line. Eating, studying… through the most menial tasks of the day he guarded himself.

"For the last two years he's been relying on occlumency,.. It drained him, but in the end, not even my sister could delve into his thoughts… I knew his mind was strong, I didn't think he was still able to protect himself after months in this condition but it seems he surpassed all our expectations."

Harry gawked at that… He had trouble defending himself for more than a few seconds and Draco had been going at it for more than two years now? No wonder he had seemed ill… "He's a slytherin." Narccissa added quietly, her eyes glued onto Harry. "You may not consider him brave, or smart, or loyal, but he survived. If we are good at nothing else it is surviving…"

Olivia hummed something under her breath before she turned back to Draco, her eyes full of some kind of reluctant respect as she looked the blond over. "What do I do then?" Harry finally asked, tearing his eyes away from Narcissa.

"There isn't much for you_ to_ do but go about it as you have been. Until his mind weakens to the point that he can no longer affect your search, you'll have to sift through the memories on your own." She didn't sound reassuring and Harry knew that his way was the least desirable option considering their time restraint.

"It'll take forever…" He mumbled, earning a nod of agreement.

"I'll speak to Kingsley. The rest of your Auror training will have to wait. Starting today Mr. Potter, I think it will be best if you use your time to go through as many memories as you can. It will be tiring. I'll try to teach as much about legilimency as I can, but I honestly don't think we'll be able to get you up to par in time."

"I can't just… summon one to me? Surely there is a way to look for one specific memory?"

"Of course there is a way." Olivia snapped in annoyance. "You however, seem to be incapable of performing it! Did you think my lessons have been for enjoyment? You can't even search through my willingly conscious mind without me holding your hand to each memory. How you're going to untangle the subconscious mess in him is beyond my expertise. We can only thank Merlin you're able to enter any at all."

Harry opened his mouth to argue than shut it promptly with a frown. Merlin was he_ that_ terrible? She sighed and shook her head, trying to even her voice to regard him again. "We'll have to work on things as we go. For now, gather as many memories as you can. I'll think of something…"

He doubted that, but nodded just the same, reclaiming his spot at Draco's side and tiredly raised his wand to mumble the spell once more.

…

Slytherin dorm… It had to be from the look of the green curtains surrounding him and the silver, satin sheets wrapped around his legs. But Harry froze as he realized he-they weren't alone in Malfoy's four-poster bed.

"Dre?" No. God no! That voice…

Harry couldn't help the surge of panic as the bed shifted from beneath him and slowly, reluctantly he looked down to meet the chocolate brown eyes of Blaise Zabini.

"What's wrong Draco?" Blaise asked from underneath the pureblood, his dark eyes full of curiosity and concern. _They _were straddling him, Draco's hands pressed on either side of the brunette's shoulders, the bare stomachs of both slytherins brushing against one another to share a comfortable and lingering warmth that made Harry's face burn. Dear Merlin, not _this_ memory!

Harry cursed, shaking his head, wincing, recoiling in a furious attempt to disconnect himself from the pureblood, knowing full well what he had just stumbled into and feeling immense guilt at the accidental invasion of privacy. This was wrong! So very wrong and Harry forced his own eyes shut, seconds away from flinging himself out of Draco's mind and reassessing his agreement with Narcissa when Draco's thoughts dashed back to Katie Bell and a cursed necklace. _I could have killed her… _

It's not what he had been expecting, and with a frustrated sigh Harry paused, torn between retreating back to the hospital room and knowing this was the closest he had come to relative information on the Malfoy case._ Of bloody course it would be…_

"Dre? Hey…" Blaise called softly, brushing his hand across Draco's cheek and bringing their attention back to him before Harry could make up his mind. "What is it?" Zabini asked seriously, frowning as he propped himself up on his elbows. His face showed full sincerity as Draco pulled away, leaning back on the mattress so he was no longer hovering over his partner.

Harry didn't know if he should feel relieved that they, at least, were no longer touching the other boy, or mortified that the action now allowed a full view of a very naked, very unabashed Blaise Zabini.

"S-Sorry…" Draco mumbled in response although it was clear that he wasn't paying the slightest bit of attention to his… lover? _Just stop it… Stop thinking about it! It doesn't matter! She didn't die!_ And Harry felt Draco's chest clench painfully as his thoughts continued. _But she could have!_

"Draco…" Blaise said impatiently, waiting until grey eyes were on him again before he leaned forward and brushed his lips against the blond's. Harry jumped in surprise, feeling the soft kiss as effectively as if he were the one it was meant for; And for a moment Draco did stop thinking about Katie as he returned the other's embrace. "You're worrying me Dre…" Blaise whispered. "You're not yourself this year… What's He done to you?"

_Don't! Please don't ask me that!_ Draco begged quietly, resting his head on Blaise's shoulder so the other wouldn't see the tears. "Is it your parents? Has he hurt them?" _Of course it's my parents! It's always them… Fuck, Blaise please… just…_And then Harry heard himself… heard Draco whimper and Blaise's arms encircled them tightly. _I don't want to do this!_

Harry felt like he couldn't breathe and he wasn't sure if that was purely himself or Malfoy. It wasn't shock anymore… Harry had always assumed Draco had many admirers… he never thought that some of them were men, but it wasn't frowned upon in the wizarding world… Besides, what did he care who Draco took to bed? Narcissa had told him that he didn't have a romantic relationship with Astoria… He was free to sleep with whoever he wanted.

No, the pain he was feeling was from Draco's own thoughts. The guilt about Katie. The hopelessness of being given the task of killing their headmaster… The fear of not being able to fix the blasted cabinet and the fear that he _would_ fix it and the events that would follow. Would his parents be punished if Dumbledore killed him? If he failed in that sense, they should still be alright shouldn't they? As long as he got the Death Eaters into Hogwarts, the Dark Lord wouldn't care if he died…right?

"Dre, you're shaking…" Blaise whispered, and Harry realized that they were shaking. Merlin, Draco's body felt strained. Weak. He was hungry, exhausted! And the pain that laced through the blond's stomach confirmed Harry's suspicion that he hadn't eaten or rested in days.

"Sorry…" Draco said hoarsely and made himself look into Zabini's unusually warm eyes. "Just tired." It was more than that, so much more, and all three boys knew it. Zabini raised a disbelieving eyebrow but nodded just the same.

"Let's get some sleep then." And just like that the slytherin's midnight activities were forgotten as Blaise lay down and Draco hesitantly followed, wrapping his arms around the olive skinned torso. Harry stared in confusion. Until this moment there was a comfortableness between them… Understanding even, but now Draco's worry about Katie and Dumbledore was replaced with an overwhelming feeling of guilt as Zabini buried his face into the crook of his neck.

"Blaise…" Malfoy whispered sincerely. "I can't love you the way you want me to."

Oh.

Harry winced, expecting an argument, a cry of indignation, but Zabini merely huffed into the hollow of their shoulder. Concern now replaced with annoyance.

"Shut it, you utter tosspot! Did I ever ask you to?" Draco's lips twitched upward in a ghost of a smile. He had expected the reply, hoped for it even and for a moment Malfoy was blissfully unaware of his previous worries. "I'm not as naïve as Pansy." Zabini continued in irritation, sounding for the first time, like the sltyherin Harry was used to. "I _know_… I've watched your arrogant ass all year."

Draco's eyes flickered down to the brunette and Harry felt the strained smirk struggling to remain hidden.

"Conceited prick." Blaise grumbled, successfully pulling the reluctant chuckle from the blond's throat.

A comfortable silence ensued and Harry couldn't help but marvel at their relationship. It wasn't romantic, at least not to Draco. Friendship, no more than what Harry felt for Hermione, but as Zabini's breathing slowly began to deepen and his body relaxed in Draco's embrace Harry knew just how deep their trust for each other went. Despite the fact that the Dark Mark shone mockingly in the dim candlelight, despite the fact that Draco had just fucked his best friend for a distraction; they were laying securely next to one another, cheering and reassuring their partner as best they could.

It was comfort. It was safety. No judgment between the two, no prodding...

Harry shook his head, knowing he had lingered far too long. He was sure he had gotten all he was going to get about Katie and the silence only made him feel like a bigger pervert the longer he stayed. Merlin, if Draco wasn't able to kill him for the invasion of privacy he knew for a fact Zabini would.

He closed his eyes, willing himself to leave when again, Draco's thoughts stopped him.

_Sorry Blaise… I always do this to you. _Harry had to get out. This wasn't for him to hear, but he hesitated as the pale fingers brushed through the brunette's hair. _I shouldn't have let you get so close… Fuck, I can't even do a friendship correctly… _

Harry felt Draco frown as the thoughts progressed. How guilty Malfoy felt now that he had put his best friend in danger. How he had used him... Not just Blaise either. Pansy, Astoria… Merlin what was he doing? He was a Death Eater! He shouldn't be here! He shouldn't be _near_ them!

_Fuck, I'm pathetic! _Malfoy thought angrily, running his free hand over his eyes, causing an uncomfortable darkness to envelope Harry and then… Harry went cold as an image of himself appeared in the slytherin's mind. A fourteen year old Harry, pushing Malfoy up against a tree inside the courtyard, green eyes narrowed in disgust. _'I don't care what your father thinks Malfoy! He's vile and cruel! And you're as pathetic.'_

Oh god.

"Bloody Potter…" Draco mumbled. But there was no anger, just a sadness and self-loathing Harry had only felt one other time in his life. And then… resolution.

Draco leaned down to gently kiss Blaise's forehead and Harry knew… Knew this was the last time Draco would allow himself near Zabini. Knew this would be the last time he would confide himself to the other boy, to anyone… The last time he would touch someone, embrace someone as intimately as he did now … and Harry felt his own heart clench as the lingering kiss sealed this silent promise and Draco cried himself quietly to sleep.

**P.S, I don't think anything I've written so far would account for a raise in the rating of my story but if someone feels like it needs to be addressed please let me know. **

**Don't forget to R and R! **


	7. We Were Just Boys

**I have no excuse for taking so long. This chapter has proven to be my Achilles heel. I am still not exactly happy with it. I've rewritten it so many times, I've lost count but I hope you guys enjoy it. If nothing else at least I was able to get through the things that needed to be introduced and I can stop worrying about how I'm going to add it in. I'm sorry. At points I feel it might be confusing, at other times I feel it may be rushed but I can't do anymore to it. This chapter as really just exhausted me. I never expected it to be so hard. **

**Please let me know what you think! I hope I didn't just butcher it. And as a warning, the memory might get a little disturbing for those faint of heart. Please be warned. As always, thank you everyone for taking the time to read my story and please feel free to offer any constructive criticism. It's always appreciated. And also, thanks for all the reviews, adds, and or favorites. I love you guys. Leave a review and let me know your thoughts! **

Olive had once told Harry that occlumency was more than clearing your mind, it was fortifying it. 'Building defenses', 'constructing mental walls'. "It's about self-control. Security." She had said. But the thought of creating a psychological barrier was far more intimidating than creating a physical one; and he had all but given up on the practice when she explained that it was dependent largely on emotional control.

It just wasn't in him. Maybe because he really was weak. Maybe it was the fear of not being able to express his feelings now that he had people to share them with, but he couldn't suppress his emotions the way she wanted. So what if his occlumency suffered? So what if he was an easy target? It didn't seem to matter, not now that Voldemort was gone...

But as Harry stood within Draco's new memory, watching as Bellatrix Lestrange used legilimency on her sixteen year old nephew, Harry concluded that it did, in fact, matter.

Draco was kneeling in the middle of the Malfoy dungeon, his eyes shut tightly in attempt to ignore the wand pointing at his face; and while Harry began to phase with his former rival he immediately felt the unfamiliar pressure resting against the blond's forehead. It was completely foreign to the Gryffindor, a heavy surface that should have been physical. And though it may have been uncomfortable to someone who had never experienced the mental barrier, Draco seemed unconcerned by the dense presence. On the contrary, all his attention remained solely on the intangible walls and the French chant he had taken on in an attempt to drown out Bellatrix's mocking voice.

"Poor baby! Daddy wasn't nice to you at all, was he?" She chuckled. "What was it that time Draco? Having him cast an incendio spell on you?"

Malfoy gritted his teeth. _Soixante-huit, soixante-neuf…_

It was incredibly hot around them, too hot. The air was thick, stifling… Draco was having trouble to breathe, the smell of burnt hair assaulting his nose and a piercing pain that was steadily crawling up the blond's knees made Harry wince.

How long had he been here? How many attempts had it taken Bellatrix to learn that Draco had been tortured by his father? She must have been able to break into his thoughts at least once before… Why else would she be mocking him with the fire? Why else would she have changed the temperature in the room if not to mess with her nephew's already strained mind.

Despite the fact that Harry disliked not being able to see his surroundings through Draco's shut eyes, he was actually relieved. If the air felt like this, he shuddered to think what image the vision had taken shape to.

"Burning! Burning!" Bellatrix sung. "You're looking a little flushed dear… What's wrong? Feeling feverish?"

_Don't listen! Soixante-dix… There's no fire. Soixante-et-onze… None of it is real!_ But the air had turned to ash, the charcoal fumes knotting in his throat. _Ignore it! It can't hurt you! _

It couldn't? Harry wasn't so sure...This was meant to be practice, a lesson in building Malfoy's mental defense but Bellatrix's idea of legilimency seemed far different than any Harry had ever encountered. Snape had never pulled out a specific memory to manipulate… Olivia had never focused on one of his insecurities to scare and intimidate him with. This wasn't training, it was torture!

Fuck, how could Draco just sit here when it was quite possible Bellatrix had transfigured a fire pit under them? How could he possibly keep his eyes shut, knowing she had drawn her wand? If this was the self-control Olivia had wanted then it was no wonder why Harry would fail in occlumency. Like hell he could just ignore this!

"Tell me Draco, did you hate him? You had to! Really, who sets their own son on fire?"

_S-Soixante…_ The pressure against Draco's scalp trembled, his lithe fingers curling into fists in his lap. _Block her out. Just block her out! _

"How old were you? Five? Six?"

The words were beginning to weigh on him… Harry could feel the sudden change in Malfoy's demeanor. The emotions the blond had been desperate to suppress came crashing against the mental barriers…

This, Harry had expected. This, he knew. The invasive feeling that he had always associated legilimency with… Of course, for Harry it had always been sudden; A hurried, flash of pain that made him relive some of the worst moments of his life. For Draco however, it was gradual.

Bellatrix's presence slowly seeped past the mental walls, tugging, pulling, breaking his defenses bit by bit, word by word… Draco was desperately trying to resist, scrambling to reinforce the damage she was doing but he had nothing close to the experience or skill needed in occlumency to block her completely. Not yet. Not at sixteen.

With ease she hummed over him, causing the air to grow thicker, the heat to burn stronger… Every moment he fought against her advancement was another searing jolt of pain. He was on fire, he had to be!

"Father please!" Bellatrix mocked, her voice turning into a babyish tone. "Please, stop! It burns!" It did burn! Fuck, Harry was gasping from the pain, panic beginning to settle in his stomach as Draco's control wavered and his own terror began to set in. _No! It isn't a real fire! It couldn't be… she wouldn't!_ But Draco's reassurances were empty. Of course she would… It was so like her.

_Don't look. Nothing's there… It doesn't hurt!_ It couldn't hurt! Every admittance let her deeper and deeper inside. Already Harry could feel her prodding through his… Draco's memories. Her presence was almost corporeal, tap-dancing across his brain with proficient ease. "I'm sorry! Please stop! PLEASE!" Bellatrix cried in mock terror. And then, the walls shattered.

Pain. The mind numbing ache flashed across Mafloy's brain, causing his skull to feel as if it were being ripped in two; but it was the sudden wave of molten heat that caused the blond to yelp. If Harry had thought they had been set on fire before, it was nothing compared to the lava like cloak that enveloped them now.

"FUCK!" Harry screamed as Draco's eyes opened and they were met with a wall of dark, red flames.

"NO!" Draco landed on his back with a loud 'thump' as he reeled away from the fire, his previous composure all but forgotten as his hands furiously began to pat out the catching robes.

"You're weak Draco!" Bellatrix's voice called evenly through the haze. "You think you stand a chance against Dumbledore like this?"

He didn't offer a reply; he was already crawling away. _IT'S NOT REAL! IT'S NOT REAL! _"Are you actually trying to run away?" She asked in genuine surprise. "For fuck's sake Draco, you're acting ridiculous!"

_Not again! Please, god not again._ Malfoy thought quietly, tears beginning to fog his vison. Harry wasn't sure what was more distressing, the fact that he couldn't do anything about the searing heat that was following them, or the fact that Draco was thinking over his six year old self caught in a scalding tornado of his father's retributions. "Use your occlumency! Push me out!"

"We've been going at it for hours!" Malfoy replied weakly. "I can't-"

"And you live more than half the year with them at school you idiot! You think Potter or the old man will care how long you've had your guard up? Huh?" She demanded.

But Draco shut his eyes once more, shaking his head and letting out a helpless sigh that caused Harry's chest to clench. "I… I-I don't want this…"

"Sorry, what was that?" She challenged darkly.

"I-I don't want this!"

"THEN STOP ME! Empty your mind!"

But it was too late for that. She had broken through. After everything he had done…. A year's worth of practice, of Severus secretly preparing him for occluemency, of building defenses, of strengthening his mind… He had hesitated… allowed himself to be distracted, took one wrong step and the walls he had spent months constructing had been sliced down like a sheet of parchment. He couldn't stop her now, not when he was this tired, not when it hurt this badly to breathe… "You're not even trying!"

Harry wanted to scream at her. Of course he was _trying_! Draco was fumbling to focus on barricading himself again, his mind literally scrambling to pick up the pieces but Bellatrix had taken over the space that had been his shield, her presence appearing as a jagged knife that seemed to be sawing at his skull. It hurt! Merlin, did it hurt!

"You can't control your mind with brute strength Drakey!" She said in exasperation. "Disassociate yourself from your emotions! Quickly!"

_Soixtante… S-Soixtante…_ Malfoy tried once again, his fingernails digging into the palm of his hand, his chest heaving as he tried to regulate his breath but it was no use and they all knew it.

Bellatrix let out a long, exaggerated sigh. "What is it Draco? Can't do anything without help from mummy?"

Draco's back went rigid at the mention of Narcissa, a silent gasp escaping his lips as the fire receded and the heat quickly followed. There was no comfort from the release of pain however as the flames shrunk back to Bellatrix's side, twisting and flickering in a bright dance. "N-No… P-Please…" Draco murmured, turning his face away before the fire could take on its final shape. Not that it mattered, he knew… Harry knew what shape stood before them now.

"Goddammit Draco! Don't just change a memory! You think this is better, giving me more to hold against you?" Bellatrix roared. "What, all Dumbledore has to do is mention your mother and you'll open your mind up like slutty textbook?"

"Stop it!" Draco demanded, bringing his hands up to his ears.

"Look at you! No wonder your father beat you! You're pathetic!-"

"Stop!"

"Sixteen year old Draco, no better than the six year old brat!"

"SHUT UP!"

"Enough!" Harry snapped in anger. "You've won already!" Hadn't she done enough? Seen enough? There was no more fight left within the blond, no more hope of returning to the mental state he had had hours before... Severus had once told Harry that Voldemort used to take enjoyment from pushing his victims into madness. Was this her goal? Was Bellatrix so sick that she needed to drive her teenage nephew insane? "He's done! Just leave him alone!"

But his voice made no difference as Draco trembled on the floor, his eyes shut and mouth gasping open. _Don't do this. Don't let her! It's not real! Mother isn't- _

The blond's thoughts were interrupted by a gentle hand coming to rest on his shoulder. "Draco, darling? Dear, it's alright now."

But it wasn't alright, it wasn't alright at all and Draco let out a defeated sob before dropping his hands back to his knees and lifting his eyes to meet the vision of Narcissa Malfoy staring worriedly down at him. "Draco?"

"N-No…" Malfoy gasped, shaking his head. "No. P-Please, no more…"

"I'm waiting Draco." Bellatrix called impatiently. _She isn't real. She isn't there. That's not mother. IT'S NOT HER! _

"Draco? Draco, are you alright? Darling you're shivering." Narcissa cooed softly. And then her fingers were running through his hair, her touch solid and warm and reassuring. "Come on dear, let's go."

He wanted to… Merlin knew how badly he wanted to stand and sprint out of the room, maternal vision or not, but he no longer had the energy to lift his wand much less outrun a senior Death Eater… _I'm going to die here… _Draco thought numbly to himself and Harry couldn't even find an argument. There was no possibility of freeing himself of Bellatrix, his brain would burst before he could shake her out of his thoughts and his body was becoming heavier and heavier with each strained breath.

"I'm disappointed in you Draco." Bellatrix finally sighed. "Really, I expected so much more." Of course she did… They all did. He was the Malfoy heir after all… One of the youngest members to have received the Dark Mark… He had been given his own special task from the Dark Lord himself! Oh yes… Draco knew exactly what they expected, and he was tired of pretending that he wanted it… any of it. "Well? Aren't you going to say anything?"

What the bloody hell did she want from him?

"I'm sorry." Draco mumbled pathetically.

It wasn't the reply she had been waiting for, Draco knew that the moment he spoke it but nothing would have prepared him for the roar of anger that caused Narcissa's reassuring palm to retreat from the blond's shoulder. Malfoy's eyes snapped back up to watch his motherly vision stumble back, her face twisting in pain before she was lifted into the air, her arms stretched outward from their sides, her head falling back to let out the most inhumane scream Harry had ever heard.

"NO!" Draco instinctively reached out towards her dangling foot, his skull felt like it was about to burst in two… Harry was barely able to suppress his howls of pain… How the hell was Draco not withering on the floor? "No! Please! I-I understand! I'll work harder, please just-"

"You're not trying Draco. Use occlumency, make me stop!" Harry tried blinking back the tears but Draco's sobs were already wracking his body_. IT'S NOT HER! STOP THINKING! BLOCK HER OUT!_ But the layers were nonexistent and there was no controlling his emotions now; for as much as he knew… as much as Draco knew the vision was just that, a vision, it was far too real to the blond. Was this what would happen if the Dark Lord thought he had betrayed him? Is this the punishment should he fail his task?

Draco's gaze lifted up to see Narcissa's tear stained face, the wail of disappear immediately silenced as her throat began to fold inward on itself. "NO!" Harry wasn't sure if it was his voice or Malfoy's that filled the dungeon but it didn't matter as a gash carved itself across Narcissa's neck, separating her pale flesh.

_NO! NO, NO! IT'S NOT REAL! IT'S NOT! THAT'S NOT HER!_ But as Draco stared in horror at the blood cascading down Narcissa's robes, Harry himself couldn't dismiss the sliver of uncertainty that was creeping through the back of his mind…He had seen her hadn't he? Just this morning_… NO! No! Block her out! Just block her out! It's the same as the fire. Mother is fine!-_

Blood trickled quickly down Narcissa's foot, splattering down onto Draco's arm and Harry could no longer suppress his own cry of terror as the dark liquid began to bubble over the blond's sleeve, turning into a mass of oozing, black spiders that formed to scramble up towards Malfoy's chest.

"ARGGH!"

The arachnids were now streaming from Narcissa's opened throat, her ghostly face now overrun with the tiny creatures. _IT'S NOT REAL! IT'S NOT-_ But the more Draco tried to ignore it the more persistent the spiders became, tickling, biting, burning… Harry was afraid to scream, afraid to move as the they hummed closer and closer to Malfoy's ears, running over his nose, his eyes… Merlin they were trying to get_ inside_ of him, skittering across the blond's vision.

"Your still not trying you idiot!" Bellatrix demanded in annoyance.

"P-PLEASE STOP!" Draco's broken voice filled the room, shrill and helpless. There was no jumble of emotions now, it was pure fear, something akin to a wounded animal and Harry couldn't ignore the sheer terror that was eating its way through Malfoy's stomach.

But if Bellatrix replied Harry didn't hear it, his chest constricted, all the air beginning to squeeze its way out of his lungs. There was a weight that had nothing to do with Bellatrix, a harsh compression that Harry had never experienced… at least not to this extent. He opened his mouth, gaping, gasping… And then the weight was sitting on his chest, pressing down on him like a boulder. It was stronger than Olivia's, stronger than Snape's had been, and he cried out as he was flung out of Draco's memories, his vision going dark as he landed once again on the Hospital floor.

"MR. POTTER! MR. POTTER!"

"I TOLD YOU HE COULDN'T DO IT!"

"SHUT UP!" Olivia snapped, shaking Harry's shoulders. "Are you alright Mr. Potter?" He tried opening his eyes and found the hazy figure of his mentor peering worriedly down at him. "Mr. Potter?"

He didn't reply, he couldn't. The burning in his head was reaching a nauseating degree. Merlin, and he had thought his scar had hurt…

"Mr. Potter! What happened?"

What happened? What bloody happened? Harry growled in response, still not able to force the words out. Fuck, just stop talking! Couldn't they see his head was about to explode?

"Mr. Pot-"

"He fucking kicked me out!" Harry roared, straining his eyes to make out shapes through his foggy vision. Wasn't he wearing his glasses? Nothing should be this blurry, should it? "H-He kicked me out." Harry mumbled and then he gasped as he understood what that meant. "M-Malfoy!" He shot into a sitting position, looking over to the hospital bed and Narcissa's fear filled eyes. Draco hadn't woken, but his body was shuddering as Narcissa pinned his shoulders down, attempting to keep him from rolling off the bed. His arms twitched furiously, his head lolling from side to side.

"W-What-"

Nurses filled into the room, and Harry watched in horror as Narcissa was pushed away from her son and Draco was strapped down to the mattress. "What happened?" Harry demanded above the concerned mumbles of the hospital staff. Olivia's face was pale, her mouth set into a thin line.

"It was too much. He couldn't handle the strain."

"What strain?"

But no one seemed to have heard him as Harry was quite literally hauled off the floor and pushed down on to the bedside chair, his eyes struggling to focus as the nurses mumbled spells and charms over the blond.

Slowly, ever so slowly, Draco's convulsions stopped, the frail chest rising furiously against the sheets. Harry closed his eyes, forcing his head down between his knees to try and hold back the bile that had risen to his throat. "Is he okay?" Narcissa asked from somewhere at Harry's right.

"He'll be fine." A clipped voice said. "No more legilimency for today. He won't be able to handle it a second time…" Oh god… Him? Had Harry done this?

The mumbling eventually died off, the staff slowly filing out of the room after medical tests were taken, and a monitoring charm set up. And as soon as the last person filled out Narcissa zoned onto Olivia, her voice livid. "You could have killed them both!"

"You think I expected this to happen?"

"I told you he was tired! Exhausted! He can't push himself that far!"

"What happened!" Harry roared, looking up from his knees and glaring at the two snarling women. Olivia's face was red, her brown eyes filled with guilt. "What happened?"

"You phased too far into Draco's mind…"

"What does that even mean!" Harry growled. None of it made sense. Phased too far? Strain? What the hell was happening?

"In normal circumstances you are able to feel his emotions through legilimency. This time, for whatever reason, the memory you saw caused a momentary panic through your own body and instead of feeling his emotions, he was feeling yours…"

"He… What?"

"Draco's mind did not only detect his fear but yours as well." Narcissa cut in, her narrowed eyes glaring daggers at Olivia. "Understand this Mr. Potter. You are forming a mental link with my son every time you use legilimency! It does not only affect your brain but his as well! You!" She hissed, pointing an accusing finger at Harry. "… lost control of your emotions and his mind detected and deemed you as a threat. The only defense it has is occlumency."

Had he lost control? Harry fell silent as he thought that over. How he had allowed himself to worry for Narcissa, not only as Draco but himself as well… How he had panicked over the spiders… how he had feared them entering inside of them… Sure he had worried and felt for Draco before in the memories but had it ever been like that?

"Occlumency and legilimency are already abnormal brain activates, but they usually aren't detrimental, usually because most people can detach themselves from one another." Olivia explained. "While Draco was reliving the memories you visited, his emotions were always, purely his own and his mind hadn't detected you as a threat. Now however, his body worked on instinct to remove you… Because he isn't able to consciously defend himself, the forced use of occlumency made him seizure from the new abnormal activities." She finished.

Harry frowned, working the new information into his head before he stood on wobbly legs. "Why now? Why did I lose control now?"

"Because, you're tired!" Narcissa barked in anger. "Your mind is weak! It weakens when it is tired! When it is stressed! When it is unfocused! Occlumency isn't the only spell where you need to clear your mind! You can't perform legilimency correctly because you haven't mastered that vital step of the process!" Her eyes fell accusingly on Olivia, her voice laced with sarcasm. "Please, do tell me if I'm wrong. I, after all don't specialize in it. Merlin knows Kinglsey didn't ask _me_ to teach Mr. Potter. You, obviously, know so much more about it than I do."

Olivia's face reddened, her fists shaking at her sides but Narcissa didn't allow her to reply as she turned back to Harry. "I told you, you weren't ready to go so far today. Not after the work you've been doing with my memories…" It was the closest she would go in commenting on his morning visit and he was relieved at her reluctance of relaying even this much, but he also understood…

She had been trying to warn him with her argument with Olivia. She had known this would happen… Of course she would, when she knew he hadn't slept all night. When he had quite literally had a mental breakdown in front of her only hours ago…

Merlin he was an idiot!

"It's my fault." He said hastily, looking over at Olivia in concern as he understood all of this could have been avoided had he just listened to Narcissa. "Y-You told me during our training that I had to be well rested… I should have let you know I didn't sleep well last night…"

Olivia was shaking, her brown eyes wide as she watched Draco for another sign of a relapse; but upon hearing Harry's confession she blinked back at him, frowning. "No. Mrs. Malfoy is right. I am your mentor and I should have noticed your distress. I am at fault."

He winced at that, watching as she shook her head. "I don't usually work with others. I took this job because I could be alone, so when Kingsley asked me to help you I was hesitant. But you're Harry Potter… you fought off the Dark Lord. I assumed you had prior training so I agreed. Because of this I ignored your condition. I am at fault, but it won't happen again." And with those words she crossed the room, her cloak billowing in an angry cloud of fabric as she passed him. "Go home and rest now Mr. Potter. We'll meet here again on Saturday. Take tomorrow to prepare yourself… And… I'm sorry, Mrs. Malfoy…" She said, not waiting for a reply before she retreated out of the room.

Narcissa mumbled something under her breath before she turned back to Draco, immediately seating herself at her son's legs, turning her back to Harry. It was a dismissal but he couldn't just leave things like this…

"Mrs. Malfoy… I'm sorry. I didn't realize-"

"Obviously." She snapped. "For such a powerful wizard Mr. Potter, I marvel at your complete lack of intelligence!"

He frowned, knowing that he deserved more… Why wasn't she yelling at him? Screaming? Telling him off… Draco could have died couldn't he? "Mrs. Malfoy-"

"Mr. Potter! Please…!" She sighed, her shoulders shaking with the strain it took to calm her voice. Was she… was she crying? "Please Mr. Potter... Just go." Her words were thick with emotions, the proud back trembling as Draco's chest struggled to rise…

Harry couldn't stand it a moment longer. He nodded stupidly before bolting out the door, ignoring his own aching head and Argon's worried call. He needed to get away from them, all of them… Draco and his past, Narcissa and her sobbing shoulders… Away from Olivia, from the vials, from the Aurors…

He didn't bother to use the lift, it wasn't fast enough and he knew he couldn't stand still now. Taking the stairs two at a time Harry hurried down to the first floor panting as he finally came to the large fireplace within the waiting room of St. Mungo's, grabbing a hand full of floo powder and jumping into the green flames.

XXX

"Harry? Dear, are you alright? You look terrible!" Andromeda said worriedly as Harry stepped over the threshold. Having been cleared to pass the wards he nodded and moved forward to accept her hug, sighing tiredly in the motherly embrace. "What on earth happened?"

He couldn't speak right away, his hands, his arms… they were still shaking in exertion, his breath coming out in pants. "Harry?"

"S-Sorry." He mumbled into her shoulder. It was all he could give her without bursting into tears and she seemed to understand because a moment later she nodded and patted his head gently.

"Come in and sit down Harry. I'll make a pot of tea-"

"Andromeda… Thanks but, can I see Teddy first?" She looked at him in surprise, her eyes skimming over his disheveled appearance and he knew she wanted him to explain, but how could he? What was he supposed to say?

"Harry-"

"Andromeda _please_." He croaked, sounding pathetic even to himself. "Please, let me see my godson." He didn't want her worry, her levelheaded answers… He wasn't looking for pity or a shoulder to cry on… Right now, all he wanted was to hold Teddy, to look upon the gentle face that never judged him. Never expected anything from him other than a smile and a hug… That innocence… that warmth…

With a surprised gasp Andromeda searched his gaze, her eyes narrowing in understanding after a moment before she nodded. "Y-Yes, of course. He's in his room."

"Thanks." He mumbled before sprinting up the stairs, not giving her another thought as he hurried to the second floor.

Teddy was resting in the small play pen Hermione had bought from a muggle store. It had taken the trio over an hour and some fix-it spells to put together since none of them had very much knowledge in building muggle furniture, but the result had looked close enough to the box. Now however, Harry ignored the handmade pen and leaned forward to pick up his giggling godson, feeling the tears pool to the brim of his eyes as he scooped the baby into his arms.

"H-Hey Teddy." Harry breathed, feeling a strained smile pulling at the corner of his lips. "Hey Ted."

Light pink hair morphed into black strands, mimicking his godfather's unruly mane as the child's laughter filled the room. "I missed you too." Harry mumbled, his voice cracking between a sob and a chuckle as the little boy lifted his pudgy hands to run across his collar. "Look at you! Feels like you've grown another two inches" Harry continued softly. "You're going to be so tall…"

Teddy gurgled happily in reply. "I wish your father could see you… See how happy you are…" The tears were rushing down his face now, falling quietly onto his godson's onesie. "You're always going to be Happy Ted." Harry gasped, closing his eyes as Draco's terrified voice filled his thoughts. _"Please Auntie Bella… Not her!" _

Harry couldn't understand… Nothing made sense. Draco was her family, her own flesh and blood… How could she have known him the same way Harry knew Teddy and then treat him like that? He couldn't hurt anyone in that manner, never mind a child who he had sworn to protect…

The very thought made Harry's arms tighten protectively over his godson. "No one is ever going to hurt you Teddy!" Harry said fiercly, with Bellatrix's voice cutting into his thoughts. _"Look at you!_ _No wonder you father beat you!" _

Sensing the change in Harry, Teddy stopped giggling, his bright green eyes turning instead, into a stormy shade of blue as he whined in confusion. But Harry couldn't comfort the boy now, not when his memories were flooded not only with Draco's past but his own as well. Uncle Vernon cuffing the back of his head with his fist, Uncle Vernon pulling Harry across the living room floor by his hair, a dark cupboard under the stairs…

"We were just boys!" Harry gasped through a chocked sob, wincing at his godson's let out an uncomfortable whimper. "Boys… Children." Why had that never mattered? How could they have meant so little to their blood relatives? What had they done at six years old to have a father burn his son alive? What had Harry done to make uncle Vernon kick an eight year old Harry in the ribs?

"_You're pathetic!" _Bellatrix's voice wrung out and Harry bit his lip from the memory.

"I won't let that happen to you Teddy! Nothing like that will ever happen to you!" Harry sobbed, bringing the crying child up to his face to nuzzle gently. He would be damned if his godson would ever have to face that… He would rather die than allow Teddy to cry over that pain. That worry that he was never good enough, that he was always in the wrong, that he was some kind of monster his family couldn't stand…

"I promise Teddy!" He cried. His godson would know nothing but love… Would feel nothing but wanted and cared for. If it were the last thing he did… If it cost him everything else in the world, Harry vowed quietly to himself that Teddy would never understand the pain he and Draco had faced in their childhood... "I promise!"

And there Harry kneeled, holding his godson as if he were the most precious thing in the world, crying over memories of his and Draco's past, oblivious to Andromeda listening to his sobbing just outside the door as both Auror and child wept together.

**R&amp;R!**


	8. Deal

**I know, it's been far too long... I am truly sorry, but this time, in all honesty I did just have surgery, with some fairly unfortunate complications that have lead me time and time again to the ER. Writing just hasn't been a priority, and most of the time, I've been so drugged up on pain killers that nothing quite made sense. I still am not too happy with this chappie, I feel it moved a little faster than I intended and transitioning between Andromeda and Blaise was a killer! **

****IMPORTANT**: Because I'm an idiot and didn't think to put this on the first chapter a major, non canon aspect that effects my story is BELLATRIX IS ALIVE. I REPEAT, in this fanfic, BELLATRIX IS ALIVE and **Lucius** was killed in the battle. **

**I don't know how this will effect you as readers, if it will effect your desire to continue or not and I'm sorry. The point was just so natural in my head I didn't see it as something worth mentioning until I was halfway done with this chapter. **

**But as many mistakes as I have made, the above being an incredibly major one, I wanted to thank you all for reading, favoriting, reviewing and just taking the time in general to look at this fanfic. I am already working on the next chapter so it should not be long for an update and I hope the length makes up for some of my shortcomings. **

**SO! My apologies! And please read the above note! My story will not make sense otherwise.**

**As always please let me know how I did by clicking the review button at the end of the page! I hope you all are doing well!**

Harry woke to bright rays of sun shining in through the stained glass window. Groaning, he turned his back to the glaring light then frowned a moment later as he realized that the bed he laid on was not his own. With a start he shot up on the mattress, his eyes scanning the mahogany furniture and yellow and black items that lay scattered about the room.

"Ah." He finally mumbled in understanding, fumbling for his wand to whisper a tempus charm before he slid quietly off the bed. "Eight already… I slept here all night?" His shoes sat neatly on the yellow chest by the foot of the mattress, his jumper folded by their side and he couldn't help but feel touched at the small gesture.

He didn't remember much of anything that happened after he had finally calmed enough to fumble to a rocking chair with Teddy and quell the distressed child. He had soothed and eased the baby into silence until sleep had claimed them both.

That is how Andromeda must have found him before levitating him to Tonks' old room to sleep on her Hufflepuff clad mattress.

Quietly, lest Teddy still be asleep, he dressed and tip toed down the stairs, his senses heightening as the smell of fresh coffee and bacon wafted to him through the kitchen.

"Harry, you're up! I'm glad, I wasn't sure if you had work today so I didn't know whether to wake you or not." Andromeda called sweetly over her shoulder as he appeared in the doorway.

"Ah, no. I'm off today. Thank you. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to fall asleep-"

"Don't be silly dear. You're welcomed here anytime. And really, I'm glad. Do you know how long it usually takes me to get Teddy to bed?" She gave him a grin before turning back to the stove. "Besides, you looked done-in yesterday afternoon."

He frowned at her words, his cheeks flushing as he slid down onto one of the dining room chairs. "I'm sorry about yesterday evening, I owe you an explanation-"

"You don't owe me anything." Andromeda replied gently, looking pointedly at him to show she meant it. "I won't pry, but if there is something you wish to talk about, I'd hope you know you can tell me."

He gave her a thankful smile and she winked at him before accioing a plate to herself. "You are feeling alright now though I hope? You're welcomed to go back to sleep."

"Ah, no, thank you. I've been asleep already for what… fifteen hours?" He mused.

"And you look like you could use a good five more." She said in a tone that reminded him fondly of Mrs. Weasley. "You'll at least stay for a while though? I'm sure Teddy will be excited to spend some time with you."

Harry nodded happily, thinking of nothing more therapeutic than spending time with his godson as a heaping pile of eggs and bacon were placed down in front of him. "Good! Tuck in then! "

Harry grinned at her and happily complied, spearing some scrambled eggs with his fork as she returned her attention to the whistling pot of tea.

And it was in this moment, in the blissful sunny morning, watching her hum and move around her kitchen with practiced precision that made Harry feel almost at ease; as if the incident with Draco had never occurred, as if nothing else in the world mattered but the warming, homely smells and gay company. But then… Just as Harry felt the content wash over him, Andromeda turned, her profile outlined in the sun's rays and he felt his throat constrict, food lodging in his windpipe.

It had been so long since Harry last thought of her as a Black but it was so painfully glaring as to how much she looked to her sister. Although Bellatrix's hair was darker and her eyes colder, the family resemblance was just too much for Harry to take in. With a cringe he looked back down at his plate, his appetite suddenly gone as guilt and unease settled over him.

"… And you should have seen him when he saw a picture of a duck! His nose started twitching and it turned yellow but he wasn't able to morph it like Tonks use to. Colors he can handle, it's the shape that throws him off." Andromeda's voice mumbled sweetly down to him. "He tries… Bless him. I'm just happy that- Harry? Are you alright?"

"I…" He felt his chest tighten guiltily as she turned to him. "I actually do want to talk to you about something Andromeda…" She frowned, her face turning down into seriousness again. "I think you have the right to know… At least some of it."

He wasn't lying. Narcissa and Draco were after all, her family. So they may not have gotten along… So they may not have spoken to each other in years… She had a right to know that he was representing them at the very least.

"Harry?"

"I don't know if you've heard…" He mumbled, his hands dropping down into his lap. "B-But… I've spoken to your sister."

Disbelief flashed briefly across her face, the bright cheeks paling at his words and she gripped her chest. "Y-You have?" He nodded. "W-What… W-When…?"

"A few days ago… I spoke to her at St. Mungo's… She wanted to ask me… You see…" He sighed, biting his lip as he tried to straighten his jumbled thoughts. "Her trial is a few weeks away and she asked me if I would represent her and-"

"You said no, of course?" The anger in her voice made him pause and he looked up to narrowed eyes. Whatever surprise that had been there was now replaced with rage. He could do nothing but blink in confusion. He knew that Andromeda and Narcissa didn't get along, but he didn't think that she had disliked her _this_ much.

"I was going to. Really, I was. But after going through her memories and seeing some of the things she's been through-"

"What she's been through!" Andromeda roared, flinging both her cooking mittens and motherly image off with a snarl. It was the Black family eyes that glared at him now, fierce and cold and filled with betrayal. "What about what she's put us through! H-How could_ you_!?" He winced but she didn't pause long enough for him to stop her. "After everything she's done! S-She's… She! … Merlin Harry, she killed my _daughter_!"

It took a moment too long for understanding to fall over him, but he wasn't able to correct his mistake before she began pacing. "You dare come in here and tell me that you're going to help _Bellatrix_? The dark lord's most loyal follower, the cruelest woman I know; the murderer of my daughter and son in law?" She growled.

"No. Andromeda I-"

"The parents of my grandchild! _Your godson_! You're going to help her stay out of _Azkaban_? Nothing she has gone through can erase what she's done! Nothing!-"

"No! Andromeda! I meant Narcissa, not Bellatrix!" It was as if time had stood still. She froze, her legs stopping in mid-step, her head whipping back to stare at him in seething rage and confusion.

"N-Narcissa?" She asked. He nodded hurriedly in an attempt to fix his mistake.

"Sorry, I should have been clearer! Narcissa was at St. Mungo's to watch over her son. She asked me to take on his and her case."

"Narcissa?" She asked again, her voice becoming softer with each letter of her younger sister's name.

"I'm sorry. No one knows where Bellatrix is, but I would never agree to help_ her_!" The words seemed like enough to calm her because the fury faded slowly from her face as she slid down in the chair across from him.

"Don't ever do that again Harry."

"I'm sorry." He repeated, reaching across the table to give her hand a reassuring squeeze. "Truly, I didn't mean to mislead you." She nodded in acceptance and ran a hand across her face. "Andromeda, I don't think I've ever asked you about Narcissa…but... do you mind if I ask you about your relationship with her now?"

"There was never much of one." She said with a weary sigh. "She, like the rest of my family, believed in blood purity and she berated me on my personal views. Not that it was _all_ her fault…" With another sigh Andromeda finally met his gaze. "Please understand Harry. Narcissa was the youngest out of the three of us. She was mother and father's favorite, doted on by our relatives... favored by her eldest sister... I was considered the family screw-up, a muggle-lover, a disappointment. It's what they taught her, what she saw me as at a very young age and I never tried to change that. In fact, I was rather cruel to her...

"In the beginning, whenever she wanted to converse with me, spend time with me, I was so angry with the others I would lash out at her. It was bitterness, I'm not so proud as to deny that. She was the youngest, favorite after Bella, and me... Well, no one much cared for me and I blamed her for it... despised her for it... Anything that Bellatrix loved had to be evil and Narcissa was the only person I would ever have considered Bellatrix loving... She was six when she finally stopped trying... I think that made me hate her more... If anything_ I've_ always pushed Cissy away...

"The only person in my family who would probably have listened to me, I ignored and shunned."

Harry could do nothing but frown. As he had never had brothers or sisters of his own and had been treated like a bother to the Dursleys as well, he couldn't say much as to having a younger or older sibling. Ron was the closest thing to a brother that he ever had but he supposed it would have to be much different growing up with someone else since they were a baby…

He could understand though, how being ignored and shunned by Andromeda would have caused Narcissa to love her eldest sister more… Harry who had been despised by the Dursleys, considered the Weasleys more of a family than even his blood relations. They loved him, they accepted him, just as Bellatrix had loved and accepted Narcissa.

"When did you stop speaking to her?" Andromeda frowned.

"I cut off all contact with my entire family when I married. I don't think me and Cissy really ever had a falling out. She had made it clear how much she disagreed with my views but she at least treated me civilly. Bella had stopped acknowledging my existence all together, but if anything I'm the one who cut ties with Narcissa. I didn't think she'd miss me though…" He nodded in understanding. "Harry, you said she and her son were waiting for their trial. Does that mean Draco was a Death Eater as well?"

"He did get the Dark Mark but… Andromeda look, I'm not supposed to relay any information on the case but I can tell you that during the war both Narcissa and Draco lied to the Death Eaters, to Voldemort, to save my life. I've been going through their memories through the pensieve and legilimency and… Andromeda I just… everything I knew about them, thought I knew about them is wrong… I don't think either one of them wanted that lifestyle… Neither one of them cared about Voldemort's plans, neither one of them wanted to hurt anyone else. Yes, they had their pureblood views but I don't think they belong in Azkaban."

She looked pained, as if the words were literally causing her physical torment but he needed her to understand what was at stake. "I didn't want to take the case, I didn't want to represent them but I can't just let them go to prison. They were victims as much as anyone else."

"Harry…" It was... sympathy. She felt sorry for him and he knew why. She thought Narcissa was leading him on, thought that he was too naive to see past a mother and son, but she had no idea what his relationship with Draco had been. She had no idea the memories he had watched these last couple of days... A liar, a Death Eater... She saw them as everyone else in the wizarding world did and he knew that changing her view was the first step in changing the others.

"It's true Andromeda! Maybe Narcissa loved Lucius before, maybe she did truly follow Voldemort in the first war, maybe she used to be at Bellatrix's beck and call but this time it was different. Some of the things Voldemort put them through… Some of the things he did to them…" Tears prickled at the back of his eyes once more but he refused to cry this time. "Some of the things Bellatrix did… Andromeda, they don't belong there."

Something must have convinced her for he could see the bit of hope and raw fury rushing across her face. She believed him. Thank Merlin, she believed him.

"Why then Harry. Why did she stay?"

"Where would she have gone? No one from the order would have believed them, me included… The ministry was filled with spies for Voldemort at the time, they would have been found within a couple hours should the aurors try to hide them… Bellatrix was the only family she had except for you and you two weren't speaking…"

Guilt washed over her features. "I didn't tell you any of this to make you feel responsible Andromeda, or bring back old scars but… She's your sister. Your baby sister and Teddy's family…" At her grandson's name Andromeda stood up to pace, her hands wringing themselves in front of her. "I just wanted you to know, they aren't terrible people… Narcissa isn't like Bellatrix..."

"This is a lot to take in Harry… I'm not exactly sure what you want me to say."

"I don't want you to say anything. I just wanted you to know I'll be representing them in their trial and why."

"You really believe they are innocent? Truly?" He nodded. "Then they must be..." She gave him a tired smile before her frown returned. "Do you think they stand a chance at the trial?"

"I don't know. B-But… I'm Harry Potter aren't I? Slayer of the Dark Lord, Boy Who Lived… My word has to count for something right?" They both new that he was trying to convince himself as much as he was her and she tried to look as reassuring as possible but it was clear she didn't have much hope... Well, neither did he, but he had beaten bigger odds in his life... hadn't he?

It was Teddy's wail that broke the silence of the melancholy kitchen. Andromeda moved to tend to her grandchild when Harry waved her to sit back down and hurried up to the second floor instead.

Preparing the baby for the day had always been a treat to Harry, mostly because he enjoyed watching his godson wriggle into his clothes and laugh when Harry attempted to clean his face with a wash cloth. But today it was far more than that... Today, he was just happy for the excuse to not have to look at Andromeda's worried face. Worry he had brought into this household...

It wasn't fair for her to feel guilty, but it also wouldn't have been fair for him to keep something like this from her... Would she have felt just as betrayed when she read about the Malfoy trial in the paper? When she saw Harry standing next to Narcissa... representing her... No, it was better this way... harder, but better.

Upon seeing Harry Teddy fell silent, flaming red hair turning back to his godfather's raven locks as he was picked up and kissed tenderly on the forehead. "You hungry Ted?" Harry asked softly, earning a gurgle in reply as the baby was then taken to the changing table, stripped of his dirty diaper and redressed in proper, baby, day-time attire.

"We'll make this right Teddy." Harry mumbled to his giggling godson. "Somehow, there has to be a way for everyone to be happy... Right?" Teddy let out a joyful "Gah!" in response, causing Harry to laugh loudly, and it was then that Harry realized, it had been weeks since he had actually laughed.

XXX

"Potter? What the bloody hell are you doing here?" Harry couldn't stop his mouth from dropping in disbelief as Blaise Zabini stood from the bedside chair to face him; brown eyes narrowed and cautious as the former Slytherin eyed the boy-who-lived. "Don't tell me _you're_ the auror on his case?" He demanded angrily but Harry could not offer a reply. His cheeks blushed uncontrollably as realization washed over him and Draco's previous memory resurfaced.

A naked Blaise kissing him-errr Draco- on a cold winters night. The feel of the lithe body under him and the smell of sweat and sex filling his head… _Oh god…_

"I… Errr, I…" The words seemed abandoned in his throat as Harry 's eyes began to search the room for something else to look at. The fiery glow of the monitoring charms above Draco's head, Narcissa's abandoned coffee thermos resting on the bedside table, a pair of fuzzy, off-white slippers placed below Malfoy's bed, lying untouched on the floor. "I…"

"Oi! Potter!" Blaise snapped impatiently. "What the hell is wrong with you?" It wasn't exactly unwarranted, from what Harry had observed, none of the Slytherins appreciated being ignored, and he was downright desperate not to meet the other's eyes.

"S-Sorry…" Harry finally managed, running his hand through his hair uncomfortably. "Sorry, I didn't know he had company. I-I'll come back later-"

"The devil is going on with you?" Zabini barked before Harry could dart out the room. "For fuck sake, look at me when I'm talking to you!"

Harry did look at him then and regretted it immediately as understanding seemed to seize the other boy. Blaise's body became stiff in anger and with a snarl he took a threatening step forward. "What the hell did you see?"

"See?" He tried feigning ignorance but he may as well have been holding a sign that read 'guilty as charged' for all the patience Zabini seemed to have.

"Don't give me that! Narcissa told me the aurors were using legilimency on him. If you're here, that means you're the one going through his memories right? Now, what the hell did you see?"

There wasn't any reason left to deny it at any rate so he sighed and held his hands up in surrender. "Look, I didn't mean to stumble onto anything with you in it. It's not my business, I promise nothing between you two will leave this room-"

"What. Did. You. See?" Blaise repeated through gritted teeth, his hands balled into fists at his side. Was he actually considering fighting him? It's not as if Zabini had his wand, Argon was supposed to take away any belongs from the visitors. If Blaise really did want to go head to head it would be an outright brawl and Harry wasn't sure he was as confident in his physical strength as he was in his magical one.

"You and him…you two were... in the dorm room…" Harry finally mumbled out awkwardly, aware that he probably could have phrased it better, but not really sure how.

Blaise frowned before taking another step forward. "If you dare tell _anyone_-"

"I wouldn't! It's no ones business that you two were intimate-"

"For fuck's sake Potter, you are an idiot!" Zabini barked. "You think I give a damn that others know I loved him? As if I should be ashamed of that?" Harry shrunk back in confusion, not sure what he was talking about any more. "Merlin, it's like talking to a wall!" He hissed in annoyance. "I don't care if you know I slept with him, I meant, if you tell anyone how… how broken he was… that he was..._crying_… I swear to Salazar I'll finish where the Dark Lord left off!"

Oh.

Harry shook his head immediately in understanding. "I won't! I wouldn't do that!-"

"Please!" Blaise snarled. "Cause you're so virtuous right? As if you haven't already gone to the Weasley girl and told her all about _poor little Draco_!"

"No!" Harry said firmly. "We may have hated each other in school, but I wouldn't do that to him now."

Zabini stared angrily at him, but he either didn't have an argument, or decided it was wiser to let the whole conversation go because he turned his back to Harry, sitting at the foot of Draco's bed just as Narcissa had done two days ago.

It was getting tiresome... Insulting really, knowing that two people who he had disliked so very much, didn't see Harry as much of a threat when he was quite literally the only one in the room able to perform a spell. In fact Harry wanted to stomp over to Blaise and shake the brunette senseless! He had killed Voldemort! Survived the 'Tri'wizard tournament, fought off a basilisk, went head to head with a werewolf for Merlin's sake, and Zabini was threatening _him_!? Just because he was Malfoy's lover-

Harry closed his eyes and willed himself to take a deep breath, knowing that he did not want to let his mind take him down that road yet again.

There was an even greater annoyance every time he thought of the two men together...

He didn't know why, didn't see anything wrong with their relationship...He shouldn't have cared one way or another, but having Zabini sitting in here, taking Narcissa's place at the pureblood's side... lounging around the hospital room as if he owned it... Caused an angry ache to begin in Harry's forehead.

"Why you?" Blaise finally asked in a harsh whisper, bringing Harry's attention back onto his present self. "Why did it have to be you on his case?" Harry saw no point in lying so he gave a shrug.

"Narcissa said she would only cooperate if I did it."

Shock filled the brunette's face, his head whipping back to look at him again but when Harry offered no further explanation Zabini looked defeatedly back at the unconscious blond.

"I guess she knows what she's doing then." Harry couldn't think of a reply as the awkward silence settled again. Clearing his throat he motioned to the door.

"Sorry I bothered you. I'll come back-"

"I'm only here because Narcissa asked me to stay while she went to her hotel and showered." Zabini replied. "Do whatever you have to Potter. I'm not planning on leaving just because _you're_ here. Besides, I'm sure the great Gryffindor has other plans for the day…"

Harry bit back a snappy retort of his own. He knew Blaise had every right to be upset with him… He had, after all, just admitted to watching both Slytherins in bed together, and it's not as if he and Draco were anything close to friends in Hogwarts... He knew he shouldn't take the ire too personally but Harry's temper was running thin to begin with. Besides, Olivia was due in the room in less than ten minutes and she would only reprimand him for being late if he did leave. Sighing, Harry walked over to the bedside table, removing his jumper and letting it rest across the surface.

"I can't really do anything until the other auror gets here." Harry admitted, earning a snort of disapproval. "Look, I won't bother you so just… do whatever it is you usually do."

Blaise watched him warily through the corner of his eye as Harry made his way to the window, looking out at the cloudy morning sky and wishing he was still asleep with Teddy in his arms.

"You're not going to find anything." Zabini finally mumbled after a couple minutes. "In his memories. You won't find what you're looking for."

Harry wasn't sure what came over him, why the anger burned through him as strongly as it did now but he glared in annoyance at the Slytherin. "Because you know what I'm looking for?"

If Blaise was surprised by the outburst, he didn't show it. "I know you want to send him to Azkaban. I know you hate him, always have, but he's not the monster you think he is."

Silence… Harry wasn't sure how to respond now, as he himself had found that to be true. There was far more to Draco Malfoy than met the eye, but a few good deeds didn't forgive all the bad decisions either. Still, the sincerity in Blaise's voice caused Harry's own temper to wane "I don't want to send him to Azkaban Zabini. I'm just doing my job. I'll report everything the way I see it in his memories. As of yet, I haven't seen anything that would send him there."

Now Blaise did seem surprise as he looked back at him. "I can be unbiased you know…" Harry mumbled, slightly offended at the disbelief from the other.

Zabini seemed to think that over for a moment before turning back to Draco. "He used to admire you, did you know that?"

Harry froze at the Slytherin's words, immediately thinking he had heard wrong but Blaise's annoyed voice was laced with… jealousy? "First year… You're all he would talk about. The great Harry Potter, slayer of the Dark Lord… His father had told him that you must have been an incredibly strong wizard to be able to defeat Him as a baby. Draco was drawn to power, he lusted after it so when he saw you, realized it was you, he wanted to befriend you.

Harry gawked at the boy before him but Blaise didn't look his way again.

"When you turned him down, he was angry. He thought you were a stuck-up prat quite honestly."

"_Me_?" Harry asked incredulously. "_Me_? He thought _I_ was stuck up?"

"What did you honestly expect? Rumors had always surfaced that Dumbledore kept you hidden as his own secret weapon. We assumed you had been trained by the old man since your parent's death... And Draco said you seemed dejected... pompous even, when he tried to talk to you that day at Madam Malkins. He assumed you thought yourself too high and mighty to associate with the son of a mere 'Death Eater' and that's why you turned him down... You can imagine his anger however when he saw how close you became with the Weasleys."

Oh…

OH!

Harry could do nothing but gape in surprise. Draco had assumed _he_ was the stuck up, privileged prat? Which, he supposed, knowing what he knew now, would make sense. Draco had been tormented by his father since he was a child, had probably been looking to befriend Harry to impress Lucius, and then been shunned for Draco's least favorite pureblood household… Harry supposed, had their places been reversed, he would have assumed the same thing…

"My life wasn't nearly as glamorous as he thought." Harry finally mumbled miserably.

"He knew… Later on, it was easy to figure out. Besides, with as terrible as you were with potions and spells, it was obvious you weren't previously trained. But Drake holds grudges, if you haven't noticed..."

"Yeah…" As if he could miss that... "You knew him better than anyone, didn't you?" Zabini's previous wariness returned.

"I'd like to think so…"

"Every time I saw him... from sixth year on... you weren't around…" Blaise scoffed.

"You still don't get it Potter. He wouldn't let _any _of us near him. Since the end of sixth year, he shut us out. Me, Pansy, Astoria, all of us… That night, between me and him, it was the last time… the last time he let me in. The last time where he was allowed to be _Draco, _not a Malfoy but _Draco_... You don't know what it's like... what the title entails... but he was terrified what they would do to us, if the Death Eaters found out we were his friends… If they found out I slept with him…" Zabini fell silent, the words seeming to stick in his throat, and Harry couldn't help but finish for him.

"He was protecting you." Blaise scowled.

"Do you have any idea how hard it was for him? Did you ever stop to think? He was falling apart. He stopped caring about his classes, about quidittch, his grades plummeted… He stopped eating, he barely slept, and when he did, he'd wake up screaming because of the nightmares... _I_ watched him, since sixth year, crumbling into this… this ghost of a man he is now, but he refused help. He said he wouldn't get me involved, that he wouldn't risk it, wouldn't forgive himself… " Blaise looked close to tears as he stared fiercely up at Harry.

"He broke it off with Pansy, stopped talking to Astoria altogether, practically ran away every time he saw me coming, all because he didn't want the Death Eaters to target us for being his friend..." Blaise stood to look evenly at him, his eyes narrowed and determined. "I get it okay... I_ know_. You had it hard fighting off You Know Who but at the very least you had the Granger and Weasley; Hell, even _Crabbe_ had _Goyle_! But Draco? He didn't have anyone…"

Harry's chest tightened like a noose as the words struck him and he couldn't help but to think back to Ron and when he had left the camp… That had been like a knife in his heart, he couldn't even imagine how he would have gotten by if Hermione had followed… They had been his rock, his last shinning bit of hope… Even with the fighting and anger, even with the sadness and pain, they had been there, had always been there…

"C-Crabbe and Goyle…"

"Were nothing but spies!" Blaise spat. "They watched his every move, lost any kind of respect they ever had for him. They weren't his friends. They would have sold him out in a minute if they thought he was going against the Dark Lord and you know that."

The words caused another painful ache to shoot through Harry. He knew Draco hadn't trusted the two lackeys; and in the end, they surely hadn't heeded the Slytherin's demands as they may have done years ago but he hadn't really thought they would have sold Malfoy out. Not really… If what Blaise was saying was true however, it did nothing but make Harry's sympathy for the blond even more prominent. Draco really had nothing left…

"Not that you would ever have cared." Zabini grumbled bitterly. "No one did."

"If he had said something…" Harry began, instantly knowing it was the wrong thing to say.

"Like what Potter? What should he have said? Who the hell would he have told? _He_ was living with them! _He_ had Narcissa held hostage in the manor the entire time Draco was at school. Crabbe, Goyle, Severus, Dumbledore… They were all watching him, all waiting for him to screw up one way or another. Drake lost his standing in Slytherin, the Malfoy's fell from grace in the pureblood community. No one cared about him anymore. For fuck's sake, he couldn't even go to the bathroom without someone monitoring his movements! And he was terrified!

"Terrified of_ looking_ guilty, of saying the wrong thing, of taking too much time to do something; terrified that each owl that came was the one that would say his mother was dead because he slept in that morning! Don't you dare tell me he had a fucking choice Potter! He was adopted into the life of a Death Eater the minute he was born and there is no getting out of that.

"And yet you, you stand there, looking at him like all the others. Pity and disgust, like he's some sort of rabid dog who needs to be put down. You're supposed to be the god- damn hero, but where the hell were you when he needed you? Where was your sense of justice when they crucioed him? Because we were Slytherins we didn't deserve to be saved?" Blaise spat incredulously.

"I _never_-"

"You never what? Thought about it? _Cared_? You're all alike. Even Mcgonagall… That day… Pansy wanted to give you up, and I agree, she was wrong, but suddenly all the Slytherins were a liability? We weren't allowed to fight? What? Just because You Know Who was one of us, we were all automatically guilty? None of us had the chance to redeem ourselves Potter! None of us were able to fight for our families. To avenge our loved ones! You'd don't think Daphne wanted to get back at them for her parents? For her sister? You don't think the Rossi fifth year wanted to fight them after they tortured his grandparents for information?" He was then pointing back at Draco, his chest heaving in anger. "You don't think_ I_ would have liked to curse them for turning Draco into_ this_?"

The words caused a cold dread to envelope Harry. He had never thought of the Battle of Hogwarts in that way. At the time, he had been glad for Mcgonagalls decision, but now…

"Don't tell me Draco could have said something! Don't tell me anyone would have helped him, helped _us!_ He did what he had to do to keep himself and Narcissa alive! He protected us as well as he could! Sure it may not have been the most ethical, most orthodox method but he did what he could with what he had! He doesn't deserve to be lying in this bed! He doesn't deserve Azkaban! And you have no right to stand here and judge him! _You_ don't deserve to know his memories!"

The words rang out angrily but tears had risen to the brim of Zabini's eyes, the olive face scrunched up with hurt. Harry was not sure what to say, or if he could say anything that would not make the situation worse but Blaise was waiting, wanting, needing something in return. "I'm sorry…You're right, I never did think about it…"

"Tch!" Blaise hissed angrily, glaring off to the other side of the room.

"I'm listening now." Harry pressed, the guilt in his voice surprising even himself. "I'm willing to help if you just give me something…"

"What the hell do you want me to say?"

"Everything! Anything that might prove his innocence. Something he might have said or a time you saw him with the others-"

"_I told you_, he wouldn't allow me into that part of his life." Blaise said in annoyance.

"You didn't ever force your way into it?" Harry asked incredulously. "Never eavesdropped? Followed him?" Zabini looked affronted at the very thought.

"He trusted me with that at least Potter, trusted that I would do what he asked. I don't know how it is for Gryffindors but when one of us gives our word it's as sacred as an unbreakable vow. He begged me not to get involved, told me it would only make things harder for him so I promised… I promised I wouldn't question anything he did, promised I would stay out of it and I_ did_ that."

Harry didn't know what else to say. That type of loyalty seemed more like a Hufflepuff trait than a Slytherin one but saying so would only anger Zabini more. And, maybe he was right, if Harry saw either Ron or Hermione falling so miserably apart, word or not, he would have looked into it.

Another thought struck Harry and though he knew it would only cause more ire between them he had to know. "What about Pansy?"

Blaise fumed. "_What about her_?"

"She was close to Draco too wasn't she? I mean… until the… errr… the memory, I thought he.. you know… had a thing for her… Would he have told her anything?" Blaise shook his head in disgust.

"Draco broke it off shortly after sixth year started. It was the same, he didn't want her involved and he didn't want her used against him… She took it hard but he never really loved us the way you expect Potter. He didn't have that kind of romantic connection with_ anyone_. Not me, not Pansy… We were cared for, treasured, not lifelong partners.

"But Pansy was pissed with him for a while, woman scorned and all that… He wouldn't have told her anything about his time with the Death Eater. _That_ I can assure you." A heavy weight seemed to roll on top of Harry's chest.

"He really did have no one then…?" It was too much for Harry to take, he couldn't help but turn from Zabini, blinking back tears as he looked at the window's curtains. He knew what it was like being alone, not having anyone to talk to, not having anyone to go to… It was how he had spent the first eleven years of his life; but abusive guardians were one thing. The stress the Slytherin would have gone through… No wonder… No wonder Draco confided in Myrtle…

_MYRTLE! _Harry almost squawked out loud, his eyes widening as he remembered everything that had happened in the bathroom in sixth year and Myrtle's reaction to his curse. Harry hadn't been at Hogwarts all of seventh year so he hadn't heard from the ghost in a while, and he doubted a jury would put much stalk in what _she_ had to say but if nothing else, it gave him at least one person who had conversed with Malfoy when no one else had...

"… then I'll do everything I can." Blaise's voice brought Harry back to the hospital room in a swirl of confusion.

"S-Sorry, what?" He asked as he turned back around to face the brunette.

"I said if you're serious about this…. I'll get whatever information on him that I can. He didn't confide in any of us but there are things I took from the dorm… Journals, books. Maybe they have something you need…"

Journals? The very idea seemed foreign to Harry, as he had never thought of ever writing any of his encounters down… Although, thinking about it now, they would probably give him some information about the cabinet and his occlumency... Maybe Olivia could find something about breaking through his subconscious barrier...

The slightest bit of hope brought a tired smile to his lips, but more than that, it was the relief; that for all the anger and annoyance Zabini seemed to have for him, he trusted Harry. Enough that he understood he was trying to help. It wouldn't be anywhere closer to friendship than a cat and water but at least he had one person willing to give him a hand, if for no other reason than to help his lover.

Harry gave a grateful nod. "Thank you. I'd appreciate it. And now that we've talked I do think I may know of someone else who can help." Blaise looked as if he wanted to ask who this someone else was but seemed to decide it wasn't his business before simply nodding.

For a moment there was a comfortable silence between the two as they looked each other over, Harry grinning at the calmness of the Slytherin and then he held his hand out to shake Zabini's.

He expected to be shunned, to see disgust and anger well up in the chocolate eyes but Blaise snorted while motioning to the Gryffidnor's palm. "You're serious?" Harry nodded in reply. "Be warned Potter, I'm helping you because I guess I agree with Narcissa that you're probably the best chance he has. You're the only one whose listened this much at any rate... And if you can cry for him... I guess that means you can sympathize with his situation... but do _anything_ to embarrass them, use any of their memories outside the trial… tell anyone about his or Narcissa weakest moments and I will destroy everything you care about."

"Understood. And if you do anything to jeopardize this case because of whatever feelings you have for me, I'll lock you up in Azkaban until you're too old to hold a wand." Harry fired back easily. "Quiet frankly I'm not sure how close you and Draco were, I saw one memory but I don't know anything about your relationship besides that night so string me along and I'll make you just as sorry...deal?"

It was the first time Harry had seen the Slytherin smile, a gentle tug pulling at the corner of his lips that made it quite easy to see the veela influence inside the brunette. He was attractive, that was undeniable, but there was this gentle, mischievous glint that held the Gryffindor's attention.

"Are you sure you weren't supposed to be a Slytherin?" Zabini finally asked.

Harry laughed at the response, not about to tell him how close the sorting hat had come in placing him in the house. But a moment later Blaise took his hand, shaking it firmly as he nodded. "Deal."

**Incredibly done with sadness for now, thought we all deserved some cuter, lighter memories of Draco in the next chapter. Astoria and Draco up and coming! R&amp;R**


	9. Everything I Know

**Here we are, a little bit better time wise!**

**As always, thank you guys for the favorites, follows and reviews! **

**So this chapter showed a nicer, simpler side of Draco but I don't want to deviate too far from his canon self. He's still a bit of a jerk so you'll see his Malfoy moments and his Draco moments throughout the story. I look forward on working harder on his character development. Hope you guys enjoy! Leave a review and let me know what you think!**

Harry held his breath as he spiraled into Draco's memories, falling roughly into a padded armchair in the middle of Slytherin common room. It must have been their fifth year for the blond still looked relatively healthy as he lounged across the couch, one leg bent to prop up his potions book and the other stretched out to the edge of the armrest. Harry wondered then how such a natural position could look so regal, how Malfoy could call attention to his aristocratic bloodline by simply _sitting_. Merlin, it was damn near infuriating, seeing the blond fully relaxed in his school clothes when Harry had always rushed to the common room to undo his outfit. Every hair in place, every stitch in line… Merlin, his robes weren't even _wrinkled_ despite the fact that he was sprawled on top of them.

With a sigh Harry tore his eyes away from Malfoy and let his gaze shift through the room and he realized, quite belatedly that they were alone. It was unusual, considering Harry had rarely seen Gryffindor tower empty, and had it not been for the melancholy green lighting and skull lined architecture, he might have considered it calming. But how Draco could possibly feel at home in this dungeon was beyond Harry's comprehension, especially now that he had witnessed the rooms of Malfoy Manor to be much brighter than expected.

It wasn't until a moment later, when Harry began to merge with the fifteen year old did he understand. Through the peripheral of Draco's vision Harry could see the change in the chamber, how the emerald lighting turned brighter, how skulls and bones morphed into a more sleek and modern arrangement of silver and green furniture. Instead of the usual leather chairs there were grand chaises with elegant embroidery and green, velvet cushions. The snake-like decor was exchanged for a huge glass window that appeared behind the blond to show off the underside of the lake, letting Harry catch a glimpse of the Giant Squid before the dungeon door opened and Draco looked up from his book.

So that was it… Slytherin common room wasn't terrifying… it had to be a glamour charm, or something similar to make anyone not belonging to the house feel uncomfortable. Of course! As if Lucius or Narccisa would have allowed their son to be subjected into a grimy dungeon… It was almost laughable now to think about his first impression of the dorm in second year as Harry took in the new furnishings.

"There you are Draco!" Harry watched as Astoria Greengrass glided into the room, violet eyes shining warmly over to them, and he had just enough time to take in her thick winter robes, and the snowflakes that frosted over her midnight hair before a piercing cold slapped Draco fully in the face.

The pureblood let out a breathless gasp as ice particles slipped down the front of his cardigan and nestled down under the collar of his shirt. "ASTORIA!" Draco roared as he reached up to shake the snowball away from his eyes.

A moment later Harry watched in surprise as the textbook fell forgotten to the floor and the blond bolted from the couch, reaching out to grab her before she could run away. Astoria let out a playful scream as they gripped her forearm, but Draco ignored the cry and shoved her gently down onto his previously claimed spot on the couch.

"NO! DRACO NO! I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY!" Astoria pleaded as she began to crawl away but in that moment Malfoy was straddling her, pinning her arms down above her head, glowering in triumph as his free hand traveled under the hem of her shirt. For only horrifying second Harry wasn't sure what the pureblood's intentions were but then Draco did what Harry had never expected him to do…

He tickled her.

It was a far cry from the reaction Harry had anticipated. He had never seen the pureblood act in such a careless way before, but here he… they were, ignoring Astoria's giggling please as she wriggled and struggled under him, her face a lovely flushed shade as she laughed. And Malfoy himself was just as happy, taking full enjoyment from her chiming voice and halfhearted protests until she looked close to hysterics and he finally decided to show some mercy.

Finally releasing her hands, Draco leaned back on his knees, smirking as she tried to compose although all she managed to do was roll dangerously close to the edge of the couch. "T-That w-was unfair Draco!" She finally gasped, shuffling to lean her weight against her elbows to look at him.

"You hit me in the face with a snowball!" Draco said defensively. "As if I'd let that go?"

"Alright, alright, I've apologized already though." She giggled. "Now get off me."

He chuckled and then stood, offering his hand to help her up and Harry smiled to himself as the two aristocrats took a moment to straighten themselves out. It was then, as Draco shook the creases from his robe that Astoria blinked down to the floor, her eyes falling on the potions book before she frowned. "You're studying? _Again_?" His gaze followed hers and he nodded before reaching to pick it up. "Draco, you already get the highest marks in potions. Can't you take a break just once?"

"If Severus notices I'm slacking he'll tell father…"

It was enough to silence her and the action made it clear to Harry. She knew. She knew about Draco's home life… or at the very least, his relationship with Lucius; and she knew better not to push it because a moment later she flopped back down on the couch and sighed. "It's freezing." She mumbled as way to change the subject. "I wish Spring were here."

"You just like the flowers." He said with a scowl, grateful despite his tone as he began once again to open the book.

"And you just like the cold for more excuses to stay indoors." She drawled.

"You make me sound like a hermit. I have you know I go out plenty. I am a seeker."

With a grin she leaned over, letting her head flop onto his lap and Draco did nothing but lift his book to give her room before he began to read again. "Can annoying Potter count as going out?" She mumbled, causing an annoyed flicker to erupt in Draco's chest before it was quickly cast aside. He straightened in his seat, clearing his throat to show his irritation and let his eyes fall back down to the text, earning a soft giggle.

She remained silent for some time later, letting him study in peace and eventually Harry found his now pale hand stroking through her hair absentmindedly. But still, even through memorizing one potion after the next Draco would look at her through the corner of his eye, always taking in her soft features; the slight round of her chin, the sleep lidded eyes that fluttered in an attempt to keep herself awake... Harry had the same thought Malfoy did as they watched her. '_She's beautiful_.'

Snow had melted into her hair and robes, small, cool splotches eventually catching the purebloods attention as he realized she hadn't removed her outerwear.

"I had every intention of going back outside." She said, as if reading the thoughts barely forming in Draco's mind. "You weren't supposed to start putting me to sleep." He snorted in reply. As if he had been the one to come in here, throwing snow balls and laying down on top of _her_. "Read to me." She finally insisted, shuffling around until she was lying on her back, looking up at him with her round, pleading eyes.

"A potions book?" Harry heard himself ask, instantly knowing that he would have to… As if he… errr Draco had ever able to say 'no' to her with that face. "Why the bloody hell do you want me to read you a potions text book?"

"I like your voice, it's soothing." She snuggled closer to his side, resting her cheek against the flat of his stomach and closed her eyes. "Hurry up."

Harry was awaiting the annoyed bark, the demanding words that would remind her that he was a Malfoy, that he didn't take orders from anyone but Draco's body was humming in amusement as he surveyed her, a smile spreading across his face as he chuckled and then bowed his head. "Of course Princess." The blond drawled sarcastically. "Would you like a blanket and tea as well? Perhaps I can lay on the floor as your footstool?"

"No, no." She mumbled happily. "Reading is fine for the moment. Scones for when I awake would be lovely though." They gave her a playful nudge that she returned and then Draco did begin reading again, ticking off the list of ingredients for a Bloodroot Potion.

But Astoria didn't close her eyes to nap, Harry watched her watch Draco through the side of the blond's vision, her violet eyes big and beautiful and a little sad as she stared. And Malfoy was aware of her gentle gaze though he didn't stop reading until she reached up a soft palm and laid it against their cheek, Harry feeling himself blush at the all too affectionate touch. "Draco…" She whispered in all seriousness. "Do you love me?"

Harry was fully aware that this memory was probably one he shouldn't be witnessing either but Malfoy didn't pause long enough for him to turn and leave. In fact there wasn't a moment of hesitation before the blond replied. "You know I love you Tori."

And it was all so easy, easier than Harry had ever thought those two words could be, because they were true. Simply and utterly true and though Draco had always been able to easily lie to the rest of the world, he could never lie to her. "I love you too." She said, just as self-assured and as calm as him. "But not… Not like a_ lover_. You know that right?

He nodded in understanding. It was good because there was nothing romantic towards her either. They had always been more than friends, their relationship was different than that, stronger even than brother and sister, but not lovers, never lovers and while Harry- Draco knew he would fight, die, _kill_ for this girl, he could never lust after her the way couples would. He could never be attracted to her the way he had seen the boyfriends and girlfriends, could never think of kissing her with the raw, fiery passion that came to mind when he thought about a 'true love'; He could never touch her in more than the innocent manner he had today and he knew the feeling was mutual. "I don't expect you to have those feelings for me just because our parents thought we should." He said instead.

"I know." She replied. "Nor was I so arrogant as to believe you wouldn't want another woman. In fact, I was relieved when you started dating Pansy…" He nodded again. "But I'm happy. I'm not attracted to you like that but there aren't many other Purebloods out there that can say they married their best friend."

Harry felt Draco's lips curve into a smile, happiness welling in the pureblood for the first time since Harry had entered the memories. "You're such a Hufflepuff." He drawled, but before she could offer back her own sarcastic remark Malfoy leaned down, pressing his lips softly onto hers in the most innocent kiss Harry had ever experienced.

And they both knew it wasn't meant as anything more than that, a simple, chaste kiss and Astoria beamed up at him as he pulled away, taking the text book from his hands to look through it on her own. And Harry couldn't help but smile as she began to read the instructions for the potion, Draco feeling nothing but content as he relaxed against the backing of the couch, Harry's eyes tracing every line of her face, Draco's hand running gently through her cloud of hair...

And that's how Harry left them, pulling himself back into the memory stream, not able to help the joy and sorrow as he thought about how much the two Slytherins had cared about one another and how sadly their friendship had ended. He couldn't imagine now, the guilt Narcissa had felt… Couldn't imagine the betrayal and anger Malfoy must have had towards his mother…

Brushing those thoughts aside Harry reached into the next blur, instantly finding himself seated in the Great Hall, feeling incredibly out of place as he faced the Gryffindor table, looking over at his own, fourth year back as he and Draco became one again. _What the bloody hell Potter! _It was Draco's first thought as Harry merged with him and it took him quite by surprise as frustration mounted in the blond's chest. _Why are you just _sitting_ there! _

Before Harry could discern more from Malfoy's reaction, a quiet cough called the blond's attention and Draco turned around in his seat, meeting the eyes of a short, Hufflepuff-clad girl. Brown orbs widened in shock as the first year seemed to realize who she was standing in front of and with a hiccup she burst into what looked like a second round of sobbing, her pudgy hands reaching to wipe at her runny nose, causing Malfoy to back up slightly in disgust before he looked up at Astoria and Pansy, both who had taken a position on either side of the girl.

"What have you done now?" Draco mumbled in dismay, looking from one Slytherin female to the other. _You've got to be kidding me! I don't have time for this! _The pureblood thought in annoyance, doing his absolute best to ignore the sniveling mess in front of him.

"She was crying in the girl's bathroom." Astoria replied defensively. "Draco, we couldn't just leave her." Well Harry… Draco hardly thought that was the case, and after taking another reluctant look over the Hufflepuff he said so.

"Are you absolutely certain you couldn't? I imagine you weren't trying hard enough." Harry felt himself flinch away from the twin punches, Pansy catching him on the arm and Astoria hitting him surely below the ribs, causing a curse from Draco and another fresh wave of tears from the girl. "Ow! For fuck's sake, what do you want _me_ to _do _about it?"

"Draco, this is Merlo's younger sister." Pansy said, resting her hands on her hips. Harry had no idea what that meant but Draco seemed chastised by the fact, his annoyance quickly giving way to surprise as he looked over the girl a third time. She was a round mess of a thing, her plain face turned ugly with tears, her course hair mused and dusting down her shoulder. It wasn't cold out but she was sporting her Hufflepuff scarf, her thick robes seeming an inch or two larger than she needed.

Sighing inwardly Malfoy met the first year's eyes, his voice coming out in a tone darker than he intended. "Why are you crying?"

He may as well have threatened her with an unforgivable, the way her sobbing turned into a full blown wail. Startled Draco clamped his hand over her mouth, the reaction surprising the pureblood as much as it surprised Harry but he had to keep her quiet. If another house grew suspicious of their meeting there wasn't much of a way for them to hide her. As for the moment Draco was the only shield between the girl and the rest of the hall. One curious onlooker could have Hogwarts in an uproar.

Alright!" Draco hissed, hurriedly, casting careful glances over his shoulder to make sure the other tables weren't paying attention before he regarded the fearful child again. "Alright, stop it. I'm not going to hurt you. Just be quiet okay? You're not in trouble so stop crying."

He waited before she gave a tearful nod before removing his hand, grimacing in disgust as he pulled it away from her wet face. "Two Ravenclaw boys were bothering her." Astoria mumbled as Draco wiped his hand on his slacks. "It doesn't seem like the first time either."

Draco paused, a quick flash of anger coursing through him before became aware of the scowl he must have been wearing. With a sigh he brushed the feeling away and blinked back at the first year who was trembling now. "Why were they bothering you?" He asked.

"I…I-I-" She gulped, looking as if she wanted nothing more than to sprint out of the room. _Damn you Astoria._ Draco wanted to hiss, of course she knew he would have to calm her down, and it wouldn't have been so bad if they weren't sitting in the middle of the entire goddamn hall; but now there was only so much he could do without drawing attention from the other Slytherins; never mind the other houses but the Slytherins themselves would have an absolute field day if word got out that he was coddling a first year.

Sighing in exasperation Draco dug into his pocket for a handkerchief, presenting it to her in what he hoped was a peace offering. "If Merlo is your older brother you know we won't hurt you." Draco said irritably. "How long have those boys been bothering you."

"A while…" The Hufflepuff squeaked, before she began to wipe at her tearstained face.

"Do you know their names?" He asked and this time the girl didn't hesitate before mumbling her reply, shrinking back from him as he nodded in acceptance and then turned to regard Astoria.

"I'll take care of it. Take her back to her dorm." And to the girl he mumbled, "You don't have to cry anymore. They won't bother you again." It was all he allowed her before turning back to his seat, closing the conversation off before starring over once again at the Gryffindor table. He was relieved to see the Golden Trio had finally left.

_Bout bloody time!_ Draco thought with a sigh, hearing the girls shuffle away behind him. As if he didn't have enough going on, now he was supposed to play guardian to a Puff? Not that it was her fault. They owed Merlo, not just Draco, Slytherin in general and though he hated the idea of having to step on anymore toes he hated being in someone's debt even more.

Besides, he said he would take care of it, he never said he'd do it personally…

It was because of this, Harry wasn't surprised that Draco stood from the table, calling down to Blaise who looked as if he were in a very heated discussion with Theodore Nott. Upon hearing the pureblood however Zabini stopped talking, taking one look at Malfoy's beckoning hand before bidding goodbye to the Slytherin table and joining them at the entrance of the Great Hall.

Harry wasn't sure whether to be impressed by the purebloods sway or annoyed by Blaise's obvious doting until he was aware he probably shouldn't care one way or another. He knew however that since the memory between Draco and the brunette Blaise was becoming more and more aggravating to the Chosen One. Perhaps because he knew so much more about Draco then Harry would ever realize, perhaps because he had seen the good in the pureblood when Harry had only focused on the bad, but there was a simmering anger that rested inside the Gryffindor. Something he knew he would have to deal with as it looked like they would be seeing each other more often, but even now the boy caused Harry to roll his eyes as he came upon them.

"Drake, what's with the first year?"

Malfoy wasn't surprised by the question, he knew the table had been watching him and Zabini was no exception. It was good, it meant he wouldn't have to go into too much detail.

"You remember Merlo?"

"Calming Draught boy?" Blaise asked. "Think so, he gave the potion to Millicent didn't he, when she got the news 'bout her godmother?" Draco nodded as they made their way down the corridor.

"His sister has been going through a bit of a rough time…" It was an obscure fact, one Harry would never have found helpful to the conversation on his own but understanding lit the brunette's eyes and Blaise smiled coyly back up at them. "I see... Who, may I ask?"

"Martin… Baines…" Draco replied, using the two surnames of the Ravenclaw boys who seemed to be the root of Malfoy's current predicament. "You've always been one for riddles haven't you Blaise?" The pureblood added, giving his friend an inquiring look.

"A passion of mine, surely." The other replied in amusement.

"Ravenclaw's riddles are supposed to be damn near unbreakable…" Harry gaped. Was he… Was he daring Zabini to break into _Ravenclaw_?

"I do enjoy a challenge." The brunette mumbled, sharing one more plotting smile with the blond before he fell back from Malfoy, melting into the crowd of students like a wisp of smoke.

The memory ended abruptly and Harry wanted to pull at his hair as he was left standing in the stream. What had Draco meant that all the Slytherin's owed Merlo? What the hell had Zabini done to get into Ravenclaw? Had he succeeded? And if he had what did they do to the boys?

It was infuriating, and knowing he didn't have the power to call back the specific event was even more annoying. But… as the memory really hadn't given anything useful, he knew it was best to let it go… Not that he'd easily be able to ignore the fact that Draco Malfoy had just tried to console a Hufflepuff… Or could he ignore the fact that once again, Harry's name was mentioned in Draco's memories… But now wasn't the time. Later, tonight, when he was meant to be sleeping, he would allow each moment to be replayed over and over again. He was guess and mull over what he had learned until every option and scenario was exhausted. And he would get little sleep and he would be just as curious when he came back tomorrow to go through this grueling process again, but now, he had a job to do.

"Come on Malfoy, just give me something…" Harry mumbled to the blobs before him. "Just one memory… Please."

It wasn't meant to work, seeing as nothing ever really did for the Gryffindor, but no sooner did the words leave his mouth that the stream froze, a new memory sitting in front of Harry, patiently waiting for him to step forward.

"Really?" Harry muttered in surprise, looking up and down the line of blurs, as if the whole thing was a joke and it would start speeding past him the moment he reached out. It couldn't have been this easy… Calling a memory forward wasn't something he had known how to do and he doubted that's what was happening now. But it's not like he had many other options… so when he did take a hesitant step and nothing seemed to go awry he bit his lip and plunged ahead.

XXX

"I didn't teach you everything I know so you can follow around that toad of a woman!" Snape hissed as Harry spiraled down into the potions classroom. The room was empty besides Severus and Draco, the two of them standing in front of the professor's desk, looking over each other in worry and exhaustion.

Draco frowned at his godfather, leaning against the table top as he undid his tie. It was then that Harry fused with the pureblood. "She works next to father in the Ministry? What would you have me do?" Malfoy mumbled in exasperation, feeling both defensive and shamed as he watched his godfather pace around the podium, knowing that he was the cause of Severus' frustration. "It's not as if I could have said 'no' to the Inquisitorial Squad. 'Oh no thank you Dolores! I don't really _feel_ like trying to catch Potter today, perhaps next week instead!' How would _that_ have looked?"

Snape pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and finger, sighing in defeat as he turned to stare at his godson. "Must you provoke? With that stunt on the Quidittch field and now house points?"

Draco felt an angry flare of guilt as he stared evenly back at his professor, his fists clenching at his sides. Of course Severus knew that Draco had no choice but to make Potter hate him… Of course he knew that it was the only thing that kept Lucius from maiming him once again… but did he _have_ to throw it back in his face? Did he have to remind him over and over about his cruel actions to the other household?

No, he didn't like Gryffindor, and he had always been jealous and bitter of Harry but he didn't hate the kid so much that he would willingly mock his dead _mother._ If only they weren't so bloody stubborn! They had to be so goddamn virtuous, the whole lot of them! How else could he have kept him off the pitch? How else could he have proved to Umbridge that he was on her side but mock and bully and taunt… It's not as if leaving some notes for the Gryffindorks had done well in the past… Potter was so damn_ clueless_! It had literally come down to letting the bloody dolt beat him senseless with a snitch just to try and steer the brute in the right direction…

"You act as if I enjoy letting him knock me around like a stuffed doll!" Draco mumbled. "Did you ever stop to think that perhaps I don't want to help out anymore? That I'm tired of playing messenger without the messages? I have to cower away from him every damn duel, have to cause half the school to hate and ridicule me, have to pretend that I'm so conceited and cowardly and stupid just so he fucking_ gets it _and for what? What good have I done? Got him banned from his one and only form of entertainment? Gotten his friends to despise me to the point of no return? What good am I doing Severus? What the bloody hell is this for?"

And Harry could do nothing as Malfoy ran a hand through his hair, aware that Snape had inched closer, hesitantly laying a calloused hand on their shoulder in the smallest bit of comfort. _Draco had done… what? _"I'm tired Severus. Potter's so bloody _oblivious_… and the more I try to help the worse things get. You realize father had me speak to Skeeter _again_? There's only so many lies I can make up. Sooner or later not even The Prophet will spew the garbage I give them… And Dolores doesn't quite trust me, she doesn't much care for you and she knows you're my godfather."

"You knew this wouldn't be easy Draco. The boy is a simpleton, I warned you first year…" Snape offered in a voice Harry assumed he considered consoling. "It is however, a little late to turn back now."

"I know that!" Draco mumbled. "But if you think I like the pink cow then you're wrong." Draco seated himself on the top of the desk, biting down on his lip as he let his thoughts drift back to the Quidditch pitch. Umbridge had told him that she needed Potter to be unable to play, told him she didn't want to see him on another broom as long as he was in Hogwarts but the spell she had suggested was one Draco had never heard before and he had known immediately by the look on her face that there was a fair reason for that.

So he had settled with getting the Chosen One angry instead, aware that he may be able to cause enough of a fight that might land them with a suspension if nothing more serious… That only left the problem of provoking Potter enough to actually fight him, which he admitted wasn't very hard. The quickest way would be through Weasleys. Potter rarely responded to insults of himself, but his loyalty to the red-heads was unwavering… Of course, the dolt hadn't made a move when he heard the Weasley song though, and the Gryffindor girls had almost succeeded in defusing the situation before Draco had no choice but to bring in their parents. One hospital visit later and he learned that Potter and one of the twins had battered him to a pulp and been banded from the game altogether. Bloody brutes…

Umbridge however had been pleased enough with the results… So pleased that she had invited him into the Inquisitorial Squad. "I assumed you'd be happy I got in her lovely little group." Draco mumbled. "Didn't you want me to keep an eye on her?"

"Of course I did, I just detest the thought of you being her little hunting dog." Malfoy allowed a smile to grace his lips.

"No, you much rather me be _yours_." Snape's eyes widened in guilty realization and he reached out a hand to Draco once more, but before he could grab his shoulder Malfoy was already shifting away, not sure he'd be able to hide the hurt in his voice if Severus did touch him… Not that it _really_ mattered, he was sure his godfather had already read his thoughts. "It's fine Sev. I get it, I understand. Besides, I trust you so I don't mind."

"Draco…" Snape tried for something reassuring, something to convey whatever emotions his stoic face hid but after two attempts of opening and closing his mouth he sighed and looked away, deciding to change the subject altogether. "Your father has kept in touch with you?"

Draco wanted to laugh, of course, bloody Slytherin pride… They were good at running away from uncomfortable situations. All of them… Really, it was just a house trait, but it didn't make the longing go away… However, Draco did what he had always done, shrug and forced the coy sneer up, shutting away the lonely feeling as quickly as it had come. He had chosen his side after first year, deciding on how he had felt about Potter shortly after the term ended… And his decision had only been confirmed when Severus told him about Lily Evans and his promise to her.

It didn't make things easier but there was no use in complaining now. Severus had warned him after all…

"Father always keeps in touch with me." Malfoy replied bitterly. "He wishes to hear about _everything _that happens here at Hogwarts." Snape blinked back at him, a silence filling the space between them until Draco took some pity on his godfather and smirked. "He wouldn't hex me now Severus. Despite my public displays with the other students I _can_ defend myself. You don't have to worry so much."

"If I had been a better godfather to you, it wouldn't of happened in the first place…" Snape said through clenched teeth and for the first time Harry realized that Snape's sacrifices hadn't only been of himself… How many times had he watched Lucius push Draco around and not reprimand him? How many times had Draco gone to his godfather and asked for help only to be denied because Severus had to stay on the pureblood's good side...? Merlin... What had they given up for Harry Potter's survival?

"I don't blame you for any of that Sev." Draco replied truthfully as he slid off the table and to the floor. "I'll let you know what Dolores is up to when I learn something." Snape nodded as he walked Draco over to the door, waving his wand and releasing the silencing charm they had been standing in.

"Do make sure you do the exercises I showed you." Severus ordered. "Control your emotions Draco."

Malfoy smirked though there was no joy as he turned to his godfather and gave a deep bow.

"Always do professor."

Harry pulled away from Draco, ripping himself from the blond's mind, pulling, spiraling, away, landing once more on the tiled floor as his chest fought for breath. He ignored Blaise's raised eyebrow, ignored Narcissa's abrupt presence and Olivia's demanding voice. Gasping, Harry bowed his head between his knees and fought through the clenching in his abdomen.

Going through the painful truth about Severus had been hard enough, now to hear that Draco had been working alongside of him? Helping Harry throughout the years? What had he meant that Harry was supposed to hate him? What did he mean he was reporting to Severus about Dolores Umbridge? What the fuck was he on about, when he had mentioned leaving the trio notes before? Steering Harry in _what _direction?

No…

No!

"Mr. Potter-"

"That stupid prick!" Olivia stepped back as Harry's voice came out in an angry hiss, her eyes widening as he stared up at her.

"W-What-?"

"That goddamn little prick!" Harry thundered back to his feet, meeting Narcissa's cold gaze with his own. "Did you _know_-"

"Watch it Potter!" Blaise demanded from the other side of the blond's bed. "You need to cool off!"

"Did_ you_ know?" Harry turned to him then, not able to keep the trembling from his voice.

"Know_ what_?" Zabini challenged. But there weren't any words to describe just what Harry had meant…

That Draco had been helping Severus? Helping _him_? Did they even know what the two of them had given up? Did either of them _know_ who Draco Malfoy truly was?

"I… I have to go." Harry finally mumbled, turning from the confused trio and reaching for the door.

"Go? Go where?" Olivia asked in disbelief.

"To Hogwarts."


End file.
